Originally Posted by lovinmyhubby223
And isn’t that a shame because it’s around that same time (late 40’s and 50’s) that men start having issues that cause their drive to decrease. I do understand what’s happening from a woman’s point of view though. Its natures last ditch effort to insure that we procreate. Since most women start menopause in their late 40’s to 50’s.
I have been more vocal on how this has affected ME personally than likely any woman who graced this forum, I know completely what they mean about that COUGAR
stage... I've never watched that Cougartown show, but I know I would be completely amused by it .
When this came upon me.... all I could think is damn... what a cruel Joke this is.... my husband is slowing down and I was just getting started !!! I was very disturbed by this, I did NOT LIKE his sex drive being lower than mine!
I am sure glad he didn't take some of the stuff that came out of my mouth personal during that time..... I was just trying to express HOW this was affecting me, my brain, my desires.... I suddenly wanted to go back in time something terrible....I was so angry I didn't take advantage of all those wonderul erections when they were so plentiful & easy to be had. I took them all for granted for so many years. I want to scream to all the young women....don't do that !!
I even told him I could take on 3 men during that time !! He couldn't keep up with me, but he sure tried ! Love him for that, he made the transition for me really enjoyable ....I count it as some of the happiest times we have ever experienced together, even if I was a bit frustrated at times.
I read a # of books on Hormones
, they play a huge role in these things , they almost have us by the balls... this was my absolute favorite one... Amazon.com: The Alchemy of Love and Lust (9780671004446): Theresa L. Crenshaw: Books
IT explained in detail why women in thier late 30's- early 40's are best sexually matched with younger men -early 20's -- both are in their prime
sexually .... Just as younger women (who aren't ragingly lustful generally) are better sexually matched with older men in their 40's -50's -cause they are slowing down...
...... But we can not allow our hormones to define us ...when married ...we need to diligently work through this.... Obviously those other scenerios are a train wreck - with younger women who marry a man 20 yrs older...then when her sex drive goes through the roof in her 40's - he'll be 60, and she will be going out of her living mind wanting someone who can keep up with the passion & lust that she is feeling.
It doesn't seem to happen to all women though, as many men seem to say on this forum, I think Drugs interfere with much of this.
I found this explained on the net one time about this phenomenon >>>
| Balance the seesaw. When they were first married, the man remembered, he always took the sexual lead, pulling his wife close and whispering his desire to make love. But now, 20 years later, she often makes the first move. |
Again, hormonal changes are bringing the couple into closer balance. Men and women both produce testosterone and estrogen, but the proportion of each changes over the years. The male's shifting levels of estrogen and testosterone may make him more willing to follow than to lead, happy for his wife to set the pace. And as a woman's estrogen declines and her testosterone becomes proportionately greater, she may become more assertive.