The only one who called the op, hudson a ****head, is you. You actually posted that, and now acting like others have said it.
Now does hudson have insecurities "hang-ups" - I believe so. That is my opinion and that of many others due to his own actions that he himself stated and the woman at the other site - which for the sake of easier composition and understanding, her name is "Gibrale" which I am very certain is the same person, and when I'm referring to her - will use her name.
My judgment of hudson is by his own words, Gibrale's posts only validated those opinions of him.
You are right, hudson does get to decide how to spend his life. But since he's on the fence of leaving this woman, without actually spending any time actually talking to her - *HE* is interfering with the life of a young mother and her 7-year-old son. That *IS NOT* his son. He has NO legal ties to the child, his actions are ABUSIVE to both of them and even himself. His justification for doing so *IS* childish and not that of a *MAN
* who is secure with himself IMHO. My opinion of that was before I read the words of Gibrale.
I think he does need some help with a therapist to talk about and work on his expectations, his insecurities, and his bigotry. None of those are healthy for bringing up children. He should do that no matter what he does.
So lets jump back to the facts as presented by hudson himself and for which Gibrale story also matches his. 1 -
He agreed to be in a relationship with this woman as friends then lovers. = YES. 2 -
As a friend at first, was she obligated to tell him about her sexual history? = NO 3 -
Did he tell her that he didn't want to know the sexual history of his ex-F? = YES. 4 -
As humans, are we always 100% honest? NO. We all omit information as needed. "do these pants make me look fat?" You may think, "yeah - a little bit, but you look hot", but what comes out of your mouth is "No, they look great on you". Sorry, but reality is that people will bend the truth a bit. Women tend to not consider blowjobs as "sex" in refernce to the movie "Clerks". I tested this out on a female friend of mine and I think its fun & educational for people to try it out to. I asked her "do you count BJ's as sex?" She said "no". So I asked her to give me BJ. She said "no", so I said "but you said it wasn't sex". BTW, I wasn't expecting her to give me a BJ, but to point out that to men - ITS SEX. Anything that involves a sexual body part to be used = sex. Now, of the many women I had sex with, were most of them "relationships"? = NO. I had relationships with about 8 women in my life. The other 100+ are not relationships. And you are not in a "relationship" if they just raped you. 5 -
Does his ex-F have the ability to go back in time, change her parents, change those who controlled her as a teenager? = NO 6 -
Did hudson have a relationship with his ex-F's xBF? Not really, might have met him a few times - but otherwise, after 5+ years was pretty much nothing, then out of the blue this same low-life sends him a porno for the purpose of manipulation and hudson, fell for it like a fool. = YES. 7 -
Did hudson sitdown with "his love" and spend 10mins, an hour, anything to hear her side of the story? = NO 8 -
Did hudson's ex-F ever cheated on him while they were together. According to both people = NO. 9 -
Has the ex-F tried to explain her side of the story? = YES 10 -
The trauma of dealing her exBF is apparent. Hudon has stated that she would be depressed and emotional when she has to deal with him. = that guy has a nightmare for her. She *IS NOT and DID NOT* have fun.
Simple matter fact. hudson has his own ideas for a mate, and thought that such a person exists. They do not. He didn't want to know her past and told her. She was put into position to not tell him all the details that HE said he didn't want to know. He was already aware of some of the abuse she endured. She, trying to protect him - didn't want to burden him how much she was hurting.
If they were married and she was raped, would hudson have dumped her? Shamed her - as he *IS*
shaming her now? Sorry, but reality is this: hudson is shaming his ex-F because she was sexaully abused as a child. And unlike most people in that position, she.. SHE
pulled herself out of her hell.
He's here for advice. He's on the fence but looking to jump ship. He needs to choose one or the other. If he's not going to see what he has done was wrong and make amends. Yes, he has rights to his shock and being upset about the video. But he is IN THE wrong to not talk to her about, and treat her like crap. It is punishment.
He needs to get completely OUT OF HER LIFE. NO CONTACT what-so-ever. Eventually someone is going to meet someone else and that poor boy will be more hurt. hudson is disrespecting that child by disrespecting his mother. If he cannot get over his "HANG UPS" or work on getting over it... then he needs to be gone from her life.