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Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 10-14-2010, 10:18 PM   #76 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

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Originally Posted by greenpearl View Post
Marco has a very sweet wife and he is a loving husband, he really wants to spice up their sex and get both of them wild in the bedroom. Nothing wrong.

I just told Marco to slow down a little bit. Don't try out all the fun too soon, right!
I did read some of his previous post after I wrote that I think you are right. Also I see that he is hispanic and so am I so I understand better from a cultural standpoint. Hispanic men are very passionate and devoted to family. Not saying other men are not, but the tradition is very strong.
So I concede, It sounds rather cute Now that I read his post. Not horrible as this isolated post would suggest. He really does come across as rather cute and good.

Sorry Marco did have enough info.
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Old 10-14-2010, 10:26 PM   #77 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

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I did read some of his previous post after I wrote that I think you are right. Also I see that he is hispanic and so am I so I understand better from a cultural standpoint. Hispanic men are very passionate and devoted to family. Not saying other men are not, but the tradition is very strong.
So I concede, It sounds rather cute Now that I read his post. Not horrible as this isolated post would suggest. He really does come across as rather cute and good.

Sorry Marco did have enough info.
I want to find out how handsome and romantic MARCO is.

My husband also told me that men from South America are romantic. They like to dance, right???

Latin dance, YEAH..........................
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Old 10-14-2010, 10:36 PM   #78 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

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The things he says about women related to sexuality shows what he really thinks.
This is the problem, your man has HURT you, he has degraded you, he has associated dirtiness with most women.

Not all men are like this and not all women are like that!

And Yes, most married men WANT, CRAVE, DESIRE the adventerous woman in bed. Your husband has stunted that within you by his previous words, they sting and now you fear to live out your fantasies with him. Boy is he ever an A-****.

You are right in NEEDING to feel totally ACCEPTED for who you are , what you can bring to the bedroom, and what you can unleash on him.

Totally normal to have such fantasies, the higher the sex drive, the more the fantasy life generally. Good girls, even virgins have such fantasies. You are so normal, nothing to be ashamed of at all.
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Old 10-14-2010, 10:40 PM   #79 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

Yes, salsa, meringue, very sesual the men move much better that American men they are not stiff. I wish I married a hispanic man. I really think I did not know or really understand what my husband was really like. I was born in the US but my family was very close nit. The only friends I had were my cousins and sister. I feel more latin than American because I had no contact with Americans until I went to school at age 5 ys. My english was even accented, the nuns said I needed to speak properly!!
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Old 10-14-2010, 10:46 PM   #80 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

so if the eastern men like us who ace in latin dances, can u consider us sensual too? LOL

fyi, there's a huge following of salsa/meringue/bachata here in malaysia too!
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Old 10-14-2010, 11:00 PM   #81 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

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This is the problem, your man has HURT you, he has degraded you, he has associated dirtiness with most women.

Not all men are like this and not all women are like that!

And Yes, most married men WANT, CRAVE, DESIRE the adventerous woman in bed. Your husband has stunted that within you by his previous words, they sting and now you fear to live out your fantasies with him. Boy is he ever an A-****.

You are right in NEEDING to feel totally ACCEPTED for who you are , what you can bring to the bedroom, and what you can unleash on him.

Totally normal to have such fantasies, the higher the sex drive, the more the fantasy life generally. Good girls, even virgins have such fantasies. You are so normal, nothing to be ashamed of at all.
I should say he never said any of these things to me directly but when there is some scandal involving woman he says nasty things. For instance, Do you remember the Kendra Wilkerson Sp? tapes released by her exbf.

I was livid that he released a private tape of sex with him, a man she loved and never expecting that it would be released. My husband, on the other hand , was critical of her for making the tape he felt she deserved to be exposed because she should have been smart enough not to make it. He didn't think the bf was scum and jealous of her success.

This from a man who want me to be a freak in bed. If I told him my fantasies I thinks he would think I was possessed. Although I am certain that he would love to do every one but could not accept that I came up with them.

I brought a vibrator in Jan and had my first orgasm!!. Boy was that wonderful now I know why people crave sex so much. I started to message my anus when I felt it contracting when I had an orgasm. It feels so good. I know this is TMI but I am so excited. I can't tell anyone else so forums are my outlet. I have learned so much since Jan.

My husband would probably bet his life that I don't think about sex but I do all of the time.
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Old 10-15-2010, 01:19 AM   #82 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

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so if the eastern men like us who ace in latin dances, can u consider us sensual too? LOL

fyi, there's a huge following of salsa/meringue/bachata here in malaysia too!

