Sex in MarriageSexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.
I have been married less than a year now, sex life has gone to crap in my opinion. I may get sex twice a week, and its just the wife laying there..no different positions, no nothing..just stick it in mentality.
Then on my birthday recently, I take the day off of work, shes a wife at home, baby is in daycare, whole day by ourselves, and she doesnt do anything during the day, saying IM spoiling her surprise for later, dont be inpatient she says...well evening comes and she ate too much and has stomach problems...
and no sex for my birthday...
Then when I bring it up, all she says is that thats all I can think about and not her feelings...
start backing way off, dont say ILY, dont touch her or hug her, stick with business discussions. be courtious but firm in all your interactions. see where that takes you, if she doesnt improve on her end then it isnt going to happen
I think sometimes that we (as men) see sex as a gift from our wives. Thus, we feel that she should "give it to us" on our birthdays or other occasions. To me this is not a good way to think about sexual relations. It turns it into a chore for the woman and something that is expected for the man.
I think sometimes that we (as men) see sex as a gift from our wives. Thus, we feel that she should "give it to us" on our birthdays or other occasions. To me this is not a good way to think about sexual relations. It turns it into a chore for the woman and something that is expected for the man.
Just my two cents worth.
Precisely! It isn't a gift of giving, it is a mutual pleasurable experience. Framing it any other way leads to massive resentment.
I understand where you are coming from... but your marriage is heading for disaster.
Your wife wasn't feeling good and you want her to bang you?
Definitely change your thinking about sex as a gift!
I can almost assure you now you will NEVER get sex on any holiday because you po'd your wife. They hold resentment BIGTIME!
Learn women and lay off the sex expectation... to get better sex. It's all in their MIND.
if the shoe was on the other foot they would be saying thing different.
why is the baby in day care and her not at work.
why did she over eat so much so you guys couldn't have sex. she should have been antisapating some loving its your birthday
I think sometimes that we (as men) see sex as a gift from our wives. Thus, we feel that she should "give it to us" on our birthdays or other occasions. To me this is not a good way to think about sexual relations. It turns it into a chore for the woman and something that is expected for the man.
Just my two cents worth.
I think many women do infact see sex as a gift they give to their man.
Otherwise relationships wouldn't look the way they do. Sex is a reward for good behavior by the woman for the man.
Wives don't just have sex with their husbands, just like that. It requires work, effort, endless pursuing and romancing by the man for her to give him sex.
I think many women do infact see sex as a gift they give to their man.
Otherwise relationships wouldn't look the way they do. Sex is a reward for good behavior by the woman for the man.
Wives don't just have sex with their husbands, just like that. It requires work, effort, endless pursuing and romancing by the man for her to give him sex.
Not always. Sometimes wives just want sex and don't expect all the frills around it.
Being husband or wife takes constant effort in the fact that we should always try to treat the other with respect and dignity. Sex is not a reward, just a natural part of loving someone. To use sex as a reward is a problem, imo.
Sometimes my husband isn't romantic...especially after a 12 hour work day. However, he is none the less sexy to me and I still want to jump him.
I think many women do infact see sex as a gift they give to their man.
Otherwise relationships wouldn't look the way they do. Sex is a reward for good behavior by the woman for the man.
Wives don't just have sex with their husbands, just like that. It requires work, effort, endless pursuing and romancing by the man for her to give him sex.
Maybe in your world. Stop with the generalizing. Plenty of us women fall on our backs because we want sex and not because it's Christmas or Kwanza.
The key thing I saw in the post is that she put him off during the day when both if them were alone at the house. Something about spoiling her surprise?
Then in the evening there was something about eating too much?
Seems to me she was making excuses.
She just plain didn't want to have sex. Posted via Mobile Device
I have been married less than a year now, sex life has gone to crap in my opinion. I may get sex twice a week, and its just the wife laying there..no different positions, no nothing..just stick it in mentality.
First thing that jumped out at me is it looks like you expect her to initiate. If I want to mix it up with my wife I grab her legs, slide her around, flip her over and bang the snot out of her pretty much any way I want. She does the same, or orders me to **** her from behind or whatever. Whats the problem with making it happen?
Then on my birthday recently, I take the day off of work, shes a wife at home, baby is in daycare, whole day by ourselves, and she doesnt do anything during the day,
Hey there it is again.
saying IM spoiling her surprise for later, dont be inpatient she says...
Id tell my wife "you bet Im impatient. You are sexy as hell and I want you now and later and later. Then Id dominate. She loves it and tells me so.
Then when I bring it up, all she says is that thats all I can think about and not her feelings...
suggestions?
commom bull**** but you can overcome that
you need to learn to initiate aggressively. If she rejects. Go play golf or ride your motorcyle and try again later. All the whiney nonsense is getting you nowhere. Man up grab her for a sexy ride she wont forget. Then flirt with her and make her laigh every day in replacement of all the unattractive whining.
NEVER complain again. Joe SUAVE doesnt complain and he gets lots of tail.
no sex on birthday 
