Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?
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Old 07-09-2011, 01:19 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

Disclaimer: I'm not in cuckold relationship, and have no desire to adopt one.

I don't remember exactly when I first heard about this particular kink, but I've had a growing interest. As stated, having just figured myself out, throwing out the vast majority of my "nice guy" behavior, I've no desire to become involved. It does however hold a kind of perverse fascination for me.

Additionally, I've just picked up Robert Glover's, No More Mr. Nice Guy - about two weeks too late to serve as anything other than validation and confirmation of my own feelings and the changes that I've made - but, reading it has got me wondering if the growing popularity of the cuckold lifestyle is a kind of extreme result of the "nice guy" phenomena.

For those who don't know about the lifestyle, I'll give a bit of a primer.

This particular kink seems to be popular among white middle-aged, middle-class married couples, but it's by no means limited to these folks. There's a number of ways to fall into it, but it seems that it's most basic form is that of an open marriage where it's only the woman who sleeps around. She's the "hot-wife;" a sexually aggressive, promiscuous, dominating and typically attractive woman who actively seeks out and pursues purely sexual relationships with strong, alpha male "bulls." This is done with the full knowledge, acceptance and support of her "cuck" or "cuckold" husband.

Naturally, there are a lot of trappings that go along with this kind of arrangement which may or may not be present. For a few examples: There seems to be a predilection for black male bulls, as they seem to be perceived as being physically superior to the cuck husband. Penis size seems to be a major fixation; part of the cuck's inadequacy is his relatively small or average penis. Sometimes, but not always, the cuck is expected, or expects to watch the bull have sex with the hot-wife. The cuck may be expected to orally service his hot-wife after the bull has had his way with her.

This is just to name a few.

Now, promiscuity among women is nothing new to the human species. If our literary history is any indication, there used to be a lot of concern about female promiscuity. In Shakespeare, and many other writings, it would seem that a cuckold is an object of ridicule and derision by social custom. Such a male is perceived as weak and unmanly of course.

What seems to be different about the modern incarnation of the cuckold lifestyle is that husbands are actively embracing this activity. Having lurked on a few of their forums, it seems that these husbands often encourage their partners to go out and have extra-marital affairs. They seem to WANT to be sexually humiliated by their wives, and the lovers that their wives often bring home. And what makes me think, is that while fetishes and kinks are a relatively normal part of the human sexual spectrum, this is a whole lifestyle that seems to go well beyond kinky sex. That, and it seems to be growing in popularity by leaps and bounds.

The mask seems to have slipped off this lifestyle in recent months. Jack King was, or is, a Manitoba lawyer who asked a former client to have sex with his wife. This story wouldn't have amounted to much these days, but for the fact that the wife in question is, or was, a recently appointed Manitoba judge. I've not followed the story much, so please excuse the lack of details. It's been widely publicized if anyone feels like digging up the dirt.

So, the question I'm pondering now is, isn't this lifestyle an extreme manifestation of the "nice guy" phenomena? It seems that these submissive males can't accept themselves, and have chosen instead to wallow in a kind of self-deprecating depravity.

It also occurs to me that if this is so, and if this is indeed gaining wider and wider popularity, then western culture seems to be in serious trouble. Emasculated males are males who strike me as being incapable of "manning up" and doing the hard things that men have always done. To have such an apparently large population of them is a bit disturbing.

So, I'm putting it out to those who think about marriage as much and as deeply as I do.

What do you folks think about the cuckold lifestyle? Is it essentially just the "nice guy" phenomena taken to its logical extent?
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Old 07-09-2011, 01:27 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

It certainly looks that way.

What's in it for the women? Adventurousness, thrills, etc. - but they don't have to surrender the security of their "cuck".

Cake eating behavior taken to the extreme.

And, the cuck doesn't have the balls to stop it.
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Old 07-09-2011, 01:41 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

The cuckold/hotwife 'lifestyle' is a product of sick f*ck minds.
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Old 07-09-2011, 01:45 PM   #4 (permalink)
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The cuckold/hotwife 'lifestyle' is a product of sick f*ck minds.
Damn right Mori!

Those are the same ones out swinging and cheating.
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Old 07-09-2011, 01:50 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

I've heard it suggested that some men enjoy their "hot wife" enjoying passion generated by another man.

I've written this before - and I meant every word. I do not know what planet I'd have to be on to tune into that channel.

Nor do I want to know.
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Old 07-09-2011, 01:58 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

Conrad, while I can understand and appreciate your reluctance to want to think about this... I'm of the opinion that we're soon going to have no choice in the matter.

I'd like the forums to feel free to speculate and play with this idea.

My personal take is that this phenomena is toxic. It's a cancer that is rotting and destroying our society from within. I'm starting to seriously worry about this. But I don't want to checker the discussion with my own feelings.

Far be it for me to deny anyone their genuine kink, but this smells like serious trouble. It's like we're just begging for the barbarians at the gates to come storming through and destroy everything we've tried to build in the west. Nice guys are in that sense trouble. And the women must be aware that this can't be good; these forums are littered with victims of various stripes. But we all seem powerless to do much about this trend. I get the sense that we're fighting a growing tidal wave of emasculation which sweeping through and destroying our most deeply held values.

