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Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 12-06-2011, 03:07 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Default Re: I don't understand women in this regard

As the OP of this beaten to death topic I am simply shocked at how many women simply DON’T get the whole sex and/or BJ part.


I have a close friend who is in the process of ditching his wife of 11 years because of the lack of sex/bjs. They have 4 great kids. He is successful, good looking, and a caring and loving Dad. He seems to treat his wife well at least superficially. Granted he is probably not perfect. Her H suggested OK if you don’t like/enjoy sex can I at least get a BJ once in a while which she refused. She has reported to my wife “she just doesn’t like sex” and thinks BJ are just gross. My wife hinted to her she may want to try and try and like (or at least tolerate) one for her H, family and marriage.

I am thinking here is a women who is going to cause herself irreparable harm to her and her family. I know her H has had several conversations and her position has kind of been “well that is just me”..so in other words “deal with it”.
Not to sound callus but, can you blame the guy?

I have faith that many women glaze over yet another BJ post because they may feel it does not affect them. Based upon conversations with my wife, my friends, etc. some women still don’t quite get the whole sex and or BJ thing. Just like some of us men are clueless about improving our listening skills, speaking nicely to our wives etc. Quite frankly if my redundant, verbose post gets one women to “get it” my erratic typing was well worth it.
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Old 12-06-2011, 03:11 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Default Re: I don't understand women in this regard

Quote:
Originally Posted by tjohnson View Post
As the OP of this beaten to death topic I am simply shocked at how many women simply DON’T get the whole sex and/or BJ part.


I have a close friend who is in the process of ditching his wife of 11 years because of the lack of sex/bjs. They have 4 great kids. He is successful, good looking, and a caring and loving Dad. He seems to treat his wife well at least superficially. Granted he is probably not perfect. Her H suggested OK if you don’t like/enjoy sex can I at least get a BJ once in a while which she refused. She has reported to my wife “she just doesn’t like sex” and thinks BJ are just gross. My wife hinted to her she may want to try and try and like (or at least tolerate) one for her H, family and marriage.

I am thinking here is a women who is going to cause herself irreparable harm to her and her family. I know her H has had several conversations and her position has kind of been “well that is just me”..so in other words “deal with it”.
Not to sound callus but, can you blame the guy?

I have faith that many women glaze over yet another BJ post because they may feel it does not affect them. Based upon conversations with my wife, my friends, etc. some women still don’t quite get the whole sex and or BJ thing. Just like some of us men are clueless about improving our listening skills, speaking nicely to our wives etc. Quite frankly if my redundant, verbose post gets one women to “get it” my erratic typing was well worth it.
I'm glad that you are so passionate about this topic. Nothing wrong with that. My point was I doubt there is any woman who doesn't already know all this. Since they do know it, they are chosing to ignore it or have other reasons. For as many women who refuse to satisfy their husbands sexually, there are just as many husbands who tune out their wives until 11:00 pm and then wonder where the magic went. It is rarely one sided.
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Old 12-06-2011, 03:41 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Default Re: I don't understand women in this regard

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Furthermore, I think they are a treat, a special gift that my wife gives to me.
What about the women on here who say their men basically only want BJs and rarely sex?

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3) Kind of ties into #2. We can relax, lay back and enjoy the experience. When we are in you we are likely doing some of the work. With a BJ orgasm we can experience our O without distraction. We don't have to worry about moving this way or that way or not moving this way or that way.
So is it an issue about who does the work? With intercourse, it's the man doing most of the work, and with a BJ it's up to the woman to do most of the work. Which one is more of the lazy lover?


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8) Giving a BJ and finishing with a hand job is like going out to dinner having a fancy ****tail glass of wine a shrimp ****tail for an appetizer, a fancy salad then having the waiter bring out a big mack for dinner. Ladies, I don’t care how good your handjob is (or you think it is) it is a disappointment comparatively.
Hand jobs are snoozers.

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This makes it an irreplaceable act for a women to do for her husband.
Again, I've read on this board women who complain that their man basically only wants BJs. Perhaps I'm a bit different than most guys, but a BJ is good every once in awhile.

I prefer da poooooooooooooosy.
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Old 12-06-2011, 03:49 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Default Re: I don't understand women in this regard

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I have a close friend who is in the process of ditching his wife of 11 years because of the lack of sex/bjs.
If he married her knowing that's how she felt, then that is all on him.

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I have faith that many women glaze over yet another BJ post because they may feel it does not affect them. Based upon conversations with my wife, my friends, etc. some women still don’t quite get the whole sex and or BJ thing.
I have a good friend who HATES that her man will not give her oral
s ex. Like, never. He has always been this way w/ her so it's not new. There are plenty of men who love nothing more than to go down on a woman. And there are plenty of men who don't.

