Porn's effect on women - Page 4 - Talk About Marriage
Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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post #46 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-11-2017, 04:28 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

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Women don't watch porn. They hate sex.
Sarcasm I hope?

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post #47 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-11-2017, 04:38 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

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If you think ladies today are forced into porn, you are very naive.

This is 2017. Ladies today are the same as the men. Same addictions, same jobs to pursue, etc.

I don't buy the poor ladies who were forced into porn because they are drug addicts. Really? Cliche.

You know that the porn industry is very professional today, right?

That means drug screenings, checking for STD's, you name it. They actually try and help their employees.

If my 18 year old daughter went into porn, that is her choice. She is an adult. I don't agree with that choice but it is hers to make. She is not a little baby girl and clueless child. Ladies are more mentally mature at 18 compared to us guys by many years.

Whether ladies are in porn or just at the beaches wearing tiny bikini's , thongs, etc. its the same thing. Us guys will be checking them out. 18+ years of age doesn't matter. Actually ladies are younger than 18 and are still wearing skimpy bathing suits and having sex.
Not all men do this, some don't look at porn nor ogle teenage girls in bikinis.

You have a weird idea of porn. I saw a programme a while back with women who used to be in porn films. Many of them were broken by their experiences both before and during. You don't want to see the truth because you look at porn and cant let yourself think that many of these women were victims of child abuse and exploitation.

I cant understand why anyone would think that porn has no victims.

Last edited by Diana7; 02-11-2017 at 04:53 PM.
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post #48 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-11-2017, 04:46 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

In reality, many of the women portrayed in pornographic material are runaway girls trapped in a life of slavery. Many having been sexually abused. Some of them are infected with incurable sexually transmitted diseases that are highly contagious and often die very young. Many take drugs just to cope.

Read this, it will open you eyes to what actually happens. The rampant STD's, the abuse, the drug taking.
http://www.covenanteyes.com/2008/10/...porn-industry/

Last edited by Diana7; 02-11-2017 at 04:52 PM.
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post #49 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-11-2017, 09:20 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Porn's effect on women

There is a huge range. There are highly paid professional actresses who do the work for the money and because they enjoy it. There are amateurs who are happy to be filmed having sex out of a combination of exhibitionism and wanting some money on the side. There are women who view it as an improvement over prostitution. There are women who feel they have no choice. There are women who are literally forced into porn.

It would take a careful study to see how many are in each category.



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In reality, many of the women portrayed in pornographic material are runaway girls trapped in a life of slavery. Many having been sexually abused. Some of them are infected with incurable sexually transmitted diseases that are highly contagious and often die very young. Many take drugs just to cope.

Read this, it will open you eyes to what actually happens. The rampant STD's, the abuse, the drug taking.
Ex-Porn Star Tells the Truth About the Porn Industry
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post #50 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-12-2017, 08:19 AM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

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Originally Posted by Mollymolz View Post
Sarcasm I hope?

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Mostly just being silly. Making a stereotypical comment based on MY experience and threads started by other men here. I realize there are a lot of women who are very sexual. I guess my attempt at humor is mixed with my own bitterness.

Last edited by EleGirl; 02-28-2017 at 10:29 AM. Reason: changed name on quote as account name changed
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post #51 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-12-2017, 03:43 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

Porn only presents a problem when it interferes with intimacy in the marriage. The person watching can't bring intimate energy to the marriage, or the spouse of the person watching can't accept intimate energy because they feel threatened by their spouses porn use.

So the men or women who masturbate to porn and ignore their wives or husbands are the blame. They aren't bringing their sexual energy to the marriage.

The women or men who are threatened or appalled or disgusted by their spouse watching porn and therefore refuse intimacy are ruining the marriage.

If your wife is watching porn or reading porn you need to understand the situations involved in the porn she chooses but more importantly, she needs to agree to bring her sexual energy to the marriage.

"Some women are blessed with multi-orgasmic ability for a reason and I'm damn sure not going to waste a blessing" ~FrenchFry

"Vaginas are tricky creatures." ~Lucy999
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post #52 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-12-2017, 04:01 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

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Porn only presents a problem when it interferes with intimacy in the marriage. The person watching can't bring intimate energy to the marriage, or the spouse of the person watching can't accept intimate energy because they feel threatened by their spouses porn use.

So the men or women who masturbate to porn and ignore their wives or husbands are the blame. They aren't bringing their sexual energy to the marriage.

The women or men who are threatened or appalled or disgusted by their spouse watching porn and therefore refuse intimacy are ruining the marriage.

If your wife is watching porn or reading porn you need to understand the situations involved in the porn she chooses but more importantly, she needs to agree to bring her sexual energy to the marriage.
You said 'The women or men who are threatened or appalled or disgusted by their spouse watching porn and therefore refuse intimacy are ruining the marriage'
I don't agree, its the one who is looking at porn who is causing the issues in the marriage, not the one who hates that their spouse looks at it.
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post #53 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-12-2017, 04:06 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

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You said 'The women or men who are threatened or appalled or disgusted by their spouse watching porn and therefore refuse intimacy are ruining the marriage'
I don't agree, its the one who is looking at porn who is causing the issues in the marriage, not the one who hates that their spouse looks at it.
I think you're wrong.

If you had no idea your husband watched porn every now and then...it would never affect you or your marriage...so long as you felt he was saving all his loving for you.