As an historian, I'm worried. This looks, and smells like serious civilization destroying trouble.
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Old 07-09-2011, 02:14 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

My take is that inadequate men who cannot enjoy sex with their wives due to low self esteem then objectify their wives, turning them into whorse in order to compenat. They use their wives like porn.
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Old 07-09-2011, 02:33 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

Two issues:

The cuckhold lifestyle, I'm not aware of a growing trend and find this interesting to read that it is so popular.

I will say, years ago my uncle, I assume was involved in this, as he befriended a married couple, and being divorced and single himself, eventually moved in the same house with her and her husband.

I was a youth during this time, and although I was aware that my uncle was most certainly having sex with this married woman, it didn't even occur to me until my own father made a comment about the sad situation of his brother and what kind of man was this married woman's husband, that this husband fully knew about it and tolerated it!

And the second issue, the danger of emasculated men to halting forward progress of technology and social stability.

I posted this thread not long ago, very much along this same line of thinking:

Women hating Nice Guys, the end of civilization?

So it is, the buildings we live and work in, the technology that drives the computers that we type, the science that drives our modern medicine, the airplanes that we fly on, the trucks that transport our goods, the very roads they drive upon and the cities they travel between, all these all are products of science, engineering, and construction flowing from the sharp minds and strong hands of the many good men that came before us.

So that which in a broad scale stands against strong, masculine, decisive men, and instead encourages the wholesale emasculation of men, should not be considered benign nor treated lightly.
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Old 07-09-2011, 02:40 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

I don't think these are nice guys at all. Nice guys don't push for their wives to have sex with other men. It serves the purpose of the men. If I recall most stories I have heard, the women go into this reluctantly at first. The men push for it as a warped solution to their feelings of inadequacy.
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Old 07-09-2011, 03:10 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

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I don't think these are nice guys at all. Nice guys don't push for their wives to have sex with other men. It serves the purpose of the men. If I recall most stories I have heard, the women go into this reluctantly at first. The men push for it as a warped solution to their feelings of inadequacy.
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Cuckolding has been around for centuries, and in modern times is typically regarded as a fetish. I would hope that it is a very small segment of the population engaging in it.

I am more concerned that the disintegration of the family unit in our modern times from many different factors and the general laxness of morality in our society (of which I agree cuckolding is hopefully a very small contributing factor) will more greatly affect the 'slide' of civilization.

And to BBW, I am assuming you did not purposefully forget about the many contributions that women have made and currently are making in our society? Since I have an engineering degree and am gainfully employed in keeping some of those modern contrivances you mentioned going, I would not like to think you meant they could be kept going by only the men of the world. I think to keep everything going it will take the concerted effort of both men and women working together.
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Old 07-09-2011, 03:28 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

Amen to that!
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Old 07-09-2011, 05:57 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

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Cuckolding has been around for centuries, and in modern times is typically regarded as a fetish. I would hope that it is a very small segment of the population engaging in it.
That segment appears to be growing.

And while extra marital affairs have been around forever, as a society, we always used to look down on such men who turned a blind eye to their unfaithful wives. This particular phenomena seems to be something new. And as a society, we don't seem to be actively condemning this new trend. Perhaps we've forgotten the importance of family, and self reliance. In an age of rampant political correctness, what can we say?

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Originally Posted by Enchantment View Post
I am more concerned that the disintegration of the family unit in our modern times from many different factors and the general laxness of morality in our society (of which I agree cuckolding is hopefully a very small contributing factor) will more greatly affect the 'slide' of civilization.
A fair assessment. I suggest that cuckolding in the west, while problematic, it isn't the disease, it's an indicator. It strikes me as a huge red flag that we don't seem to be seeing at the moment.

Cuckolding as an indicator suggests to me that we're in a much more precarious position than we like to thing. We appear to be risking a spectacular fall.

I agree with Big Bad Wolf. This is serious and it could be very dangerous.

Last edited by fhg1893; 07-09-2011 at 08:01 PM.
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Old 07-09-2011, 06:09 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

I'll admit, I've fantasized about my wife having sex with another man, or engaging in a MMF threesome with her. But, I have no desire whatsoever to act on it, and if it happened behind my back, hopefully I'd be in a good mood when I found out otherwise somebody might catch a bullet.
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Old 07-09-2011, 08:36 PM   #14 (permalink)
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I'll admit, I've fantasized about my wife having sex with another man, or engaging in a MMF threesome with her. But, I have no desire whatsoever to act on it, and if it happened behind my back, hopefully I'd be in a good mood when I found out otherwise somebody might catch a bullet.
Well, knowing 2 swinger couples I don't think its Mr.nice guy at all, at least not in my experience. The two Guys I know just totally get off watching......and its not any guy they like too watch porn star Hung guys with their wives. One couple is married 10 years the other 7 .......its pretty popular fetish in certain circles.
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Old 07-10-2011, 11:55 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: Cuckold Lifestyle - Extreme result of the "Nice Guy" phenomena?

There's a difference between this lifestyle and swinging. When you're swinging, both partners can fool around with people outside the marriage.

In a true cuckold relationship, the woman has pretty much free reign. The male is expected to be celibate, or near celibate.
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