Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots? - Page 5 - Talk About Marriage
Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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post #61 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 06:05 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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I actually haven't found any evidence. Or real suspicions of cheating. I don't quite know where this paranoia is coming from. Boredom, perhaps? I just find our every day live so mundane right now. I'd never cheat because I pride myself on willpower and not being impulsive in this area or any other area, but if I'm this bored I imagine he is, too. He's not as... Tough as I am when it comes to restraint (finances, bad habits, etc.) so I guess I just think he'll go do what men do. I'm just worried as a man, he'll act on his boredom. TBH, I have little faith in men as a gender concerning cheating. I guess I just expect it will eventually happen to me and I'm just wondering if these circumstances are a good breeding ground for it. Maybe I should read stories about women cheating to balance out my thinking because I know it occurs with both genders.
These days, women cheat at about the same rate that men cheat. Keep in mind that for a man to cheat, there has to be a woman involved with him. Sure some of those women are single. But a good number are married.

How often do you and your husband have sex?
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post #62 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 06:06 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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Absolutely and it infuriates me he'd rather sit and smoke with a depressed old man in utter silence while they play games on their phones than spend time with his wife. It makes me bitter and unlikable. It actually makes me not want to be around him and is a big reason we are apart every Sunday. We used to trade off, but now I'd rather he go do what he wants to do.
How many hours a week do you and your husband spend together?
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post #63 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 06:14 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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Absolutely and it infuriates me he'd rather sit and smoke with a depressed old man in utter silence while they play games on their phones than spend time with his wife. It makes me bitter and unlikable. It actually makes me not want to be around him and is a big reason we are apart every Sunday. We used to trade off, but now I'd rather he go do what he wants to do.
But... You spend that time with your mom, doing things you two enjoy, right? Sometimes, just sitting in silence is enough for some people. I know it can be infuriating, when you are one who wants to *do* something. I can't even count how many times I have just sat in my dad's van with him, in silence. He was reading, I was playing a game. We had to wait for my son to get out of band practice those days, so there was a purpose. But even when he has come to my house, he will watch TV without meaningful conversation. The important thing is spending time together, even if not what others feel is meaningful.

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post #64 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 06:16 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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How many hours a week do you and your husband spend together?
We have sex about 2-3x/week.
We actually spend a lot of time together. I'm starting to think it's too much and we're enjoying each other less because it's the same damn thing.
We play soccer together once/week, we go on mini vacations every 3 months (out of town stays, shows, etc.). The only days we're apart is Sundays, but we spend the morning cleaning together.

Maybe I'm just being paranoid and making something out of nothing. Maybe I need to spend time with other people maybe we both do
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post #65 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 06:17 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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This is what I'm terrified of..

"I don't need to have my **** sucked, darling.."

*Pays for it*
And this is the problem. You think he wants things, even though he says he doesn't, and will pay for them rather than do them with you. This is you, not him, UC.

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post #66 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 06:19 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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But... You spend that time with your mom, doing thibgs you two enjoy, right? Sometimes, just sitting in silence is enough for some people. I know it can be infuriating, when you are one who wants to *do* something. I can't even count how many times I have just sat in my dad's van with him, in silence. He was reading, I was playing a game. We had to wait for my son to get out of band practice those days, so there was a purpose. But even when he has come to my house, he will watch TV without meaningful conversation. The important thing is spending time together, even if not what others feel is meaningful.

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I do need to accept that some people enjoy a different type of company than I do. I'm TRYING, I just don't... get it. It's like choosing tofu when you can have steak. Sitting there in ****ign silence. Do they have nothing better to do? Nothing exciting going on in their lives to talk about? Are they that co dependent that they need each other to physically be there? I just see too many negative things in this type of dynamic. I couldn't do what you and your dad do... I'd probably walk the ground and wait for my kid. I'd feel like a completel blob just sitting there.
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post #67 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 06:22 PM
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Anal is not something I have ever wanted to do. Don't like the idea of it at a all. Facials and cum shots ( aren't they kind of the same thing ?) Yes please!
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post #68 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 06:23 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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I do need to accept that some people enjoy a different type of company than I do. I'm TRYING, I just don't... get it. It's like choosing tofu when you can have steak. Sitting there in ****ign silence. Do they have nothing better to do? Nothing exciting going on in their lives to talk about? Are they that co dependent that they need each other to physically be there? I just see too many negative things in this type of dynamic. I couldn't do what you and your dad do... I'd probably walk the ground and wait for my kid. I'd feel like a completel blob just sitting there.
It is not co-dependency that would cause them to just need each other to physically be there.