But once you discovered he watched porn, even if he never masturbated and never left you hanging and always made you feel loved, you would send hi out in the cold because of how you feel about porn.

"Some women are blessed with multi-orgasmic ability for a reason and I'm damn sure not going to waste a blessing" ~FrenchFry

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post #54 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-12-2017, 04:13 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

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I think you're wrong.

If you had no idea your husband watched porn every now and then...it would never affect you or your marriage...so long as you felt he was saving all his loving for you.

But once you discovered he watched porn, even if he never masturbated and never left you hanging and always made you feel loved, you would send hi out in the cold because of how you feel about porn.
I would know if he watched it. He is very honest and transparent.He is also a very moral man.
If I was married to a man who watched it I would give him a choice, me or the porn. A man who watches porn is not making his wife feel loved or respected, quite the opposite.
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post #55 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-12-2017, 04:34 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

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I would know if he watched it. He is very honest and transparent.He is also a very moral man.
If I was married to a man who watched it I would give him a choice, me or the porn. A man who watches porn is not making his wife feel loved or respected, quite the opposite.
You are skirting the essential question. If you were married to a man who, like many men, denies watching porn; think it's not a big deal because he doesn't do it very often, yet made you feel loved and respected, porn would not affect your marriage...until you found out about his rare porn viewing.

You only know what you know because all signs suggest your knowledge is true.

Moral husband, check. Honest husband, check. Transparency, check. Saves his loving for you, check. None of those behaviors, alone or all together, absolutely reject porn from reaching your husband's eyes ever. Therefore, it is possible that he has seen porn. It is also possible he sometimes sees porn, though only a few minutes when he stops by his brother's house to let the dog out maybe once a month and because your husband doesn't really consider those accidental porn views as watching, and because he saves his loving for you, you feel loved and respected.

If your husband watched and you never knew porn would never affect your marriage.
If your husband watched and rarely wanted sex, porn would affect your marriage.
If your husband watched, yet still wanted you, and you found out he watched, porn would affect your marriage.

Porn only affects a marriage when intimacy is denied, denied due to overload masturbation or denied due to spite for feeling threatened. Porn itself doesn't affect a marriage.

"Some women are blessed with multi-orgasmic ability for a reason and I'm damn sure not going to waste a blessing" ~FrenchFry

"Vaginas are tricky creatures." ~Lucy999
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post #56 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-12-2017, 04:43 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

Personally, I'm grossed out by the voyeur porn where people who are minding their own business and enjoying a slice of life are uploaded to the internet by some a-hole with a camera. You want to upload pictures of yourself having sex? Fine. Up to you. You want to turn every person who's enjoying a bit of sun and freedom into a porn spectacle? Then you're an a-hole.

I'm also grossed out by slave trade exploitation that is actually a very real part of the porn industry. Women (or men) are not things to be bought and sold and traded for sexual gratification. We're people.

But outside of that sort of exploitation, it's all just sex, and ultimately no big deal, IMHO.
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post #57 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-12-2017, 05:10 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

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Originally Posted by Anon Pink View Post
You are skirting the essential question. If you were married to a man who, like many men, denies watching porn; think it's not a big deal because he doesn't do it very often, yet made you feel loved and respected, porn would not affect your marriage...until you found out about his rare porn viewing.

You only know what you know because all signs suggest your knowledge is true.

Moral husband, check. Honest husband, check. Transparency, check. Saves his loving for you, check. None of those behaviors, alone or all together, absolutely reject porn from reaching your husband's eyes ever. Therefore, it is possible that he has seen porn. It is also possible he sometimes sees porn, though only a few minutes when he stops by his brother's house to let the dog out maybe once a month and because your husband doesn't really consider those accidental porn views as watching, and because he saves his loving for you, you feel loved and respected.

If your husband watched and you never knew porn would never affect your marriage.
If your husband watched and rarely wanted sex, porn would affect your marriage.
If your husband watched, yet still wanted you, and you found out he watched, porn would affect your marriage.

Porn only affects a marriage when intimacy is denied, denied due to overload masturbation or denied due to spite for feeling threatened. Porn itself doesn't affect a marriage.
Believe me he doesn't see it. He even closes his eyes when adverts come on with scantily dressed ladies, he did that long before we met. He is even stricter than me with these things. I love him for it.
I would never deny him sex out of spite, but I would not marry a man who thought porn was ok. Its a totally no no for both of us. It would ruin the intimacy and good sex that we have.
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post #58 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-12-2017, 05:21 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Porn's effect on women

While some is real, I suspect the great majority of "voyeur" porn is actually staged. I agree that uploading pictures / videos without someone's consent is wrong and illegal.

The slave trade part is of course completely horrible. It also mystified me - there is so much porn on the web, how can there be any money to be made in slave trade porn. I believe it exists, I just don't understand the economics.


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Originally Posted by wild jade View Post
Personally, I'm grossed out by the voyeur porn where people who are minding their own business and enjoying a slice of life are uploaded to the internet by some a-hole with a camera. You want to upload pictures of yourself having sex? Fine. Up to you. You want to turn every person who's enjoying a bit of sun and freedom into a porn spectacle? Then you're an a-hole.

I'm also grossed out by slave trade exploitation that is actually a very real part of the porn industry. Women (or men) are not things to be bought and sold and traded for sexual gratification. We're people.

But outside of that sort of exploitation, it's all just sex, and ultimately no big deal, IMHO.
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