Everybody's different.

Different couples/partners have different wants & needs. It's clear that you are very much into it so as long as your wife is satisfying you, then GREAT.

But what other people decide to do or not do is their business, IMO. It's totally in between them and their partner.

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I'm glad that you are so passionate about this topic.


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Again, I've read on this board women who complain that their man basically only wants BJs. Perhaps I'm a bit different than most guys, but a BJ is good every once in awhile.

I prefer da poooooooooooooosy.
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Old 12-07-2011, 08:52 AM   #20 (permalink)
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This topic has been done to death
Death by BJ!!! What a way to go!!!

Kill me now!!!

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Old 12-07-2011, 10:41 AM   #21 (permalink)
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Default Re: I don't understand women in this regard

I think one thing that always strikes me when I read these BJ threads is the utter fervency that comes across from some of the men.

You know what?

I LOVE my husband, but I do NOT worship him. Nor will I ever (and I do not want him to worship me either). I admire him, I respect him, but if he was so fervent that he somehow expected me to have some level of unadulterated desire regardless of how I felt or he needed that to build himself up or to measure my love and devotion to him by, then his attraction level would likely sink to the floor for me.

I can't help but feel that some men are literally shooting themselves in the foot by somehow expecting this undying adoration for their penis.

I admire ALL of my husband - his penis gets special attention, though, because it is attached to something VERY important - a great man.

If you are a man, and your penis does not get that attention, then start there - becoming a great man who has many admirable qualities and characterstics - and one of those characteristics is to let go of such fervency and expectation. You may be very pleasantly surprised that when that is removed, how much more giving and adoring a wife can be.
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Old 12-07-2011, 10:50 AM   #22 (permalink)
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Default Re: I don't understand women in this regard

The thing I find funny is that it almost seems as if the OP believes that women couldn't possibly understand the feeling of an orgasm achieved via oral yet....women have more nerve endings in their tiny little clit than men do in the entire head of their penis. I'm not saying that we enjoy our orgasms more, I'm simply saying that *everyone* man or woman enjoys being pampered abit. But oral isn't the only outlet for that.

My husband is actually tongue tied (the flap of skin under his tongue goes all the way to the tip of his tongue so he is not physically able to stick his tongue out, he had to have speech therapy to learn to talk, has a slight lisp, and has difficulty with certain tongue-related activities, such as eating icecream or giving oral sex. Its possible for him to do, but incredibly painful none the less.
If I had your mentality about the only way he could show me adoration would be through oral, then our relationship would have been doomed from the start.

*This is coming from a woman who can count on one hand the number of times her husband has ever gone down on her, however still offers him a blowjob (to completion) at least once a month and usually also spends some time kissing his penis before intercourse almost everytime we have intercourse (which is not nearly as often as she wishes it was, but still).
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Old 12-07-2011, 11:05 AM   #23 (permalink)
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Too. Much. Text.


Maybe if he talked less, he'd get more BJs. kidding.....or am i
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Old 12-07-2011, 11:09 AM   #24 (permalink)
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Maybe if he talked less, he'd get more BJs. kidding.....or am i
Or if he didn't insist that women "worship" at it like it's the
Vatican or the Trevi fountain.
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Old 12-07-2011, 11:10 AM   #25 (permalink)
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Or if he didn't insist that women "worship" at it like it's the
Vatican or the Trevi fountain.
lolll My husband would look at me like, o_O if I worshiped his penis.

I love his penis, but....I won't be wearing a charm of it around my neck. And he's not BJ deprived
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Old 12-07-2011, 11:12 AM   #26 (permalink)
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Maybe if he talked less, he'd get more BJs. kidding.....or am i
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Old 12-07-2011, 11:24 AM   #27 (permalink)
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Default Re: I don't understand women in this regard

We worship YOUR bodies!
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Old 12-07-2011, 11:25 AM   #28 (permalink)
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We worship YOUR bodies!
No you don't. My husband doesn't WORSHIP me. That's just creepy. he isn't into porn either, so don't tell me he's worshipping someone else's body He enjoys my body, as I enjoy his.
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Old 12-07-2011, 11:27 AM   #29 (permalink)
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Default Re: I don't understand women in this regard

Go to your nearest museum.

Big breasted women.

Men - the size of raisins.
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Old 12-07-2011, 11:28 AM   #30 (permalink)
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We worship YOUR bodies!
Never seen a vagina statue. Seen hundreds of penis ones though. Face it, YOU worship that thing and expect US to do the same.
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