I had a melt down out of frustration about half an hour ago.
All last week I was very busy working and we had no sex. This week we had four days off together and next week it's back to the crazy schedule so you think he would want to get it while he can but no.
The only time he wants it is when it's his idea so of course dh wanted to have sex when I came home from working overnight on Monday morning. I was so tired I could barely participate but I didn't want to turn him down. I thought a repeat when I was less tired would be nice and I waited for him to initiate but of course he didn't.
On Tuesday night I showered and he was just lying there not looking interested. I didn't say anything or touch him but finally he showered and we have sex. It was pretty mediocre and afterward he told me that he did it because I had showered and he thought I would have an attitude if we didn't have sex. How insulting.
Anyway, today is Thurs and I'm going to be busy until Sat morning and then next week is extremely hectic for me. I know that with a husband like him I shouldn't even feel in the mood to have sex but I really can't help myself. Maybe it's my hormones but I honestly have the desire to have sex at least 4x weekly so a day in between isn't bad but longer than that and I just want it already.
He's playful all morning. He follows me around the house and slaps my rear end and tells me he had a wet dream about me last night but no sex. Why would a man go to bed horny when he has a woman lying right next to him that isn't going to say no is beyond me? Why is he telling me this? Does he think I'm supposed to be happy to hear it?
After he tells me all of that and spends half the morning chasing me, spanking me, pinching my nipples etc. he tells me that he wants to have sex tomorrow morning when I come home from work!? Wtf? What is up with that? I've been home since Monday...I'm here flesh and blood with you right now, the kids are in school...the toddler is sleeping, and you want to wait until tomorrow! Ugh it's so frustrating. I'm tired of this guy.
I decide to try to nap since I have to work tonight and I showered before I did. I didn't try to make any moves towards him because I feel like I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't. I get into bed and he is in the living playing on the stupid X-box. I decide to watch a lil porn on my phone and masturbate. He comes into the room the first time to "play" I hid my phone and I was being responsive to him but he just left after a little while.
So I resume what I was doing but before I could do anything he comes back again and demands to know what I'm doing on my phone.
At first I didn't tell him but he started to brow beat me. So I told him you know what I'm doing...why do you keep coming in here and disturbing me. You don't want to have sex so leave me alone and let me do what I have to do. He sort of laughs at me and says let me help you out and he shuts the door on his way out.
This guy is unbelievable.
He goes out to the store a little while after that and comes back and offers me a sandwich.
I get out of bed to use the bathroom and said I don't want a sandwich I want a new husband. He said huh? I said you heard me I don't want a damn sandwich...I want to be married to someone else. I go back to the bedroom. He is still in the living room. I become enraged at this point. I go back to the living and confront him. I said maybe you don't care about sex but for me it's a deal breaker. I've been home days and you're just lazy about it. I said I don't know if you weren't attracted to me and you married me because you thought I was a good person or had a good personality but that's you're mistake because I can't live like this. Sex is important to me and I'm tried of you're lame f*cking excuses. This is like being in prison because I can't get what I want here and it's not like I can go out and get it someplace else.
He says NOTHING! I walk back to the bedroom...again...a few minutes later he quietly leaves to pick up our daughter from school...half an hour earlier than usual.
I can't take him anymore. I guess I'm too intense and needy for him. I guess he isn't into me sexually. There's nothing I can do about this. I can't make him want me and I can't live with someone who just isn't that into me.