I can't get an erection with a condom on. Sex hurts

cheewagacheewaga · 12-13-2008, 12:48 PM

I was excited on losing my virginity last night, but it never happened! I was hard and ready to go, and then when I put the condom on, I went totally limp! I left the condom on and continued playing with her, but I just could not get a full erection! I left the night feeling so frustrated and embarrassed.

Also when I did get the momentary erection, I tried to stick it inside her but I felt too sensitive down there and it hurt that I had to pull back. I still didn't manage to get inside her.

Any tips? We are trying again tonight, but I am feeling too self conscious and am thinking of canceling tonight on her until I can find a way to keep it up and not be too sensitive down there.

MarkTwain · 12-13-2008, 01:28 PM

After having 3 kids 13 years ago, I became King of the Condom. Nobody likes them, but to me, they were like good friends. We were not keen on the pill or any other method. We only stopped using them a few month ago.

The best thing you can do is play with one solo. Get used to them. Put one on, and have fun. In the end you will get excited at just the thought of one.

Any man who loses his erection, needs to cut down ejaculations for a while until normal service is resumed. If you are cuming 5 times a week, cut down to 3. Also, do kegel exercises.

When I was younger, I used to jerk myself silly. I only wish I had known what I know now. All that loss of zinc.

Lady Karen · 12-13-2008, 06:53 PM

cheewagacheewaga ... DO NOT RUSH THINGS ... as Mark said play with things on your own time ... get some practice in and when the time is right it will happen. There is something called KY LUBERCATION GEL and it is great. Try putting that on your condom and gradually work with things on your on & I am sure that in time ... you will be able to keep things up ... just take your time ... do rush things ... treat her like a lady ... give her special love ... and once the time is right & you will have that special " rising " and it will be worth the wait !!!

Jessica5971 · 12-13-2008, 11:22 PM

I would suggest that you investgate other methods of birth control as an alternative.

lostluv · 12-14-2008, 02:40 PM

Have you tried different types of condoms? Is there a chance you could be having a reaction to the material the condom is made of? There are allergies and sensitivities that can create issues with condom use. I can not use latex condoms as I have a latex sesitivity and any time I have tried I get dry, everything becomes inflammed and it is very painful. I also agree with Jessica, perhaps there is a different method or product that the two of you are more suited for. Whatever you decide remember to keep the lines of communication open with your SO.

cheewagacheewaga · 12-14-2008, 05:41 PM

Good news everyone! I finally lost my virginity at the age of 28 this morning! WOOHOO! The sex was not painful. I suspect it was painful last time because I was not aroused enough, and the condom was putting my foreskin in some awkward position.

The bad news. Sex only last for about 45 seconds. Not because I ejaculated, but because I went limp!!!! We went through about 6 condom packs over 20-hours and I could not sustain my erection! I was getting so frustrated and we were trying everything. She was giving me oral and stroking me, and the minute I put on the condom, I just go limp. I am seriously considering asking my doctor for Viagra.

I will check out other condom brands. We tried 2 Trojan brands with lubricants built in.

draconis · 12-14-2008, 05:55 PM

Keep thinking about where you are going and not the moment of stop.

draconis

Lady Karen · 12-14-2008, 07:19 PM

That is good to hear ... Just idea here is maybe if you take her way from home ... and go some place special and then you can relax and if you do cum again ... and it might just stay up so just take your time ...

dcrim · 12-14-2008, 07:43 PM

It's too early to pursue the V pill...you shouldn't need it (yet)!

I had problems with a previous GF and got the V,L,C pills. The problem, then, with my current GF is that I lasted TOO LONG. You're young, healthy. Just go for it, Chee.

As mentioned above, try another brand of condom. How well do you know your SO? Is she on BC? Do you need a condom? Is there a risk of an STD?

goatz · 07-22-2009, 05:58 PM

I had the same problem, I couldn't feel enough sensation through the condom, that's why it took me 45min my first time. GF had to go on birth control. But neither one of us had an STD. Try more foreplay beforehand. If it's nerves masturbate an hour or so before hand and go in with the mindset of stimulating just her but don't get to worked up, you might blow it. dcrim is right you shouldn't need V you are to young. Unless you have blood pressure issues it's most likely psychological. Try masturbating with a condom on by yourself, if you find sensation and can finish than you know it's your nerves. Sometimes a little alchohol works wonders to calm you down, just not to much.