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Navigation »Talk About Marriage »Focused Topics »Sex in Marriage » Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?

Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 01-15-2012, 11:18 AM   #226 (permalink)
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Default Re: Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?

"Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?"

I think you should let your wife read your threads and then let her make the decision for the both of you.
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Old 01-15-2012, 12:48 PM   #227 (permalink)
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Default Re: Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?

It would be real nice if the wife already suspects something and she's been snooping on his computer and found his history on her own, no doubt this guys been to Craigslist by now ... Maybe she's over in coping with infidelity as we speak...
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Old 01-15-2012, 01:14 PM   #228 (permalink)
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Default Re: Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?

OP,

if your willing to consider divorce over not recieving oral, I highly suggest you follow through. I cannot say I agree with your reasoning, but you do need to be a man and stand your ground. If your not happy, get out, or you only have yourself to blame.
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Old 01-16-2012, 01:28 PM   #229 (permalink)
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Default Re: Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?

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Originally Posted by thegreatwm View Post
I feel that bjs are a act of gratitude and it tells me how much she loves me as a husband and a provider. If I come home from a long day and she gives me one, it tells me that she appreciates me and this is my reward for taking care of my family. I have explained to her my view on this btw. Maybe my view is twisted but when she denies me, it makes me feel like I am not appreciate or loved at that moment.
This statement is inconsistent with your position that you are willing to stay married to her, yet get BJs on the side.

If BJs are a simple, physical act that you crave, then you could argue that you can satisfy your craving with some bar skank. You would still be morally unjustified, but at least you would be consistent.

Since you're arguing that BJs are your preferred way of feeling appreciated and loved, you can't argue that some random bar skank's mouth can fill that need. It's one or the other.

Based on other posters relating information from your other threads, you're kidding yourself. If you're not man enough to pass your wife's fitness tests, you're sure not man enough to convince some single woman to allow you to use her for sex. That takes pure, unadulterated, alpha bad-boy vibes. If your wife can bully you into waiting for her at the salon, your alpha chops are nowhere near the level needed to get a BJ in the parking lot of a singles' bar.

So I will go back to my original advice. Work on improving yourself. Work on becoming more attractive to women in general, and your wife specifically. Then, after the birth of your child, you can approach your wife from a more powerful position to discuss your relationship. If, at that time, she refuses to join you in working on your marriage, then you can suggest an open marriage or just divorce and move along.

Good luck.
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Old 01-16-2012, 01:31 PM   #230 (permalink)
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Default Re: Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?

Wow.

You expect her to give you a BJ to say thank you for going to work? Sorry, but wow. My husband gets frequent BJs but not right when he gets home. that's what it sounds like you are wanting.

Sad that you put so much stock into BJs meaning love. Hope you find it somewhere...but tell your wife first. Then tell your friends that you're going to leave/cheat beacuse you need BJs.

I'd laugh if I was your friend.
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Old 01-16-2012, 01:52 PM   #231 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thegreatwm View Post
I feel that bjs are a act of gratitude and it tells me how much she loves me as a husband and a provider. If I come home from a long day and she gives me one, it tells me that she appreciates me and this is my reward for taking care of my family. I have explained to her my view on this btw. Maybe my view is twisted but when she denies me, it makes me feel like I am not appreciate or loved at that moment.
You should take care of your family because you made a commitment to do so when you got married and had kids, and because it's the right thing to do. Not because you'll get a "reward" for it.

Though since that's how you see it, how do you "reward" your wife for all she does to take care of the family. Hopefully with something that's at least as important to her as BJs are to you.
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Old 01-16-2012, 02:39 PM   #232 (permalink)
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Default Re: Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?

He's going to cheat, no matter... Hey baby, I'm running to store to get some diapers, back in a few... What bull****. In his search for the almighty BJ, he's going to take away from precious time with his babies. What a waste.
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Old 01-16-2012, 03:39 PM   #233 (permalink)
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Default Re: Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?

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"Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?"

I think you should let your wife read your threads and then let her make the decision for the both of you.
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Old 01-16-2012, 04:08 PM   #234 (permalink)
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Default Re: Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?

Should she leave you if you fail to satisfy her orally? I think you already are.
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Old 01-17-2012, 09:04 PM   #235 (permalink)
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Default Re: Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?

After reading this thread as well as other threads on the infidelity forum, I don't think I will be cheating on my wife. I'm sure she will be much more hurt than I am with my lack of bjs if I got caught in an affair. I have put these issues on the back burner for now so we can focus on our unborn child. I will revisit them when her hormones are back to normal and hopefully, my view of things would have changed by then so I can find an alternate release if bjs are really something that she will forever forbid in our house. It still disgusts me when thinking about it but I guess it's just a part of life and the ways that people change. Thanks for all the advice and take care guys!
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Old 01-26-2012, 08:01 PM   #236 (permalink)
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Default Re: Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?

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Originally Posted by thegreatwm View Post
This is how I feel about my wife. She is currently pregnant and I'm recovering from a masturbation addiction.

Now, I understand that she is not always in the mood for sex (especially since she is pregnant) but she told me a couple months ago and she thinks BJs are disgusting and she doesn't want to give them to me anymore.

This makes me upset because she used to give me Bjs before we were married and also during the first part of our marriage. I feel like I was scammed......

Now the issue is....What should I do? I really love her and we already have 1 son together. She is due to have the second baby in May. I have always did what she wanted to do sexually

I am also open to any tricks that anyone has that may change her mind...... Please Help!
my first thought, maybe during your masturbation addiction, did she catch you watching oral sex videos during, looking at bj pictures, saying "suck my _ _ _ k" while playing with yourself?
Maybe it struck a nerve and the thought of oral, just reminds her of you pleasuring yourself, maybe while ignoring her?

secondly, not sure if you still enjoying every other kind of sex, just restricted in that one area (I'ld say enjoy what you have, and maybe bring it up every now and then and maybe it will turn around at some point..) pushing too much will just tick her off more....

And as far as doing whatever she wants sexually, maybe the next time she asks for something, offer a barter... oral for ????

As far as tricks.... might work for one... but probably wouldn't help in the long run... now one I might point out is when giving her oral or even any other form or sex.... bring her to the brink of cumming, and stop... repeat a few times... then... offer, if you get bj, she can have orgasm... (make sure all the batteries in her toys are dead, so at best she'ld have to steal them from remote to finish herself off) don't finish yourself off without her though, tell her you'll wait until she gets off. You might only get lucky when you've got her really horny (or drunk or both)

swollen, painful breasts from lactating, and a baby not nursing (and pump magically not working, at least temporatilly, but you'll fix it latter "just for her") might have the same effect... offer to relieve the pressure in exchange for relieving yours either before or after...

Also.. even though not willing to do oral... would she go for hand job.... with lube, can be just as enjoyable (almost)
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Old 01-27-2012, 03:16 AM   #237 (permalink)
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Default Re: Should I leave my wife if she fails to satisfy me orally?

your wife is selfish, if she was totally wanting to love you she would do anything out of love not out of being made or told to, she thinks she is the focus of the marriage and is running the household the way she wants to, this has its proof in the bedroom , a surrendered wife is what you need, one who will realise the marriage covenant is not about what is in it for her but what she can do for you, this is vice veras too, then both are truly free and the bedroom will be the best place ever
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