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post #31 of 40 (permalink) Old 01-09-2017, 06:49 PM
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ejaculate inside

Would never have worked for us. W's cycles were crazy erratic and terrible mind numbing pain from PMS and endometriosis... tracking that would be an exercise in futility. We learned a great deal about the whole ovulation process when we went through fertilization treatments. Very mystical and magical process - I kid you not. Assisted pregnancy makes you realize doctors can only slightly influence the process - so much is out of their hands. It's pretty miraculous anyone is ever born. The only sure way to get pregnant is to be a teen girl living in a trailer park. Maybe we should have tried sex in a trailer park before going through in vitro


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post #32 of 40 (permalink) Old 01-09-2017, 06:52 PM
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Re: ejaculate inside

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You can disagree if you want, but even Planned Parenthood states that when perfect practice is followed the withdrawal method is 96% effective (that is, 4% of couples that rely on this method alone will experience a pregnancy within one year).
Sure....trust an organization that makes a living killing babies.....

Sheeeesh......
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post #33 of 40 (permalink) Old 01-09-2017, 07:35 PM Thread Starter
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Re: ejaculate inside

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Sure....trust an organization that makes a living killing babies.....

Sheeeesh......
Not that putting my trust in some organization is what this thread is about at all, and though it's completely irrelevant to my concern, what we be a more credible source of factual information regarding this statistic, in your opinion?

It doesn't really matter to me anyway if it's 96% vs 80% vs whatever, I'm aware of the risk and I understand the basic physiological reasons why it carries risk of pregnancy even compared to other methods. This is the method that works for me and my partner, my query is really about what am I missing out on using this method with regard to my sexual fulfillment with my partner compared to either no contraception or permanent sterilization.

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post #34 of 40 (permalink) Old 01-09-2017, 08:30 PM
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Re: ejaculate inside

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I have one Pill baby and one condom baby. Turns out, real world use of BC is less effective than lab studies. Who knew, eh?

Having spent countless hours researching, you are correct. The CDC and the WHO agree that the Fertility Awareness method is highly effective. In fact, used correctly, it is as effective as hormonal methods. The problem is user error.
Absolutely true.

Most women are not able to track their own fertility. Because it takes time, educating themselves on how to do it, and yes, as another poster pointed out, the mucous test and other similar tests are critical. I find it unbelievable that any woman would be freaked out by the tackiness/fertility of her own vaginal mucous. Really?

Guess that would not be a woman who swallows during a blow job.

Bottom line - if you are that in tune with your body, then yes, you can do your own birth control. The vast majority of people aren't.

I have three children with my ex-husband. We "planned" each of them. Right down to gender (yes, you can incorporate significant odds for one gender or another in the process if you want - it's not foolproof though). We had 2 boys close together (they are 21 and 20 years old now), then planned a daughter (she is 16 now).

With my fourth child, my second daughter, was the only time I was on chemical birth control at the time. Yes, they do fail, and yes, I took antibiotics for strep the month prior which rendered the chemical BC much less effective. And I got pregnant with my daughter - after my divorce and with my long term boyfriend at the time. She died at birth.

Don't let people become a priority in your life when you're just an option in theirs.
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post #35 of 40 (permalink) Old 01-09-2017, 11:32 PM
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Re: ejaculate inside

@Hope Shimmers, I am so sorry for your loss.

My eldest DD is my Pill baby. She was conceived when I was prescribed antibiotics for a lung infection. My doctor and pharmacist both knew I was on the Pill and neither warned me to use a back up method. I didn't find out about the antibiotic and Pill interaction being a problem until years later.

Never did pinpoint the reason for the condom failure. Condoms were used consistently, but my 2nd DD exists, so something went wrong somewhere.

My son was a "we'll take our chances" baby. I had my tubal done immediately after his birth. So much uninhibited sex since. So much.

Follow the evidence where it leads and question everything.
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post #36 of 40 (permalink) Old 01-10-2017, 07:59 PM
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Re: ejaculate inside

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@Hope Shimmers, I am so sorry for your loss.

My eldest DD is my Pill baby. She was conceived when I was prescribed antibiotics for a lung infection. My doctor and pharmacist both knew I was on the Pill and neither warned me to use a back up method. I didn't find out about the antibiotic and Pill interaction being a problem until years later.

Never did pinpoint the reason for the condom failure. Condoms were used consistently, but my 2nd DD exists, so something went wrong somewhere.

My son was a "we'll take our chances" baby. I had my tubal done immediately after his birth. So much uninhibited sex since. So much.
Thanks @MJJEAN

I get a little maudlin this time of year with her birthday coming up.

It doesn't surprise me that neither your doctor or pharmacist told you about the interaction. Want to know what's worse? I am both a pharmacist and a physician. I failed myself!

We did use a back-up method (condom), well sort of. The problem was that it failed which is the reason I hate them in the first place. But I should have known better. Truth is though, I never "didn't" want her... .same as I am sure you felt the same about your kids. I wanted her from the day I found out I was pregnant until she died at birth. I was more than capable of raising her without my ex since at the time he ran the other direction.

