Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots? - Page 4 - Talk About Marriage
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post #46 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 04:35 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

If the woman I was with got off on that stuff and asked me to do it for her, I would. I would do it to satisfy her kink, because that is what a generous lover does. But I don't crave any of that stuff myself. I like cumming inside my partner, because it makes me feel like I've planted my flag so to speak. Now, I do like it when a woman gives me a BJ and swallows. That's pretty hot.... but again, I don't require it.
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post #47 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 04:59 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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Originally Posted by EleGirl View Post
It could go further than lack of trust of his honesty. It might just be that the OP does not accept her husband for who he is and wants to make him into the man that she really wants.
I hope this isn't subconsciously what I'm doing, I really do.

TBH, the main reason I married him is because he's simple. I don't expect much excitement, but the trade off is he's very reliable and a fantastic provider. His expectations out of life are easy.

I had my share of intense relationships and they were fun, but as someone planning to have a child I value consistency over intensity. I didn't want to be a sex slave or victim of my emotions from a dramatic relationship, but it still nags at me sometimes that his inner man's man wants to come out and play...
My nagging thoughts actually affect other areas in our life, not just sex. Right now, he's visiting his dad and I can't help but wonder why the **** he does this every Sunday while I visit my mom. In my case, my mother and I cook, play games, I help her with things around the house, we have shared interests, etc., but him and his father will literally sit there in silence. I wonder, is he that simple? Is that his version of quality time? I can't stand visiting his family because I get bored to tears, but he seems to enjoy it. He always has. He's been consistent, but these nagging thoughts... Is that actually what he's doing or is this when he texts other women? Makes plan for a different life?

I think this is one of those things in which I'm OK with the "deal" 99% of the time, but there are times in which I have regrets, issues, desires, etc.
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post #48 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 05:15 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

You need to believe what your husband tells you. Not all men are into the same things as not all woman are in to the same thing. What you see in porn is not the "bible" of what men expect woman to be or act like. Any man or woman that looks to porn for ideas or a base as which to judge the sexual relationship he/she has with his/her partner is denying themselves and their partner the intense intimacy and bonding experince that you get by creating a healthy sex life, and exploring each other's like's and dislikes while mapping each other's body to find what gives each other pleasure. You can't recreate porn, but you can make your own.

My husband does not like idea of giving a facial. He want to cum inside me and has no desire to cum on my face or anywhere else on my body. He has told me that he find it degrading to woman and the he loves me and respects me as his wife and mother of his children. Even if I wanted him to do that I don't think he could as it's not the kind of man he is. I respect that and frankly feel blessed to have a man that views me in such a positive light.

If your husband is a decent guy that loves you are you really going to make this a big issue? At the end of the day why does it matter what you might think men in general want, it only matters what your husband wants. Trust me this is not an issue you want to push, I wanted my husband to be more verbal and aggresive in bed, but after useless arguing I have reliazed that i can't force him to be something he is not comfortable being or doing and frankly the way he is that maybe prevents him from being that way are the very things I fell in love with him to begin with.

Don't pressure your husband about these things cause you think he's lying to you and really wants them, cause he is probably telling you the truth. If these are things you really want than you have to decide if he cant give them to you Is it worth breaking up your marriage, but be careful before making hasty decision. Wishing you all the best.
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post #49 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 05:31 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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Originally Posted by UnicornCupcake View Post
My husband and I have always had pretty normal and tame sexual appetites and up until recently I wasn't bothered by it. Lately, however, our sex life just seems so stale and boring.

He's never asked to give me a facial, anal or cum shot, but I don't mind any of these things too much so I figured that would be a good way to spice things up, right? Wrong. He doesn't seem interested in any of them and I confess it's making my feel extremely unattractive and undesirable.

I always thought men liked to do these things and I'm a little paranoid that he DOES want to do these things, just not wit me. I mean, how many men DON'T want to give a money shot now and then? What is it about me that makes the idea of these things so unappealing?

After months of playfully telling him to stick it in my ass we had a few failed (but fun attempts) at anal. I don't detest it, but I need to be drunk for it to be enjoyable and successful. I'm not saying I need to be drunk to have sex with my husband. No. But when I'm all done up and we've had a night out I tend to be in the mood more and I think that's a fair assessment for most women.

I hope we're not experiencing that Madonna/***** complex in which the thought of cuming on my face turns him off, but on some twentysomething it's appealing because I'm his wife and she's of no importance. Maybe that's a stretch, I don't know... His response and lack of interest just doesn't seem normal. I don't think he's cheating, but I think he's just a man... And men want these things, don't they?

Do any of you NOT like to do these things? If so, why?
My husband and I have a great marriage and great sex life but neither has any interest in anal sex or the other things you mentioned. I cant see what the attraction is, cant think of much worse than a penis being put there, what with the pain and the mess, when there is a great place perfectly designed for the penis already.

