Lon

Well I agree with you about the live and let live part, though that lifestyle, by definition, is more than "two" consenting adults. To me it has just become indicitive of a larger underlying issue... it is not our place to dictate how consenting adults can behave, but it is our responsibility to recognize the reasons our culture is changing and try to analyze its affects on marriages, relationships and families.

Therealbrighteyes

It has nothing to do with being a nice guy. Same as threesomes MFF. Is that also a nice guy thing? Come on. Some people like watching or hearing about their partners having sex with others. It's a fetish. Nothing more, nothing less.

Trenton

I've had the same argument in regards to Taken in Hand. The problem is how do you help someone who doesn't want help?

Don't worry, the culture is actively seeking to objectify women as well.

Jellybeans

This is exactly it.
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Lon

I think its not that easy to classify. For some, perhaps it is just a fetish, there are all sorts of open marriage arrangements. But as a nice guy whose W is trying to paint herself as a SA and making me believe I couldn't keep up as a way to justify her affair, I was VERY close to accepting that should she have made such a proposition. Of course, I'm picturing the scenario where the husband isn't being the voyeur, just stays at home and acts like nothing is going on while his wife is out servicing her sexual needs.

Thankfully I got my wits about me before she figured out such a scenario in her head, however I view this as more than just a fetish or living out a husbands sexual fantasy of having his W done by other men, in some situations I can see this as a coping method or way to sweep the problem under the rug (just as in the past when husbands' infidelity was tolerated when divorce was taboo).

fhg1893

This is what I've been trying to get at.

Seems to me it's more than "just a fetish," it's a trend. It's a trend enabled and constructed due to some peculiar cultural conditions that don't seem to exist elsewhere.

You know, I wish that was more of a joke. There are instructional books to this effect...

whammy

I am very open minded and to each their own. But if you are in a sexual situation with your wife and you are not the only d*ck in the room then you are either gay or the biggest rationalizing p*ssy in the world and your wife doesnt respect you at all... she just likes the arrangement

Jellybeans

I don't see this as "trend." I see it as a "fetish." Because this is not the norm and most men are not cuckolds.

fhg1893

Why are you so convinced this isn't a trend?

I've got my evidence, not that you'd accept it, but I'd like to hear yours.

Runs like Dog

I have to say that while I would kick her out on general principals it would not be with much anger or disappointment. She's already sleeping around. That ship has sailed. And if she's not sleeping with me, it's just that much less emotional. What am I going to get mad over? Would the scales fall from her eyes and she'd come running back? Of course not. So I doubt it would be some horrible moment with tears and flying waffle irons. It would be more along the lines of "You have about a week to collect your stuff and get out. Before you do, we have to go over the crucial financial stuff and separate our operating accounts and such."

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kashi

I totally agree with the quote above.

As the wife of a husband who has cuckhold fantasies I can tell you that from MY experience, and observation of cuckhold websites, a lot of those men thinks the woman is an object. They think they own their wife, and they get pleasure when someone tells them their wife is hot. It's like someone telling them they have a nice car, but a lot more extreme. Most men on cuckhold websites are complaining that the woman doesn't want to do it. They are looking for advices on how to convince her to do it. In my opinion, they are looking to control their wife into making her do things with other men... they want to "share" her because they feel like they owe something to the other men. They dont really care how the woman feels about it.

There is in fact a category of men who wants to be ridiculed by their wife. That in my opinion is part of another fantasy... the S&M type. It is often linked to the cuckhold fantasy. That part I don't understand but I think men might get tired sometimes of being "in control" and that's their way to take a break.

User223

There are many reasons why this lifestyle suits couples who embrace it.... And it is not always the man being "Mr. Nice Guy" - in fact, it is often just the other way around. Many times the man is very dominent in every day life, and PUSHES the wife into accepting this lifestyle, For whatever his reason (and yes, he could be objectifying her and using her as "live" porn)

The wives of these men are often abused women - and have been convinced that they should do it for him if she loves him. And after the initial degradation of it all, she learns to accept it, as she has every other form of abuse he doles out.

Anyone who has not been in, or been close to someone in an abusive relationship won't have any understanding of how she could be made to do somethng like this and will say "well why didn't she just leave him?" When caught in an abuse cycle, they don't think they CAN leave him. The abuser usually has her beaten down so badly that she has no self esteem and it doesn't matter to her anymore. It becomes a "stage" where she performs to win her husband's love again.

So no, cuckolding is not the extreme result of the "Mr. Nice Guy" for all cuck couples. It is also another form of abuse she must suffer.


<----- Woman who knows first hand

martydotcom

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martydotcom

Amazing how no one mentioned just have fun
Watching, being watched, can just be a component of "recreational sex."
A trip off the beaten path of. normalcy can be a thrill for two consenting adults
Life is short all too soon you may find yourself saying I wish I had
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martydotcom

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