Sex in MarriageSexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.
This is not because I don't trust that my husband is faithful.
It is all the semen. I find it disgusting when I get up after sex, and there is so much of this gunk coming out of me.
We tend to be very open with each other, but I don't want to hurt my husband's feelings. He would be offended if I told him how I felt and hubby firmly believes that a married couple should never use condoms if they do not have to.
Going back to using condoms with a partner I feel comfortable with would not be acceptable. I would try working with my wife with a therapist to get her over her disgust before I'd accept that. I haven't had a partner use female condoms, but the male version really deadens the sensations and pleasure.
It is all the semen. I find it disgusting when I get up after sex, and there is so much of this gunk coming out of me.
Suggestions?
That's just part of sex. While I'm sure that not all women love this aspect of it every single time, many find this not just an acceptable price for a good time but an important part of the experience. And for a man, it's also very important.
I suggest that you seek therapy to explore why this is such a big problem for you.
I can understand about the mess part. A man likely doesn't know how uncomfortable it can be to find things constantly dribbling down your leg - sometimes not just immediately after, but like the next day. And if you have sex a lot, then that means you can have this happening on a daily basis and it can be uncomfortable.
In lieu of condoms, some things you can try instead - clean up immediately after sex, go to the bathroom and relieve yourself immediately afterward (and sit upright there for a little bit allowing gravity to help you), wear a liner/pad immediately after sex, wear a panty liner the next day, or use a tampon immediately after to help soak up some of the 'mess'. Oh, and for immediately afterward - keeping some wipes close by and a towel so you can make it in to the bathroom for all of the other ablutions is also helpful.
Oh, and maybe if he sees all of this cleaning and you express concern about it, he might be willing to wear one some of the time. This is the compromise we have in place. For instance, if I've got something really hopping the next day, my H will often just volunteer to wear one because he knows it can be a pain in the a$$ for me to deal with it as much as I have to.
I'm the opposite. We're using condoms and I hate them! I have to use them, I have chronic urinary tract infection which means that I have to run to the bathroom as soon as sex is over, pee, take a shower, take a pill, and drink a gallon of water, AND he has to wear a condom every time.
So why am I posting? Because we went from not using them, to using them, when it became clear that I needed more protection. Of course you can do this if this is what makes you comfortable!! We came up with some perverted reasons why we thought condoms were sexy, and went with it!
It's weird because I love being sexual with my husband. I don't have many hang ups about sex; we always have a great time.
I just woke up because an afternoon session wore me out! My husband's lust was much stronger than my suggestion that we save the sex for bedtime...he needed it RIGHT THEN. I happily obliged and I was overwhelmed by the romance.
I think therapy would only be needed if I was completely avoiding sex, because of the mess.
I would let him cum in my mouth, but not on my body. I don't find anything sexy about having spunk all over me like some porn actress. Ugh!
"Can we use condoms again?" I blurted this out before my clothes were off. My husband looked at me like I just told him he smelled. "Why do you want to do that?? We're married."
Couple has a point about semen being normal...maybe I need to be more relaxed about it. Not sure how to though.
But.... don't you cum and make a mess? I do. And don't you make a mess at TOM? I do.... The wetter the better.... sex is messy. I guess I think you are missing something if you try to keep it too tidy.
And, jmo, but I think it sends a weird message to your h... that his stuff is icky. We wouldn't like it if H told us our stuff is icky...
Of course I cum, but most women's fluids are not nearly the same volume and consistency as semen.
Also, a man can just wipe a woman's stuff away. He does not have to deal with sopping briefs because the woman's stuff streams out of him after sex.
Sorry, does TOM mean "Time Of Month?" My husband and I do not have sex during this time.
I agree that it sends an unhappy message to any man. That is why I was asking for advice on the nicest way, to say something that might be hurtful.
My husband's reaction today showed me that I may have to just grin and bear it. I like Enhancement's panty liner suggestion, though it means I will have to stock up since we have sex at least three times a week. Hubby wants to finish inside his wife, not always in my mouth.
Why do you associate having semen on your body with a porn actress?
lol. Wow. Just because you have your husband's cum on your body doesn't mean it's a porn.
I had it on my chest this afternoon because right when he came (oral), I coughed (we're both suffering from allergies) LOL I'm hardly a porn actress and neither are you.
You don't see the big deal, but I simply do not like semen on my body. We are all squeamish about different things...I'm not sure why you find this funny.
I associate it with porn, because I have seen a lot of movies where cumming on the woman was the big thing. Ever heard of bukkake or money shots?
18Likes
Want to use condoms again... 
My husband's lust was much stronger than my suggestion that we save the sex for bedtime...he needed it RIGHT THEN. I happily obliged and I was overwhelmed by the romance. 