Dont assume that all men want those things, they dont. Its so sad that you are even thinking he may be cheating because of this
He is a normal man with his own likes and dislikes, whats wrong with that?
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post #50 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 05:32 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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Originally Posted by UnicornCupcake View Post

Quote:
Originally Posted by EleGirl View Post
It could go further than lack of trust of his honesty. It might just be that the OP does not accept her husband for who he is and wants to make him into the man that she really wants.
I hope this isn't subconsciously what I'm doing, I really do.

TBH, the main reason I married him is because he's simple. I don't expect much excitement, but the trade off is he's very reliable and a fantastic provider. His expectations out of life are easy.

I had my share of intense relationships and they were fun, but as someone planning to have a child I value consistency over intensity. I didn't want to be a sex slave or victim of my emotions from a dramatic relationship, but it still nags at me sometimes that his inner man's man wants to come out and play...

My nagging thoughts actually affect other areas in our life, not just sex. Right now, he's visiting his dad and I can't help but wonder why the **** he does this every Sunday while I visit my mom. In my case, my mother and I cook, play games, I help her with things around the house, we have shared interests, etc., but him and his father will literally sit there in silence. I wonder, is he that simple? Is that his version of quality time? I can't stand visiting his family because I get bored to tears, but he seems to enjoy it. He always has. He's been consistent, but these nagging thoughts... Is that actually what he's doing or is this when he texts other women? Makes plan for a different life?

I think this is one of those things in which I'm OK with the "deal" 99% of the time, but there are times in which I have regrets, issues, desires, etc.
It does sound like you are trying to make him into someone that you want him to be.

And you flat out do not trust him. Why is that? Have you found evidence of him texting other women?

And it sounds like sexually the two of you are not compatible.

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post #51 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 05:37 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Daisy12 View Post
You need to believe what your husband tells you. Not all men are into the same things as not all woman are in to the same thing. What you see in porn is not the "bible" of what men expect woman to be or act like. Any man or woman that looks to porn for ideas or a base as which to judge the sexual relationship he/she has with his/her partner is denying themselves and their partner the intense intimacy and bonding experince that you get by creating a healthy sex life, and exploring each other's like's and dislikes while mapping each other's body to find what gives each other pleasure. You can't recreate porn, but you can make your own.

My husband does not like idea of giving a facial. He want to cum inside me and has no desire to cum on my face or anywhere else on my body. He has told me that he find it degrading to woman and the he loves me and respects me as his wife and mother of his children. Even if I wanted him to do that I don't think he could as it's not the kind of man he is. I respect that and frankly feel blessed to have a man that views me in such a positive light.

If your husband is a decent guy that loves you are you really going to make this a big issue? At the end of the day why does it matter what you might think men in general want, it only matters what your husband wants. Trust me this is not an issue you want to push, I wanted my husband to be more verbal and aggresive in bed, but after useless arguing I have reliazed that i can't force him to be something he is not comfortable being or doing and frankly the way he is that maybe prevents him from being that way are the very things I fell in love with him to begin with.

Don't pressure your husband about these things cause you think he's lying to you and really wants them, cause he is probably telling you the truth. If these are things you really want than you have to decide if he cant give them to you Is it worth breaking up your marriage, but be careful before making hasty decision. Wishing you all the best.
You sound as if you have a good husband who loves and respects you. I have one of them as well, its awesome. He never looks at porn for the same reason, out of love and respect for me.
I honestly think that the prolific use of porn today gives people such unrealistic and wrong and skewed ideas of what men and women like and of what a normal healthy relationship looks like.
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post #52 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 05:37 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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Originally Posted by UnicornCupcake View Post
I hope this isn't subconsciously what I'm doing, I really do.

TBH, the main reason I married him is because he's simple. I don't expect much excitement, but the trade off is he's very reliable and a fantastic provider. His expectations out of life are easy.

I had my share of intense relationships and they were fun, but as someone planning to have a child I value consistency over intensity. I didn't want to be a sex slave or victim of my emotions from a dramatic relationship, but it still nags at me sometimes that his inner man's man wants to come out and play...
My nagging thoughts actually affect other areas in our life, not just sex. Right now, he's visiting his dad and I can't help but wonder why the **** he does this every Sunday while I visit my mom. In my case, my mother and I cook, play games, I help her with things around the house, we have shared interests, etc., but him and his father will literally sit there in silence. I wonder, is he that simple? Is that his version of quality time? I can't stand visiting his family because I get bored to tears, but he seems to enjoy it. He always has. He's been consistent, but these nagging thoughts... Is that actually what he's doing or is this when he texts other women? Makes plan for a different life?

