Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know? - Page 3 - Talk About Marriage
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post #31 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-24-2017, 10:50 AM
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

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Originally Posted by soccermom2three View Post
Is it really a genuine fantasy? For a few maybe but my opinion is the rise of this new fetish it's just an escalation from a porn addiction. A few years ago an old TAM member made the case for this and I wish I could remember his name or saved his post. Basically a porn addict needs more and more dopamine as the porn gets more boring and mundane to the point where the wants to watch sex in person instead of on a computer screen. I don't think he necessarily wants to see his wife have sex with another man, he just wants to see live sex. His addiction has taken over common sense.
Most of this cuckolding/hot-wife craze had been generated by the porn industry and the plethora of hosting sites. This new perversion was injected into our society by an industry that is out to do one thing: make money. It is not a product of any kind of natural social evolution.
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post #32 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-24-2017, 10:51 AM
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

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Most of this cuckolding/hot-wife craze had been generated by the porn industry and the plethora of hosting sites. This new perversion was injected into our society by an industry that is out to do one thing: make money. It is not a product of any kind of natural social evolution.


It's the other way around. Porn caters to people's fantasies. Those fantasies have been around since people had brains.


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post #33 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-24-2017, 11:08 AM
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

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It's the other way around. Porn caters to people's fantasies. Those fantasies have been around since people had brains.


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I cannot agree. This is a new and incipient behavior. Prior to this men cloistered their women to keep them from being taken by other men. In some societies this is still the case.

When a young male lion chases off an old male and takes his pride of females, the first thing he does is he kills the babies from the old male. This is to stop the old male's genetic line cold, and ensure that only his progeny and genetic line goes forward.

There is no evolutionary explanation for endorsed cuckoldry. Unendorsed cucklodry yes, but men are programmed to drive off other males.

I am anyway. I'm a jealous S.O.B. That is why the TAM ladies look askance at me. I'm a caveman.
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post #34 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-24-2017, 12:24 PM
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

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This is what I have heard is a natural biological reaction. The husband in effect puts the other man ahead of him in the social order and the wife can't help but respect him less. Like many men, I have the fantasy, but I know that to indulge it would irrevocably change how she saw me forever.
This is such an interesting perspective on why a woman would think less of her husband after the act.

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post #35 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-24-2017, 12:46 PM
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

I've never wanted to watch my wife with another man, and she's never wanted to watch me with another woman. The voyeur or cuckold/cuckquean thing has no appeal for us.

Love is an ideal thing; marriage is a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

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post #36 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-24-2017, 01:11 PM
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

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This is what I have heard is a natural biological reaction. The husband in effect puts the other man ahead of him in the social order and the wife can't help but respect him less. Like many men, I have the fantasy, but I know that to indulge it would irrevocably change how she saw me forever.
Maybe that's the way it is with animals, not necessarily humans.

"I've paid double for every transgression I've ever made and that motel and that boat are little to ask for"
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post #37 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-24-2017, 02:00 PM
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

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I have been surprised by the (seemingly) large number of posts that have come up lately about wife-watching , open or cuckold relationships. Especially on this site where the majority or posters are very clear and vocal on their opinions on this topic.

However, these posts are still getting some responses so my question is; if you have a fantasy of watching your spouse or imagining her with someone else is this something you have shared? How did you share it and what was the response?

If you are a spouse and had your partner share this fantasy with you, how did you respond? Did you think this very bizarre or did your think less of him as a result?

Thanks,
Reece
Sounds like you want to broach the topic with your spouse, but in a way that might not destroy your marriage or turn your partner off.

If so, you might want to listen to the following TED topic as a way to explore Monomomish, or using extra marital sexual stimulation but in thought not action. Then maybe later talk but not touch. And even touch with nothing the violates marital vows.

Skip to the 10 minute mark to find out what she is talking about in how to have a FMF fantasy. It would also work for MFM.

This talk is a good example of how to explore a fantasy, but to keep it fantasy and not real.

As to bringing the topic up with your spouse talk to them about role playing and then show them this TED talk.

