Different sex drives - Page 9 - Talk About Marriage
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post #121 of 121 (permalink) Old 03-10-2017, 12:09 PM
Vinnydee's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: Southern USA, but longtime NYC boy prior to our move.
Posts: 683
Re: Different sex drives

I do not leave my wife alone. I show her constantly that I desire her sexually. She says I smother her with too much love. We have very different sex drives. My wife has a higher than average sex drive compared to other women. Yet, I wanted sex much more than she did because that is what I was used to before we married. Lived with a real life nympho before I met my wife. My wife had an unusual solution. She asked her best friend to have sex with me and then invited her to live with us. That took care of me but was not enough for her girlfriend who had sex with other guys besides me and my wife before she got married. Even then she got pregnant by one of three guys and none were her husband. I thought I was the wild one but my two ladies put me to shame.

Not the way most wives behave but then again, until you get into that lifestyle you have no idea of what friends and neighbors, even family members, are doing with their sex lives. We were always surprised to find out who was not in a monogamous marriage. Our girlfriend for 30 years was a prim and proper school teacher by day and Bisexual Dominatrix/lover by night. Even after she married she continued to be our girlfriend because her husband had a low sex drive and was OK with her seeing us. I could never do what he did. Our best friends asked us to wife swap and we found out that they had been into that for many years despite having two kids. There is a whole different world out there that we discovered where people satisfy their sexual desires without having to first destroy the life they made with their spouse by divorcing them, as is the morally acceptable way to do it in our society of serial monogamous people.

The marriage police will find all of these non traditional marriages to be immoral at the very least. However if you can live to see your 50th wedding anniversary and still be very much in love, the heck of what others think. We refused to join the ranks of the sexually unfulfilled that are unhappy, cheat or get divorced as a result of different libidos. Our sexual wants were not the same either. My wife likes gentle love making like very extended foreplay which is why she likes sex with guys. She does not like penetration of any kind due to some medical issues she had in the past so women are perfect for her. On the other hand I like BDSM rough sex which our girlfriend provided me. It was the best of both worlds for all of us. Some to have tender lover making with and someone to go wild with.

Read this to get an idea of how a few of us viewed sex outside of marriage: Why My Husband & I Sometimes Have Sex With Other People - mindbodygreen

Our type of marriage is not for everyone and I am not trying to sell it because it can just as easily ruin a marriage as save it. It depends on the people involved and their ability to mentally handle it. However, some of the principals in the above article can be applied to a monogamous marriage too. We are monogamous now and we make sure that each other is sexually satisfied. My wife will have sex with me anytime I ask, but I know her needs are less than mine so we compromise. She flirts with me and teases me all the time but she waits before we have sex until I am bursting at the seams. We keep it fresh and alive even in our old age. Find what works for you and then do it your way.

Many prefer to drown in a pool of their own morality rather than seek the safety of a different morality.

Last edited by Vinnydee; 03-10-2017 at 10:11 PM.
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