Re: 3-somes...are they really worth it?
When I was a teen, a boy I was dating tried to talk me into doing a 3 some with me and my girl friend. First, he started talking about some guy he knew who did it that w/e and joked about it. That was a lie, he started there as part of a grooming process that I now recognize. He finally came out and asked if I and one of my gf would like to fool around. Mind you, I was not even having sex with this guy, just heavy making out no genitals touched.
Well, I was a timid person at the time but no push over or fool. I think he was rather surprised when I cursed his azzzz out and told he not to darken my door again. Then I told all of our friends what happened, it was very uncomfortable for him.
Because of that experience, this is a hot button issue for me so please give me some slack. I knew that guy for years before we dated, he knew my family and friends. I was shocked and thought that he picked me because I somehow made him think I would be likely to do such a thing.
Any man who whats a FMF threesome should do this first to show his reluctant partner how openminded and willing he is to step out of his comfort zone and spice things up. I'd suggest a MFM where you can watch him and the guy giving each other bj and then you have sex with the guy. Surely, no loving man would want his partner to do what he cannot even think of doing. A selfish, entitled man might. How many men would do that? If the answer is negative then think of what a woman is being asked to do. Then why ask women to do it? The big brain should register empathy and tell the little brain what to do.
Marco's response is typical - he wants to use the woman for his pleasure and would expect her to endure watching him cheat and her being with a woman, something that does not come naturally to her. Yet, he could not stand for her to have the pleasure of enjoying another man. If you cannot bear the thought of watching her having the excitement of enjoying newness of another man, what convoluted thought processes would make it OK for you Marco to have another woman while not even being able to think let alone watch her with another man? I am curious, what makes you more worthy of that pleasure than your wife?
This is a male fantasy born of porn, there is nothing in it for women. I think it has nothing to do with "spicing thighs up", love or intimacy in a committed relationship. It's pure p***s centered sex. Although I am certain that sex is an emotional connection to men, it can be, at the same time, too centered on his pleasure. He may forget that there is a human connected to those body parts and they are not there strictly for his use. I still cannot understand why women let themselves be talked into these fantasies that are for the pleasure of the male only and emotionally devastating on several fronts.
She has to watch her husband cheat, and she has to force herself to have contact with a woman when her sexual orientation does not lean in that direction. Yet again, I do understand - woman want to be loved and please their partner. But there is no love or intimacy involved in sex that is not totally and freely enjoyed by both parties.
If a woman is not bi and it is not her idea, then no man should suggest or try to coerce a woman to do this. It amounts to her putting on a porn show for him and watching him cheat. If sex is about love and intimacy, what has that got to do with love.
Last edited by Catherine602; 01-20-2011 at 03:45 PM.