Re: Oral sex and foreplay
Yes, on a number of occasions I have asked her what the objection was. If she responded at all, I'd get a terse answer: "your hands are dirty" or "you'll cut me". Oddly, I get the dirty hands answer even in the shower. Mistakenly, I thought over time she would get over this. For instance, I thought being gentle and understanding along with her willingness to allow me to pleasure her in a way that I find highly erotic we could get past this. That has not been the case.
Her unwillingness to talk about or even work on this is creating a wedge in the relationship, at least on my part. Furthermore, I find this extremely frustrating since I have done many things for her (related to sex and otherwise) to make her happy. She will not talk to therapist about this, with or without me there.
One person mentioned sexual molestation in the past. Yes, anything is possible, but I highly doubt it.