Ok, so it is you who could not just sit there quietly. But that is you. Why do you have such a hard time accepting your husband for who he is?

It sounds like you just don't like a lot of things about your husband. Do you tell him that you feel this way about him?
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post #69 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 06:28 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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I do need to accept that some people enjoy a different type of company than I do. I'm TRYING, I just don't... get it. It's like choosing tofu when you can have steak. Sitting there in ****ign silence. Do they have nothing better to do? Nothing exciting going on in their lives to talk about? Are they that co dependent that they need each other to physically be there? I just see too many negative things in this type of dynamic. I couldn't do what you and your dad do... I'd probably walk the ground and wait for my kid. I'd feel like a completel blob just sitting there.
Sitting with his dad for a few hours a week doesn't make him/them codependent lol. As for my dad and me, both have physical limitations, so walking the grounds would not be possible. Walking on uneven ground, lime at the high school, is a no go for dad. Now, this wasn't how we spent EVERY day/evening of matching band practice. Sometimes, we would do a little shopping. But we talk nearly everyday, whether on the phone or just texting/messaging. So a couple hours of virtually no talking isn't bad for us.

Oh, and your example of tofu vs steak? Lol I would choose the tofu. I prefer vegetarian options over meat. 😂

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post #70 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 06:56 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

This thread has moved quickly. To the original question, different people like different things, and it isn't that some are more "extreme" than others, just different tastes.

I don't like facials, my wife is neutral on that. I do like anal, and when its not uncomfortable my wife really enjoys it, but we very rarely do it anymore. I like to finish in her mouth, don't care if she swallows, but she recently told me she thought that was disgusting and degrading and will never do it again. I'd be fine with spanking either, way, but she isn't. She occasionally finds in fun to tie me up.

As long as a couple can settle on things that they both enjoy, its all good. If one really wants something the other is unwilling to do, then there are problems that need to be worked out.
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post #71 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 06:59 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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Maybe we should swap spouses?
I normally like your posts, until reading this. Ugh.

I hope my fiance never tells another woman this, someday.
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post #72 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 07:04 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

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I normally like your posts, until reading this. Ugh.

I hope my fiance never tells another woman this, someday.


And you know I was joking, right? My silly grin.....

I haven't swapped my wife for another in 17+ years, why now?

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post #73 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 07:06 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

Guys, in sum, I think I'm just being a butt head. A whiny, entitled, bored butt head who's looking for problems because things aren't 100% the way I (and I stress the I - not us) want them.
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post #74 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 07:31 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

Only tried anal once with old GF but wasn't successful (this was in a night when we went all over her house having sex). Wife has always refused anal (of course, she's ND, but that's another story).

Once early in our relationship wife was giving me a HJ and I shot it all over her chest. That would never happen today as she'd be grossed out.
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post #75 of 204 (permalink) Old 03-12-2017, 07:52 PM
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Re: Do any men NOT enjoy facials, anal and cum shots?

A couple of things here that you need to know. Men (not all, of course) like quiet, and quality time can mean just being there. My teen daughters cannot comprehend this. If we are driving, sometimes I just want to sit and think and just enjoy being there with them. No words need to be said. But, if there is quiet for even 5 minutes, I'm accused of being "too quiet" or "grumpy". I'll be asked what I'm thinking about or why I'm being so quiet. I'm just enjoying being there!

If he and his dad are similar, then they both enjoy it. There's no need to yap it up. As someone who's dad and mom are both dead, believe me when I applaud your husband for doing this with his dad. Same for you and your parents.

I realize it's kind of a cheesy sitcom, but watch the tv show called "The Middle" sometime. Mike Heck has a way of summing this up so nicely sometimes. I relate to him so well!

Okay, on to issue #2. You often hear of women being attracted to "bad boys" and doing kinky things, but they marry the safe guys who they aren't really as attracted to. I really get that vibe from you. It's like you settled for your husband but you yearn for more. It's a perfect storm for cheating. You said earlier you would never cheat, but I worry you really are setting yourself up for it.

Here's what I would recommend... Actually TALK to your husband. Tell him you worry your sex life is becoming too predictable and that you want it to be fun for both of you. Ask him to tell you his fantasies. Don't judge him for them. And, don't assume that his fantasy is somethong he would want to act on. If he says he has a fantasy of you having sex with other men, don't take that as him wanting you to have sex with other men. It's just fantasy. Ask him if there are things he would like to try. Here are some ideas to start:

Sexual massages
Light bondage
Mutual masturbation
Sex toys (for both of you)
Anal play (fingers or toys)
Edging
Blindfolds
Sex in public
Role playing
Etc.


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