The hotwife fantasy - Page 6 - Talk About Marriage
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post #76 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 01:17 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

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Originally Posted by dsmith2017 View Post
You sound like you are into the cuckold thing. To each their own but the humiliation and some of the other stuff that goes with that isn't my thing, notice the thread tittle, "hotwife fantasy" there is a difference between that and "cuckolding" and there are extremes with everything.
If your fantasy at any point involves another man touching your wife and you deriving enjoyment from that....

Then you're a cuck. Or in this case a wannabe cuck since it hasn't happened yet.

I don't know what else to tell you. I mean if I missed something here, please enlighten me.

You can't be "a little bit of a cuckold". You either are or you're not. So which is it?

“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.” - Maya Angelou

Last edited by BetrayedDad; 02-27-2017 at 04:27 PM.
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post #77 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 01:28 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

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Originally Posted by dsmith2017 View Post
I'm trying to gain some insight/information on the subject. Anytime I search Google it's information from a porn sites, not the most reliable place for honest information.

Background
We are in our late 30's, married 16 years, together 18. Early on in our relation, not often but usually after a night of drinking, the hotwife thing would come in bed. We use to be pretty open about fantasies and curiosities but once we started a family,all that talk stopped. My wife has grown pretty conservative over the years. A few weeks ago I was restoring a friend's laptop, honestly, I wasn't snooping but I found out they have explored the fantasy. It's kicked the fantasy in overdrive for me.I'm unsure whether to attempt to tell my wife. I don't want to upset her.

I don't want to be judged. I would never force anything on anyone they were comfortable with.
Just because someone else does something doesn't man you have to. Don't let that make you discontent with your wife.
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post #78 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 02:35 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

There is a reason why the biggest forum of this kink on the internet is both cuckold and hotwife. They're effectively the same thing.

I have had hundreds of hours of counseling on this exact topic, I'm reasonably certain that I'm not off base

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post #79 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 02:47 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

Leave the fantasy alone. It never turns out the way you expect it to. Leave that can of worms unopened.

Several examples on here of a former "typical" wife really getting into the husbands fantasy then ends up looking for a male to satisfy her "fantasy" leaving her idiot husband on the sidelines trying to understand how it happened.

Be careful what you ask for, you might get it, and more that you didn't want.
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post #80 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 03:27 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

A slightly different view on why this is often a bad idea.

Some men like the idea of this event because it makes them feel powerful. They tell themselves that they control this valuable resource (their wife) and that they have the power to grant this valuable resource to other men. This is totally and completely false, and incredibly insulting to their wife. The husband in this situation has no control and no power. All the power and control belongs to his wife (as it should). He is asking her to use her power and control to provide a benefit to another man. If she does not enjoy this, the husband has asked her to do something unpleasant. Never a good idea. If she does enjoy this, she may decide to exercise her power and control to make it happen again. At which point the husband will realize (too late, and to his chagrin) that he never had the power and control in the first place.

When you can see it coming, duck!
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post #81 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 04:12 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

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Originally Posted by bandit.45 View Post
Hmmmm. I still think you are playing with fire. I think you need to find other ways to spice it up in the bedroom. Why not a little light bondage, or dress up as a high school letterman and have her dress up as a school librarian and....
Fox or rabbit.... furries....

Supporting those who want to divorce or reconcile. Not every relationship is the same.
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post #82 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 04:34 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

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Originally Posted by Holdingontoit View Post
A slightly different view on why this is often a bad idea.



Some men like the idea of this event because it makes them feel powerful. They tell themselves that they control this valuable resource (their wife) and that they have the power to grant this valuable resource to other men. This is totally and completely false, and incredibly insulting to their wife. The husband in this situation has no control and no power. All the power and control belongs to his wife (as it should). He is asking her to use her power and control to provide a benefit to another man. If she does not enjoy this, the husband has asked her to do something unpleasant. Never a good idea. If she does enjoy this, she may decide to exercise her power and control to make it happen again. At which point the husband will realize (too late, and to his chagrin) that he never had the power and control in the first place.


This is basically what happened to my friend. Power was how his kink manifested itself. He exerted power over his wife. She was objectified. Resentment grew. Communication broke down. She met a guy who was GOOD at wedging, seemed like an angel to her and even my buddy. I knew better. My buddy was like a frog boiling in water. Wife's resentment grew. My buddy now had a growing kink because he was losing power yet he kept lying to himself about how powerful he was with her continually 'returning' to him. Well, she did keep returning to him but she ceased being his wife and began being the woman he provided for and allowed her to live her life. Deep down he knew the deal and it wasn't until I was able to punch him in the face with facts that he began to see religion. It took over two years to get her away from that guy. My buddy did put his foot down then it became cheating. Used every damn hint I ever got from here, SI and real life and finally finally finally blew it up.