I think this is one of those things in which I'm OK with the "deal" 99% of the time, but there are times in which I have regrets, issues, desires, etc.
You do realise that the time he spends with his Dad is also giving him a break from you.Just saying.
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post #53 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 05:41 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

I actually haven't found any evidence. Or real suspicions of cheating. I don't quite know where this paranoia is coming from. Boredom, perhaps? I just find our every day live so mundane right now. I'd never cheat because I pride myself on willpower and not being impulsive in this area or any other area, but if I'm this bored I imagine he is, too. He's not as... Tough as I am when it comes to restraint (finances, bad habits, etc.) so I guess I just think he'll go do what men do. I'm just worried as a man, he'll act on his boredom. TBH, I have little faith in men as a gender concerning cheating. I guess I just expect it will eventually happen to me and I'm just wondering if these circumstances are a good breeding ground for it. Maybe I should read stories about women cheating to balance out my thinking because I know it occurs with both genders.
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post #54 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 05:45 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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You do realise that the time he spends with his Dad is also giving him a break from you.Just saying.
Absolutely and it infuriates me he'd rather sit and smoke with a depressed old man in utter silence while they play games on their phones than spend time with his wife. It makes me bitter and unlikable. It actually makes me not want to be around him and is a big reason we are apart every Sunday. We used to trade off, but now I'd rather he go do what he wants to do.
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post #55 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 05:45 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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My husband and I have a great marriage and great sex life but neither has any interest in anal sex or the other things you mentioned. I cant see what the attraction is, cant think of much worse than a penis being put there, what with the pain and the mess, when there is a great place perfectly designed for the penis already.
So you don't suck on him either, I guess.

Ignorance is bliss.
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post #56 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 05:46 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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The reason I say he is more LD, is because if he was HD adventurous, he would be into those things and usually in the mood and with you. I am HD adventurous and those activities and more do interest me, were as my wife is like your hubby.

There has to be a reason why he isn't into you.

Health? Size? There has to be a reason.

To me, those aren't odd sexual activities. They are fun and spice it up.

He is conservative, almost boring and doesn't want to do anything fun and spicy. Sounds like he doesn't want sex much to begin with. Maybe he has sex to keep the marriage going?

Or is he a secret porn addict all this time?
Not all men like those things, there is nothing wrong with them. You seem to be assuming that all men are the same as you. We have a great sex life, we dont need to do those things to enjoy it. My husband says that anal sex is a real turn off, and I agree with him.
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post #57 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 05:50 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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So you don't suck on him either, I guess.

Ignorance is bliss.
This is what I'm terrified of..

"I don't need to have my **** sucked, darling.."

*Pays for it*
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post #58 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 05:51 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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I don't think he IS LD. IF I could check his porn history (although he insists he doesn't watch it) I'm confident he'd search the stuff I'm talking about.
I feel like he does want to... I Just don't believe a 30 year old man doesn't... It's like he doesn't want to do it with me..

He IS a pretty low key. conservative almost boring individual, though. He always has been. It's starting to become an issue NOW and I don't know why...
No many men dont like those things, you are making so many wrong assumptions about men and about what you FEEL he must like and want. Just accept him as he is, that's the man you married. He sounds like a good man, don't let yourself become discontent by what porn makes you believe.
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post #59 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 05:57 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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This is what I'm terrified of..

"I don't need to have my **** sucked, darling.."

*Pays for it*
OK ...the 't' word that we are not allowed to mention is on the tip of my tongue. Are you having a giraffe?
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post #60 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 06:04 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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I actually haven't found any evidence. Or real suspicions of cheating. I don't quite know where this paranoia is coming from. Boredom, perhaps? I just find our every day live so mundane right now. I'd never cheat because I pride myself on willpower and not being impulsive in this area or any other area, but if I'm this bored I imagine he is, too. He's not as... Tough as I am when it comes to restraint (finances, bad habits, etc.) so I guess I just think he'll go do what men do. I'm just worried as a man, he'll act on his boredom. TBH, I have little faith in men as a gender concerning cheating. I guess I just expect it will eventually happen to me and I'm just wondering if these circumstances are a good breeding ground for it. Maybe I should read stories about women cheating to balance out my thinking because I know it occurs with both genders.
UC, you do know why you are paranoid. And the rest of the part in bold actually hints at it. You are making assumptions about him, based on past experiences. You are assuming that he is bored with you, based on OTHER men's actions in the past. What we, most if us anyway, are trying to tell you, is that your husband is not all those other men you have known. Not all men behave as they did. Their actions, as well as their words, cloud your judgment of your husband. You have known men who cheated on their wives, and claimed they had good marriages. But, you can't see that not all men are like that. And, I'm sorry, but if their marriages were great, they wouldn't have cheated. Even if the marriages are not great, many men CHOOSE not to cheat. This is why we keep telling you that you really can't BASE your husband's preferences and choices on that of "all men".

Even with ALL the disagreements between @CuddleBug and myself, the one thing that stood out to me, in all his lamenting about his wife's sex drive, is that he has not sought action elsewhere. That is one thing I actually DO like about CB! (See, CB? I can be agreeable. &#128539

You are basing your mistrust of your husband, and what you think he really does and does not want, on the actions of men you have known in the past. Don't you see how destructive that is to your marriage?? PLEASE, tell him all of it. And, please, get into counselling for this. You cannot build a marriage up when you do not trust your spouse.

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