Porn's effect on women - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 01:14 PM Thread Starter
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Porn's effect on women

There has been a lot of discussion of porn's effect on men's sex lives - everything from it providing a unrealistic and damaging idea of real sexual behaviors, to impotence and lack of desire for real world sex.

A fair number of women watch porn as well. Has anyone noticed in themselves or a partner negative effects from women's viewing of porn? Do women tend to get addicted to porn the way some men do.

**** I don't want this to be another men vs. women, who is better thread, effects of porn on men are discussed in a lot of other threads *******

The real question is whether women and their partners should be concerned about porn use in women.
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post #2 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 01:28 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

This is a really good question @uhtred as I really haven't seen this aspect of porn use being explored, at least here on TAM.

I've been an active consumer of porn since I left college round 18/19. I would view daily while on my period and often right before. I'm horniest around that time.

Although my partner is not aware of this, there were aspects on my interest in porn that created an unhealthy dynamic in our relationship. We were long distance for quite some time. This didn't happen all the time but often times I would have a video playing in the background while we would have skype sex. He'd need me to cum to feel that I was satisfied and it was difficult for me to do so by just watching him masturbate. Watching a d*** really just doesn't do much for me. I needed to watch a sex act in order to cum for him. For obvious reasons, I never shared this.
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post #3 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 01:30 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

Here is some reading on the topic.

Pornography Addiction a Growing Problem Among Women

Why more and more women are using pornography

I included that below link despite it's comments about porn being wrong because of Christian beliefs. The article brings up other issues that I think are interesting.

Women and Porn Addictions: Top 10 Things To Understand
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post #4 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 02:15 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

Quote:
Originally Posted by EleGirl View Post
Here is some reading on the topic.

Pornography Addiction a Growing Problem Among Women

Why more and more women are using pornography

I included that below link despite it's comments about porn being wrong because of Christian beliefs. The article brings up other issues that I think are interesting.

Women and Porn Addictions: Top 10 Things To Understand
Thanks for these links @EleGirl, very eye opening. I feel like I could easily have become someone who was addicted to porn as I do have addictive tendencies.

What I find interesting is that a woman's interest in watching porn does not seem to have the same damaging effect on the man. I've come across many stories on TAM about women who view their partner's use of porn as damaging and perhaps the utmost disrespect. Is that also the case for some men? If this is not the case, why?

Any women been with/know of men responding negatively to their partner viewing porn (outside of religious concerns)? How did these men feel? In what way was it hurtful to them?
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post #5 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 02:36 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

I think porn does paint a very unrealistic image to women about how quick a plumber can show up at your house ...
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post #6 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 02:38 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

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Originally Posted by Keke24 View Post
Thanks for these links @EleGirl, very eye opening. I feel like I could easily have become someone who was addicted to porn as I do have addictive tendencies.

What I find interesting is that a woman's interest in watching porn does not seem to have the same damaging effect on the man. I've come across many stories on TAM about women who view their partner's use of porn as damaging and perhaps the utmost disrespect. Is that also the case for some men? If this is not the case, why?

Any women been with/know of men responding negatively to their partner viewing porn (outside of religious concerns)? How did these men feel? In what way was it hurtful to them?
There was one poster on TAM who said that he never could understand why women were so upset about their partner/husband using a lot of porn.. until his wife started doing it. He had a huge problem with it. I do not recall the poster's name. He might still be a member here.

From my point of view, the biggest issue with porn us is two fold:
1) when it interferes with the couple's sex life--when the porn user prefers porn to sex with their partner.
2) when the porn user expects their partner to perform like the porn stars
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post #7 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 02:38 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

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Originally Posted by EllisRedding View Post
I think porn does paint a very unrealistic image to women about how quick a plumber can show up at your house ...
Really! What up with that?
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post #8 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 02:50 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

Quote:
Originally Posted by EllisRedding View Post
I think porn does paint a very unrealistic image to women about how quick a plumber can show up at your house ...
Lmao 😂😂😂

Areen
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post #9 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 03:07 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

I believe that any addiction is unhealthy for the addict as well as their loved ones. I suppose that as long as it does not become an addiction watching porn could have no negative effects in a relationship.
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post #10 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 03:34 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

Quote:
Originally Posted by uhtred View Post
There has been a lot of discussion of porn's effect on men's sex lives - everything from it providing a unrealistic and damaging idea of real sexual behaviors, to impotence and lack of desire for real world sex.

A fair number of women watch porn as well. Has anyone noticed in themselves or a partner negative effects from women's viewing of porn? Do women tend to get addicted to porn the way some men do.

**** I don't want this to be another men vs. women, who is better thread, effects of porn on men are discussed in a lot of other threads *******

The real question is whether women and their partners should be concerned about porn use in women.
Do you include both the printed word porn and the video/picture porn in your question? Both have their own damaging effect. Sorry 50 Shades but that means you too. Although some have said you "helped".

Even if I don't get likes for it, I'm still going to say it.
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post #11 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 03:46 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Porn's effect on women

I think you will find a LOT of variation, both in how it affects men, and how it affects their partners.

There is a general belief (true or not) that men are more likely to view women as sex object than are women to view men that way. That makes it more likely that someone would interpret a man's viewing of porn as fitting this negative pattern.

A biological factor is that most men can only have sex a very limited number of times per day, so watching porn may deprive their partners. Many women can have sex as often as they want. Of course this doesn't apply to the percentage of women who lose interest in sex for a significant time after they have had an O.

I would view my wife watching porn as negative if I believe it was substituting for intimacy with me. Finding out that she had turned me down for sex, then got off to a porno would make me unhappy.





Quote:
Originally Posted by Keke24 View Post
Thanks for these links @EleGirl, very eye opening. I feel like I could easily have become someone who was addicted to porn as I do have addictive tendencies.

What I find interesting is that a woman's interest in watching porn does not seem to have the same damaging effect on the man. I've come across many stories on TAM about women who view their partner's use of porn as damaging and perhaps the utmost disrespect. Is that also the case for some men? If this is not the case, why?

Any women been with/know of men responding negatively to their partner viewing porn (outside of religious concerns)? How did these men feel? In what way was it hurtful to them?
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post #12 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 03:48 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Porn's effect on women

I was thinking of video / picture hard core porn.

Written erotica / romance novels is a different but very interesting topic.


Quote:
Originally Posted by EunuchMonk View Post
Do you include both the printed word porn and the video/picture porn in your question? Both have their own damaging effect. Sorry 50 Shades but that means you too. Although some have said you "helped".
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post #13 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 04:06 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

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Originally Posted by uhtred View Post
I think you will find a LOT of variation, both in how it affects men, and how it affects their partners.

There is a general belief (true or not) that men are more likely to view women as sex object than are women to view men that way. That makes it more likely that someone would interpret a man's viewing of porn as fitting this negative pattern.

A biological factor is that most men can only have sex a very limited number of times per day, so watching porn may deprive their partners. Many women can have sex as often as they want. Of course this doesn't apply to the percentage of women who lose interest in sex for a significant time after they have had an O.

I would view my wife watching porn as negative if I believe it was substituting for intimacy with me. Finding out that she had turned me down for sex, then got off to a porno would make me unhappy.
Ahh. So if it affects intimacy then the response is similar from both genders. That makes sense.

Outside of these situations however, some women are seriously hurt by it. Often the perspective is that he'll be comparing the pornstar's body to hers in the future, he's not happy with the way she looks, he's not satisfied with her sexually etc. By just finding out their partner has viewed porn, regardless of the fact that it has no effect on their sexual intimacy. This is what I'm most interested in. In instances where a woman is not addicted, does not choose porn over husband and occasionally views porn in private. Does the male ever view it as damaging as a woman might?
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post #14 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 04:40 PM
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Re: Porn's effect on women

Quote:
Originally Posted by Keke24 View Post
Does the male ever view it as damaging as a woman might?
I think that a significant percentage of men would also develop a sense of inadequacy over their own bodies if their wives expressed a strong sense of attraction for a porn star.
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post #15 of 58 (permalink) Old 02-10-2017, 04:46 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Porn's effect on women

I believe that could be true, but it would be interesting to hear from a man who felt that way. (I don't).

Quote:
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I think that a significant percentage of men would also develop a sense of inadequacy over their own bodies if their wives expressed a strong sense of attraction for a porn star.
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