morning after charity sex - Page 2 - Talk About Marriage
Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

User Tag List

 45Likes
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
post #16 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-09-2017, 02:38 AM
Member
 
TaDor's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: USA
Posts: 1,103
Re: morning after charity sex

Bad sex is not worth the time. I would offer to teach or show the woman how to do things within a night or two if they are inexperienced (going downtown on them) and if there is no improvement - buh bye.

But yeah, even a particularly bad sex partner - I decided to FAKE it. I had to think of sex with past women to keep things "up" - then went into fake climax mode because even that wasn't working. I thanked her... she went away happy - no reason to hurt her feelings. It was always going to be an ONS thing. If it was a relationship woman, then I wouldn't have done that.

Supporting those who want to divorce or reconcile. Not every relationship is the same.
TaDor is online now  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #17 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-09-2017, 04:06 AM
Member
 
Satya's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 2,229
Re: morning after charity sex

I always thank my husband when I'm the pursuer.

He thanks me by cuddling me tightly while spooning, as he falls asleep.

I don't do obligation sex, although sure, I have days when my mind is preoccupied on other things. I try to re-focus on what's important.

"If you deliberately plan on being less than you are capable of being, then I warn you that you'll be unhappy for the rest of your life."

~ Abraham Maslow
Satya is offline  
post #18 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-11-2017, 05:16 AM Thread Starter
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 253
Quote:
Originally Posted by Anon Pink View Post

G, are you still trying to find the right combination of tricks to get her to happily have sex with you?

yes and it sucks. i am assuming if i stop initiating it will just sliwly fade away.
Gseries is offline  
post #19 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 02:44 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Posts: 104
Re: morning after charity sex

Quote:
Originally Posted by #62 View Post
Years of obligatory Saturday AM sex has got me down, might as well set an alarm. No apology necessary, no eye contact either, its awful.

I remember one hand job in particular she was watching TV not even paying attention then she asks me
"Oh did you cum"? BAwhahaha yep its that bad.
Oh my, this image makes me so sad for you!

In all fairness, do you "do" things for her in which you have one eye on the hockey game? As a woman, that's ****ing frustrating. It doesn't even have to be sexual... My husband has this annoying habit of doing things to "please" me when it's clear he doesn't want to do them. His attention will be scattered. Then stay at home and I'll do it my damn self.

Sometimes, the same thing goes for us and sex. At least she gave you a hand job...
UnicornCupcake is offline  
post #20 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-15-2017, 03:05 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 29
Re: morning after charity sex

I didn't thank women.

But I always told them how wonderful they were, how beautiful they were, and how fantastically lucky I was to get the chance to have sex with them.

Always, and often.

William
WilliamM is offline  
post #21 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-15-2017, 04:14 PM
Member
 
Holdingontoit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: In the woods
Posts: 1,202
Re: morning after charity sex

Quote:
Originally Posted by WilliamM View Post
I didn't thank women.

But I always told them how wonderful they were, how beautiful they were, and how fantastically lucky I was to get the chance to have sex with them.

Always, and often.
Just shows "different strokes for different folks". I did that for my wife. She felt it was a sign of weakness and lost respect for me. So did another woman I dated a few of times. Not every woman likes being complimented effusively. That is OK, there are plenty of non-communicative men out there for those women.

When you can see it coming, duck!
Holdingontoit is offline  
post #22 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-15-2017, 04:46 PM
Member
 
Mr. Nail's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Western US
Posts: 2,359
Re: morning after charity sex

Things I thought while reading through this.
Why wait until the next morning? Unless it was so fantastic you passed out.
It is actually kind of fun to have the power to say no. You should try it.
Mr. Nail is offline  
post #23 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-15-2017, 05:03 PM
Registered User
 
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 29
Re: morning after charity sex

My wife said; when said from a position of power compliments are received as genuine, and cannot possibly demean the man giving them.

I am merely the messenger of her message. I suspect her message means she believes who is delivering the compliment matters a great deal.

I have never had any issue with a woman perceiving me as weak, or loosing respect for me.

Be well
WilliamM is offline  
post #24 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-15-2017, 05:57 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 1,510
Re: morning after charity sex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Holdingontoit View Post
Just shows "different strokes for different folks". I did that for my wife. She felt it was a sign of weakness and lost respect for me. So did another woman I dated a few of times. Not every woman likes being complimented effusively. That is OK, there are plenty of non-communicative men out there for those women.
I talk to my wife all of the time, yet thanking her for sex would feel weird so I don't do it. Plus she is also no fan of being complimented effusively.

I really can't see any point in ever thanking any of my sexual partners for sex, since they also get the same feel good experience from that sex as well.

At the same time though, my wife and I do mention our sexual experiences, so I might say "keep going", "stop", "that feels good", "that felt great" or "that didn't work".

On the other hand, my wife and I do thank each other for cooking, gift giving, holding the door, carrying something and on and on etc.

That said I can't imagine why anyone would need or want an apology for sharing sex.
Personal is online now  
post #25 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-15-2017, 06:28 PM
Member
 
frusdil's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Posts: 1,857
Re: morning after charity sex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolf1974 View Post
It is funny isn't it how some choose to live their lives? Obligation sex, sexless, no oral, no desire, having to thank for sex or an apology? I knew these things existed before tam but didn't know people tolerated this much. The apology is a new one lol
I chuckled at that too...I mean seriously just wtf? Lol.
frusdil is offline  
post #26 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-15-2017, 06:52 PM
Member
 
DustyDog's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2016
Location: Edging slowly closer to the frozen tundra
Posts: 343
Re: morning after charity sex

"give it up"? Doesn't sound like love-making, it sounds like deal-making. Is this a personal relationship or a business contract?

There are three kinds of business. Your business, my business and God's business. Whose business are you in? -Byron Katie
DustyDog is offline  
post #27 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-16-2017, 08:47 AM
Member
 
Holdingontoit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: In the woods
Posts: 1,202
Re: morning after charity sex

For some of us, sex has always been a business contract. Getting married makes it less explicit. Some of us like it that way. On both sides.

When you can see it coming, duck!
Holdingontoit is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on Talk About Marriage, you must first register. Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

Important! Your username will be visible to the public next to anything you post and could show up in search engines like Google. If you are concerned about anonymity, PLEASE choose a username that will not be recognizable to anyone you know.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
What has helped badsanta fix his LD/HD situation badsanta Sex in Marriage 107 03-15-2017 12:10 AM
Is Sex The "Bottom Line"? Vega Sex in Marriage 1356 03-08-2017 08:15 AM
Different sex drives Spicy General Relationship Discussion 25 06-29-2016 11:11 PM
Lack of sex and intimacy Raveslave Sex in Marriage 18 03-10-2016 07:10 PM
What to do? Ray83 Sex in Marriage 32 12-31-2015 09:44 AM

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome