That is a predicament. I would like to attempt to reconcile and have a happy relationship again, however I don't know if that's even possible. I don't want to get her hopes up to crush them again when I am not able to stick with it. Trust would also be problematic, I imagine on her end as well. It's not something that I can even talk to her about without getting her hopes up. If she sees a glimpse of hope, or even if she doesn't, she runs with it and hopes that I'm changing my mind. I try to remain as emotionless as possible around her, which in turn causes her to believe I'm not interested at all. Hurting her is the last thing that I want.
Woke up with this thought. 1 -
YOU never had the decency to give her 5 minutes to EXPLAIN herself. Think about how that does NOT make you a strong, honest or respectable. 2 -
You *are* messing with her by seeing her when you interact with HER son, and giving her nothing but coldness. I mean, I can understand a few days to process this nightmare but... geez, 2 months? Only thing you have done is HURT HER GREATLY. If you are a religious person, I don't think Jesus would agree. 3 -
You talk about the mind-movies of watching the video, that it can't be UNSEEN. Okay, now what about HER nightmare of being raped for most of her teenage years. Being told she was only worthy of being a sex object. You are NOT helping. She is a much stronger person than you. 4 -
I stand by my earlier statement. If you figure out the wrong you have done and have the guts to face her - you apologize with everything in your being for your actions. Imagine *IF* you have a daughter or even a son - would you be like a religious extremist and throw them out of your home because they got raped and it's their fault? Put yourself *IN HER PLACE*. Or at least tell her that YOU are not good enough for her, you are not strong enough to deal with her past and be on your way. 5 -
GO get therpy, read books and make an effort to be a better human being. So you will have some respect for your future wife, this woman or some other person.