Re: Wife feels "touched out"
A simple answer is that love needs to be nurtured to stay healthy. Even with your children, they will be more strongly attached with their mother.
I suggest you take the time to communicate with your wife and try finding solutions as a couple.
Tell her that you miss the intimacy and how you both can work as a team to get back to a strong relationship.
Write down the needs you both have, the needs of the children, and the needs of the family. In the end, no one will get 100% of what they want, but at least you will both have some ideas of working towards the middle of what conditions you are both okay with.
The hard part is that your bond is weak. With a strong bond, there will be a tendency to listen, understand, and a stronger motivation to work as a unit.
I am such a tree hugger because it gives me wood!