The post below is one of the reasons you are single.
You have a need to 'win' that consistently trumps your desire to understand.
And I am fairly sure that you spent a big chunk of your life confident that you understood 'men'.
So I'll try and explain this in the starkest possible terms.
When you are a really attractive woman in your mid twenties - dating guys your age - you can employ a sexual reality distortion field to get away with a lot of bad behavior.
Biology is so powerful in our mating window. And then gradually it isn't. In your 50's its not just that the underlying procreation driver is totally gone, but the men themselves have WAY less T.
You've got this adversarial vibe towards men - which is super visible in most of your threads.
This thread has a subtext which is: Why can't other people (mainly men) be cool like me and be happy without sex?
It's a good thing you are happy being alone, because your mindset is not really suited to a LTR.
You're right. We don't have sex as 'friends', room mates, parent/child, etc.
But we DO have a TON of sex outside of marriage via casual sex, friends with benefits, one night stands, living together, affairs, etc.
I could see your point IF we never had sex at any other time BESIDES marriage. But because the majority of adults DO have sex OUTSIDE of marriage, well...