Mal,

For sexy dance, I'd like to watch sexy men.

Unless you are 180, well build, then I want to watch you dance Bachacha, for short Asian men I have seen, I am not aroused, sorry!!!
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Old 10-15-2010, 01:21 AM   #83 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

Marco,

Come.....................

And show us how sexy you are........................
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Old 10-15-2010, 01:32 AM   #84 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

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Originally Posted by greenpearl View Post
Mal,

For sexy dance, I'd like to watch sexy men.

Unless you are 180, well build, then I want to watch you dance Bachacha, for short Asian men I have seen, I am not aroused, sorry!!!
LOL
am actually more than 180, 184(6 footer) to be exact! and yeah, pretty ok built too!
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Old 10-15-2010, 01:34 AM   #85 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

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LOL
am actually more than 180, 184(6 footer) to be exact! and yeah, pretty ok built too!
WOW, SEXY....................

TOO BAD your woman doesn't know how to enjoy you!
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Old 10-15-2010, 02:21 AM   #86 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

LOL
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Old 10-15-2010, 02:25 AM   #87 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

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Originally Posted by greenpearl View Post
WOW, SEXY....................

TOO BAD your woman doesn't know how to enjoy you!
LOL
Well, be happy with what u have, it could be much worse yeah!
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Old 10-15-2010, 07:19 AM   #88 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

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marc,

I'm a bit confused. You've been married for over 20 years, right? In a thread you started about a month ago you described your wife as being conservative in bed and, at times, lacking enthusiasm for trying new things.

Sometimes it sounds like you are bragging about your sex life - very frequent, multiple orgasms, 7 days in a row, etc. But at the same time, you aren't happy.


It sounds to me like your wife does not want to do certain things - but you REALLY REALLY want her to do these things (esp. anal). Since you can't quite convince her on your own, you sought out "help" from this board. But instead of getting help, you are now arguing with any advice given by anyone who disagrees with you.

I think instead of arguing so much, you need to spend more time reading and trying to understand what the people here are trying to tell you.

Good luck.
I am listening....and I am applying what I've learned here...I tell my wife about how women here don't agree with me expecting her to be in bed extacly what my fantacies are....in addition, among my problems with my wife, was that she neglected me during the day....I would write to her and she did not answer me....I would do so many romantic things for her and at night she wouldn't really show much exitment to do anything special.....it is not about quantity, is about quality when you have been with the same person for 20 years....trust me if your wife gives you a lot of vaginal sex where you are the only one doing most of the work, you'll end up recenting your wife....we, men, need to be taken care off too.....and the way we feel this, is when the woman show us that they really want us....you know what I mean...I had have a lot of problems trying to get my wife to understand me why I need this...I need to feel sexy and wanted...she wouldn't do either....now it is happening....and I thank this forum becasue it gave me a different perspective......
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Old 10-15-2010, 07:23 AM   #89 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

So is this, after all, about her refusing to do certain things, or about the lack of enthusiasm you perceive in your wife?
"I need to feel sexy and wanted" we all need that. I personally think (and feel free to contradict me as much as you want), that what you're missing is something about your wife's attitude as a whole, rather than her refusing to do certain things.

I believe if she were to say "i hate anal so we won't do it" but then proceeded to tearing the clothes of you and show you how much she wants you, you wouldn't be complaining about anything. Is this what you mean?
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Old 10-15-2010, 07:33 AM   #90 (permalink)
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Default Re: Don't understand why is a problem if your wife becomes a porn star in the bedroo

I really think you may be "crowding/smothering" your W with all this text/flirting stuff. If she is NOT responding that usually means she doesn't like it.

It would drive me crazy if my W was "needy".

Quote:
Originally Posted by marcopoly69 View Post
I am listening....and I am applying what I've learned here...I tell my wife about how women here don't agree with me expecting her to be in bed extacly what my fantacies are....in addition, among my problems with my wife, was that she neglected me during the day....I would write to her and she did not answer me....I would do so many romantic things for her and at night she wouldn't really show much exitment to do anything special.....it is not about quantity, is about quality when you have been with the same person for 20 years....trust me if your wife gives you a lot of vaginal sex where you are the only one doing most of the work, you'll end up recenting your wife....we, men, need to be taken care off too.....and the way we feel this, is when the woman show us that they really want us....you know what I mean...I had have a lot of problems trying to get my wife to understand me why I need this...I need to feel sexy and wanted...she wouldn't do either....now it is happening....and I thank this forum becasue it gave me a different perspective......
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