Originally Posted by Married but Happy View Post
Wrong? I exaggerated!
My basic assertion (without the hyperbole) is still correct: Divorce is most often the best solution, if you want to have a normal, satisfying sex life.
You've toned it down a bit, but you are still wrong in your assumptions.
- Differences in sex drive is a big problem in relationships. True.
- Often people don't know how to solve this type of problem. True.
- With no solution, divorce may be the best solution. True.
But, notice that this does not lead to your conclusion. The fact that most couples probably don't know of a solution does not mean that none exist nor does it mean that couples have really tried to find a solution. I've noticed that the only "solutions" that seem to get mentioned here are:
1. The HD partner gives up on sex, sacrificing to make the LD partner happy.
2. The LD partner engages in unwanted sex, sacrificing to make the HD partner happy.
3. Both sacrifice to some extent reaching a median state of unhappiness for both.
I'm sorry but none of these seem like solutions to me. It seems that you've reached the same conclusion, but are then jumping straight to divorce.
Sure, some people will decide that other things are more important and stay in a sexually incompatible relationship, but almost all will still be dissatisfied and frustrated. They will try to make the best of a bad situation, but I doubt that many will truly be happy about it.
I've never suggested this. I wouldn't want to stay in a relationship where I was continually unhappy sexually.
It's not a choice I would ever again make, but I've seen how incredibly better life can be once the decision to leave is made and the impacts accepted and mitigated as best you can.
You are simply agreeing with me. I don't know why you think this is a new point.