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post #83 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 04:49 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

I'd be VERY but VERY turned off if my SO thought of sharing me with anyone else.
Doesn't he appreciate me enough to have me only for him, exclusively?
Doesn't he feel special if I give my whole body to him and only to him?
What if I start to like the other man more than my SO?

Don't you think all of these?

It's not even my fantasy to share my SO with anyone else, let alone make it a reality.

Davelli0331: If a GNO, or alcohol, or an attractive coworker, or a past flame on FB were all that were needed for someone to cheat, then I think that person had that defect in their integrity all along. All they ever lacked was the opportunity to act on their lack of integrity and the circumstances required to rationalize it to themselves.
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post #84 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 05:18 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

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Originally Posted by Talker67 View Post
i do not recall the source, but i remember only 5% of all people getting into this lifestyle, and after 5 years, half of them got divorced. The other half, i assume, enjoyed it.

So do you really want to roll those dice? How about some nice bondage instead?
Frankly, half of all marriages end in divorce.
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post #85 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 05:33 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

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Originally Posted by *Deidre* View Post
Yea, I don't see why not. Okay. I have a recurring fantasy, and I have shared it with my fiance. He likes it, but sometimes he doesn't. My fantasy is to imagine him sleeping with his exes. lol Idk why. I don't know these past women he's dated, they're faceless in my fantasy, but I like him to tell stories about his exes. He doesn't like it sometimes, because he feels that I'm not focusing on ''us.'' Which isn't true, I am, but there's something very sexy to me about imagining him with other women. So, your wife may come back at you with ''why do you ''need'' this ...aren't I enough?'' So be ready for that question. (My fiance is SO enough, but there is something hot to me about thinking about him with other women. ONLY in fantasy, I would be heartbroken of course if he slept with other women)
Oh my gosh, this is so me! My gf is freaking hot in the bedroom. She's a kinkster who hasn't been with a ton of other women, but she's had a ton of sex with the ones she was with. One of my hottest fantasies (and yes, it's fantasy only) is of her banging her exes. And I do know their names and what they were doing together. We are both kinky and pretty frank about talking about past sex and fantasies.

She finds it a tiny bit odd that I get off on this particular thing, but she's okay with it, lol. It's not her fantasy where I'm concerned, but it's not a big deal, because we both know it's fantasy.

dsmith's wife might never be on board with this fantasy and it doesn't sound like he will push for it in that case.
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post #86 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 05:59 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

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Originally Posted by introvert View Post
Oh my gosh, this is so me! My gf is freaking hot in the bedroom. She's a kinkster who hasn't been with a ton of other women, but she's had a ton of sex with the ones she was with. One of my hottest fantasies (and yes, it's fantasy only) is of her banging her exes. And I do know their names and what they were doing together. We are both kinky and pretty frank about talking about past sex and fantasies.

She finds it a tiny bit odd that I get off on this particular thing, but she's okay with it, lol. It's not her fantasy where I'm concerned, but it's not a big deal, because we both know it's fantasy.

dsmith's wife might never be on board with this fantasy and it doesn't sound like he will push for it in that case.
Is it weird that I ''liked'' your comment? LOL

Glad I'm not alone in this fetish, I think? lol

Sometimes, you fall in love with the most unexpected person, at the most unexpected time. ~ Unknown
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post #87 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 07:03 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

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Is it weird that I ''liked'' your comment? LOL

Glad I'm not alone in this fetish, I think? lol
Isn't there a quote in the bible that says there is nothing new under the sun? LOL!

You are definitely not alone...
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post #88 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 08:06 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

The Bible and this conversation...hmmm....lol

Sometimes, you fall in love with the most unexpected person, at the most unexpected time. ~ Unknown
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post #89 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 08:19 PM
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Re: The hotwife fantasy

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The Bible and this conversation...hmmm....lol
I know, I couldn't help myself!
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post #90 of 125 (permalink) Old 02-27-2017, 10:30 PM
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Smile Re: The hotwife fantasy

As long as you both feel ok about this then it can become the most satisfying and fulfilling lifestyle imaginable. It is extremely important that neither of you are in the slightest way jealous however. Otherwise you can both have so much fun in this lifestyle.

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