Good luck.
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post #38 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-24-2017, 02:18 PM
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

That O'Reilly chick works for the Playboy Network doesn't she? I saw her on a talk show. She used to be a porn actress I believe.

Yeah....she's somebody I want to go to for advice on my marriage.
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post #39 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-24-2017, 04:58 PM
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

...

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post #40 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-28-2017, 11:31 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

Thanks for all the feedback.

I have spoken to my wife about this. We both know its just a fantasy, one that we would never live ut, for all the intuitive reasons, but I was nervous about first talking to her about it. We sort of 'eased' into it based on sharing or learning of various things and her observing my reaction.

Based on the number of recent posts of the subject I was curious about, or if at all, how others broached this subject with their spouses. However, based on the limited direct responses I received I think the one poster may have been correct when they mused that a number of these recent posts on the subject might be emanating from a small number of sources. I think the fantasy might be more prevalent than people think, but not on TAM. People who are on this site generally shouldn't be drawn to this sort of thing. The opposite really.

BTW, my wife's response to this fantasy has been that she is fine with it. I expressed to her how it made me feel uncomfortable/ashamed, knowing that this aroused me but she just responded that, "If it doesnt hurt anyone and it feels good than whats the problem?" She may just be saying this to be kind but her actions have been consistent with this, so far.
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post #41 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-28-2017, 11:40 AM
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

Nice going. Now you've planted this thought seed into your wife's mind. Don't be surprised that consciously or subconsciously, she entertains the thought and decides that, hey, if my husband is turned on by this, and there's a guy that I'm attracted to, I think I'll go for it.
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post #42 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-28-2017, 11:43 AM
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

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I cannot agree. This is a new and incipient behavior. Prior to this men cloistered their women to keep them from being taken by other men. In some societies this is still the case.
It's not new. The term cuckold came into existence around 1250 AD, and the term wittol around 1520 for men who were knowing and willing (wittingly) cuckolds. Yes, it's become much more common and known since porn became so ubiquitous.

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post #43 of 43 (permalink) Old 03-28-2017, 03:18 PM
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Re: Fantasy of Wife Watching: Does your spouse know?

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Originally Posted by soccermom2three View Post
Is it really a genuine fantasy? For a few maybe but my opinion is the rise of this new fetish it's just an escalation from a porn addiction. A few years ago an old TAM member made the case for this and I wish I could remember his name or saved his post. Basically a porn addict needs more and more dopamine as the porn gets more boring and mundane to the point where the wants to watch sex in person instead of on a computer screen. I don't think he necessarily wants to see his wife have sex with another man, he just wants to see live sex. His addiction has taken over common sense.
The theory is correct, but I think pretty much every fantasy/fetish/whatever has been around since the dawn of time. Possibly even more so back when sex was far less talked about and more taboo than it is now.

I can tell you, as an extremely casual porn watching male (like once or twice a month), and one who's been around since before the internet, I have fantasies, and they have nothing to do with 'wanting more' than porn.

I have NO desire to see my wife with anybody else, however the thought of watching live sex has always been there. As has being watched by a third party. But for me, it's never been in an amoral way (ie. getting "caught" - quotation marks intended, or sneaking around in the bushes being a perv). I have zero interest in subjecting an unwilling person to something they don't want to see, and I also respect people's privacy, duh. But it's just fantasy, in the end. I don't (think) I have a wife who'd be interested in either of those, so it's a moot point. It's also not even close to being an obsession of mine, just simply something that's in the back of my mind, and almost always has. It'll never get acted upon by me. If my wife were to bring it up, however, I'd be all over it...

The closest I ever came was when I was living in a college residence (not a dorm, so it was co-ed), just rental units for students. Was an old motel, cinder block walls, so you could hear pretty much anything next door. One neighbour was a single woman. Enough said. I wasn't single at the time, so it was initially awkward, being able to hear... everything, but the reality was the only way I could avoid it would be to leave the apt. or crank my music. Not something I particularly wanted to do at 11pm on a school night. So I "suffered" through it She was... prolific, and mostly on her own. For a 19 year old horny male, that made for a perfect next-door neighbour!

"Every time I read your posts about your wife I want to swallow strychnine."
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