It was my belief in college that the primary motivation for women to have sex was "to please their partner." I remember overhearing this woman say this to her female friends at a gathering of fellow church members, "men will never understand our desire to simply please them!" And she said that as if us men will never understand the plight of being a woman. While overhearing this, my heart sank. I thought to myself these women do not understand men's desire to "share" our joy, and that perhaps they only see our happiness as an obligation.
When I met my wife, we shared our intimacy. I've never looked elsewhere!
I think that's a strong over generalization. That implies that their having sex out of duty just to please the man as opposed to genuinely meeting their sexual needs. Women may have sex to please the man but they're also doing it because they want to have sex. It's often the man's desire that instigates it, though because it's both a gender role and because men tend to have a constant strong sex drive at that age.
I've met plenty of women that just wanted sex, used guys for sex, or had multiple partners. Maybe the motivation wasn't purely sex and it was to satisfy some psychological need to be wanted but same can be said for men. It doesn't matter. Many women of college age just have sex, period. Younger women just like to have sex more and it's quite probably a combination of a biological hormonal driver as well as just sewing their oats. There is this misconception that women are not sexually driven because our society considers them sl*ts if they admit it and they feel shame if they admit it to themselves. I can say in some of my relationships, the woman's motivation for sex was as much because they just wanted to have sex with pleasing me be the secondary priority. I've had girls/women cheat on me just to have sex with other guys and I think it had nothing to do with pleasing the guy.
My problem with this whole thread is the implication that sex isn't as important to women as it is for men.
The problem is that women's sex drive changes whereas men tend to remain constant unless they become unhealthy. A woman's body desires sex for procreation and as they get older that need is reduced. Without the hormones telling them it's time to have sex they simply forget that sex is important.
Give Vega a little testosterone and watch her go crazy if she can't have sex. Then maybe her perception of the importance of sex will change.
Like eating, drinking, breathing, and going to the bathroom, sex is something we just do. When we get married and agree to a monogamous relationship. When one of those two people doesn't do it (or rarely does it) then the other is left without, or forced to leave. That's why it's the end all be all deal breaker.
Also, as I previously said, the reduction of sex in the marriage is often an indicator of something else going wrong which is the actual reason the divorce happens.