Here is a Thread I started all about the Love Languages , an online test, etc. What R You & Spouse's Love Languages & How does this affect your Marraige?
I can truly understand what you are looking for in bed, I have started posts about this issue - go here >> Husbands who are not Dominate enough & Wives who are - how to reverse roles?
It sounds as though it is a little more than that in your situation though, like he is not carrying OTHER tasks around the house, maybe a little "Acts of Service" suffering on top of always needing to initiate the sex. I can see this would get old after a while. When you mention your husband is "slow moving", I bet he has a "Phlegmatic" temperment. You can
read about this temperment here: Phlegmatic Temperament | Above and Beyond Counseling Academy
I know my husband is this temperment, pretty much through & through. Luckily for us, he is not too slow moving about getting things done around the house, but it is true, I sometimes have to get the ball rolling, but once he starts a project, he finishes and finishes well. Every temperment has strengths & weaknesses, we just have to fine tune them a bit.
Someday, you won't regret taking the time to have these date nights, go out on your Anniversary, make it a priority to do these things. We once had 5 kids & 4 of them were under the age of 6, so I know what you mean about - chaos, stress. I allowed all of this to affect our relationship intimacy. I only WISH I could get those wonderful years back & take that time to be alone with my husband, to nurish what was there but easily pushed aside -for the kids's sake. Learn from me, Take the time, spend the $$ for a good sitter if you have too.
If you are very different from your husband in temperment , this is also a benefit. Sounds like you are. I know I am a Choleric / Melencholy and my husband is a Phlelegmatic. His weakness are my strengths and my weaknesss are his strenghts so it works well.
BUt in Love Languages, it is an Asset to share the same.