I hope to be in your 'uninhibited sex' situation soon. As it is, I'm in limbo because at 52 years old I still haven't gone through menopause. I doubt I would be capable of conceiving, based on age alone, but I know better than to count on that. And of course I'm too old for any kind of chemical birth control and too close to menopause (I assume) to do anything drastic.

Don't let people become a priority in your life when you're just an option in theirs.
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post #37 of 40 (permalink) Old 01-18-2017, 06:45 PM
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Re: ejaculate inside

I can sympathize 100%. My lady and I used condoms for many, many years. When she finally got on the pill, I was the happiest man alive, and she loved it too. As said many times, it's the most natural, fulfilling, bonding, and complete way to have sex with someone you love. Orgasming together is other-worldly. Baby-making roleplays, good god I feel dizzy just remembering it. Sneaking off, having a quickie, and then returning, looking at her, knowing that her body is full of my fertile juices as we stand here among these clueless people. Then having her whisper in my ear telling me how it's running down her leg. UGH!!!!!!! And yeah, the simple fact of not worrying is worth it's weight in gold alone.

Then we realized the pill was doing bad things to her body. So she stopped. Now we pull out, and let me tell you, it's like stuffing a potato into the tailpipe of a Ferrari. Nothing has stunted our sex lives more. Now, I can't lose myself in the moment because I'm scared ****less of getting her pregnant. It sucks for her because like someone said, I'm denying her pleasure at her most heightened moments. And just simply not being able to have that bonded feeling, and remembering it, just wishing we could do it....but can't. The pill screws with her, makes her gain a lot of weight and kills her sex drive. She's not keen on the IUD because she's been told too many horror stories, including a friend who got pregnant anyway with an IUD...

It's a little different, but can still fulfill SOME of the things....have you considered trying anal with her? It was actually her idea, because she misses my cum being inside her a lot. We've done anal a few times in the past, but lately she's been all about it. She's a little sensitive at first, so I have to go slowly and gently, but after a minute or so she gets into it. She came once while I was inside her, and I thought she was going to pinch my d--- off!
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post #38 of 40 (permalink) Old 02-14-2017, 05:51 AM
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Re: ejaculate inside

there is nothing natural about a condom and i find the stupid things take nearly all of the pleasure out of sex. i want to feel my wife and not some stupid condom. i love having sex with her love the two of us just going at it till i loose all control and finish inside. its a wonderful experience if its with someone who you completely 100% trust. the pill has worked well for the last 6 years but she had to come off of it because she has high blood pressure. i was going to have a vasectomy done but she expressed to me that she has a very strong want of another child. im going to honor my wife and we will continue to have sex as we always have had sex. no protection, no pill, and if we have another baby that makes two..... the nest will be full and i will get the vasactomy at that point. we are 35 years old and if she wants another the time is now before her body says NO. i will never use a condom with my wife whom i trust completely. frankly i dont want to be "protected" from her. i want unprotected sex with my wife i insist upon it. i want to be as close to her as possible during sex and a condom separates me from her. she feels the same way, she doesn't want to be separated from me with a piece of latex.

so i changed my mind and if she truely wants another baby im going to be a dad all over again. i will try damn hard to get her pregnant so she can have what she feels is a complete life with me. combining our two bodies to make another human life is incredible.

if you dont want to have another baby consider UID, birth control pills, ect...... but if your happily married and have complete and total trust in her i dont know why would wouldnt want to find a way to finish inside without wearing one of those stupid rubber things. i cant remember the last time i even bought those things, and i would probably have used less then a handful of them the entire 16 years we have been together. we have a completely monogamous, implicitly trusting marriage and i have no use for barrier methods of birth control. i dont want a barrier between us
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post #39 of 40 (permalink) Old 02-14-2017, 05:57 AM
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Re: ejaculate inside

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Lord, if a woman is squeamish about her own cervical mucus, she'd have some real issues with the pregnancy and birth process. She'd die at the sight of the various hazardous wastes and fluids oozed by babies and toddlers.



That's why I said "dangerous days".
Another forums I go to have had many lively discussions on FAM. Some of those ladies only have 3-5 days a month they feel safe having sex outside of during menstruation. Others only have 5-7 days a month where they don't feel safe. There are a few who have such wonky bodies they can't use FAM at all and only have sex when menstruating unless they're trying to conceive.

Just like all other methods of non-sterilization BC, FAM doesn't work for everyone.
It's not the substance, I think it's the word "mucus" that makes the Kristin Wiig in me come out. It sort of makes me squirm.
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post #40 of 40 (permalink) Old 02-14-2017, 07:16 PM
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Re: ejaculate inside

First 15 years of our marriage I used condoms. When we met she was on the pill but it made her very emotional so I told her to stop taking it. I didn't like it, but I made it work and still managed to have awesome sex. We finally tried for a kid (and had one) and having to return back to protected sex SUCKED!
I don't know why I waited so long, but a few years later I got a vasectomy and wished I'd done it sooner. Of course, I had to wait to be sure she didn't want more kids.

I really wouldn't be reluctant. It was super simple to go to the urologist, get the lecture "Are you SURE you're done with kids," and schedule the procedure a few weeks later. They say you have to ejaculate about 30 times to clear the sperm, so I had fun encouraging her to help me do that.

IDK, it's a pretty simple answer. If you know you're not having kids, do it. Then it's like the best thing ever.
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