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Sex problem

1K views 6 replies 7 participants last post by  climbingup001 
#1 ·
Hello...I want to discuss about sexual problem in my life.I got married 4 years back.After marriage I came to know that my husband suffered from health problems like liver problem,Nephrotic syndrome,diabetes and BP.Due to these reasons he never had interest in sex.Also whenever I forced him to do it,he was not capable for it due to erectile dysfunction.I am really frustrated due to his weakness and also because all these problems are due to his weak health which had been continuing long before marriage.He hid these facts from me before our marriage..Although he feels shameful of accepting his weaknesses,I don't want to leave him as I love him.At the same time I am unhappy because of these reasons.I want to know whether there is any solution of this problem.Also if he doesn't improve, I don't want to leave him.Do you think that true love can compromise with impotency?Is my decision to stay with him right?
 
#2 ·
You need to have an open and honest conversation with him and his doctor. You need the truth of what is going on. Then you can make a desicion being aware of all the facts and what treatment is available.
 
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#4 ·
You want to know if there is any solution to this problem? Have you been to see his doctors and asked them? Your husband's health is something he clearly isn't talking openly about. As his wife, you should know EVERYTHING. He doesn't share everything and actively hides things which means he can't be trusted which means you should attend his appointments with him so that you can get your questions answered.

I have no idea if your husband has any potential of improving his health to the point that his body's endocrin system functions normally and this is the information you MUST know in order to decide if you should stay with him or leave him.

I personally think you should leave him. He hid very serious and potentially life long health problems that actively prevent him from being able to have sex, and also prevent him from being able to take ED meds like Viagara or Cialis. He conned you into marrying him because he wants a nursemaid. A live in nurse who can help him manage his health and life when he is too sick to handle it all himself.
 
#5 ·
He hid these facts from me before our marriage...
Then the marriage is based on a lie!

Can love compromise with that? Generally speaking relationships are built on trust and communication and that forms your foundation. You can try as hard as you want to build a glorious life on top of that, but with a foundation built on lies and shame, it will crumble down again and again and again.

Try if you will...

Badsanta
 
#6 ·
Sounds like you still need to figure out a lot of things about your husband. Until can decide if you can cope with his condition in the long term, make sure you do not get pregnant. The last thing you want is to get a kid in the equation.

Unlike other posters I wouldn't say the whole thing is a "lie".... not sure you are in the US (or Western Europe)... where most of these sort of things (i.e. your sex life) are sorted out while you date someone, well before you actually marry them. In other cultures people get married before they get the chance to find out about them.
 
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