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Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 05-26-2011, 08:07 AM   #46 (permalink)
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does she know you are flirting with other women?

ETA: how horny she was for the last pregnancy doesn't mean anything; she was with a different guy then. Every pregnancy is different.
well, it means something to me
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:07 AM   #47 (permalink)
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How old is she?
31
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:09 AM   #48 (permalink)
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i'm inclined to the latter - a princess. she was extremely hot as a young woman, and i think she still has the princess attitude of take it or leave it.

what she fails to undertand is that the tables are turned now - she is at the end of her high sexual demand, and i am at the beginning of mine.
So really sex is the symptom of bigger problem - she doesn't care enough to try and meet your needs. The vibrator is the tip off.
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:14 AM   #49 (permalink)
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So really sex is the symptom of bigger problem - she doesn't care enough to try and meet your needs. The vibrator is the tip off.
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i am aware that she uses it sometimes, and the last time she used it she seemed a bit ashamed. i asked her to let me see her toys, and as of yet she hasn't shown them to me but i dont push it because i dont want to give her hand that i am jealous of a vibrator - i'm really not jealous as long as my needs are met. i feel that the vibrator probably stopped her from sl**ting it up with lots of strange men

i dont think she has used it for many months now - i pay attention to the available time she has to use it and its not much between her work and actually having alone time without her daughter around
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:15 AM   #50 (permalink)
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All I can say then is, good luck.

I've been in your boat, probably got a ton less action than you when my wife was pregnant. Yes, I was frustrated and miserable for awhile, but never in a million years would have thought about going out and cheating.

When she is pregnant, your needs come second, period. As a dad you needs will also come second or even third, for a very long time. You said this isn't your first rodeo so I'd expect you to understand that. If she truly loves you she will come around eventually, but pregnancy hormones are unpredictable and maddening. There is no rhyme or reason to it.

I hope for your sake that she can learn to try harder, but if you really love her you should learn to be patient and stop taking it all so personally.
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:19 AM   #51 (permalink)
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All I can say then is, good luck.

I've been in your boat, probably got a ton less action than you when my wife was pregnant. Yes, I was frustrated and miserable for awhile, but never in a million years would have thought about going out and cheating.

When she is pregnant, your needs come second, period. As a dad you needs will also come second or even third, for a very long time. You said this isn't your first rodeo so I'd expect you to understand that. If she truly loves you she will come around eventually, but pregnancy hormones are unpredictable and maddening. There is no rhyme or reason to it.

I hope for your sake that she can learn to try harder, but if you really love her you should learn to be patient and stop taking it all so personally.
i reject your notion that i come third; an accessory to her life
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:19 AM   #52 (permalink)
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Feed me, **** me, don't nag a lot.
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:21 AM   #53 (permalink)
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like i mentioned before, she TELLS me that she will try harder, recognizes my needs, needs to be more creative in bed, etc

it never comes to fruition
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:24 AM   #54 (permalink)
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Feed me, **** me, don't nag a lot.
lol, i got in trouble when i reduced my argument to absurdity! but this boils it down nicely!

dont just f*ck, put some feeling in it

I even forwarded the thread on this board about what makes a woman good in bed - the only response i got was "PILOTGUY!"
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:25 AM   #55 (permalink)
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i am aware that she uses it sometimes, and the last time she used it she seemed a bit ashamed. i asked her to let me see her toys, and as of yet she hasn't shown them to me but i dont push it because i dont want to give her hand that i am jealous of a vibrator - i'm really not jealous as long as my needs are met. i feel that the vibrator probably stopped her from sl**ting it up with lots of strange men

i dont think she has used it for many months now - i pay attention to the available time she has to use it and its not much between her work and actually having alone time without her daughter around
By tip off I mean she knows you're ready - willing and able and she went to the vibrator. As a woman it means she's horny and wants to get off but doesn't want the work or effort of getting you there too.
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:26 AM   #56 (permalink)
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By tip off I mean she knows you're ready - willing and able and she went to the vibrator.
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good point
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:30 AM   #57 (permalink)
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Well I'll tell you, I am racked out here on week two of the flu and brochialpneumonia. When my otherwise cold and distant wife put a sammich plate on my chest while I was zonked out asleep on the couch I thought I died and went to guy heaven. It was truly the most tender thing she's done for me all year.
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:31 AM   #58 (permalink)
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i reject your notion that i come third; an accessory to her life
it doesn't make you an accessory; it just means that the baby is going to have to be fed, burped, put to sleep; and mom will need to be well rested, secure and happy before you can even think of having your needs met.

It's just a reality of fatherhood.
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:35 AM   #59 (permalink)
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By tip off I mean she knows you're ready - willing and able and she went to the vibrator. As a woman it means she's horny and wants to get off but doesn't want the work or effort of getting you there too.
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i forgot one thing she said to me once, unitil you brought this up.

the time when i could not get hard and she got frustrated she actually said these words "its too much work"

i got pissed and asked why pleasing the man you love is too much work? she had no response.
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:38 AM   #60 (permalink)
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it doesn't make you an accessory; it just means that the baby is going to have to be fed, burped, put to sleep; and mom will need to be well rested, secure and happy before you can even think of having your needs met.

It's just a reality of fatherhood.
of course - understood.

but how nice would it be to hear these words "i know that you are neglected because of the baby, but tonight when the lights go out i'm gonna s**ck you dry big man"
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