Ladies - How did you get past the inhibitions
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Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 01-30-2012, 12:23 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Ladies - How did you get past the inhibitions

My wife is relatively open about sex however, she still gets shy (at times) with things that get her to admit to her own sexuality and exploring new things. She (like many women) are afflicted with the Nice Girls don't....attitude. Whether it be exploring erotic material, anal, new toys she gets inhibited. Now all of these things she has expressed an interest in at some point but, then later she gets bashful. Even things we have done before. Oddly she considers herself to be rather liberal but, I think years of Catholic school has taken its toll. My wife is still is effected by this stuff and believe many other women are as well. I recently talked about engaging in some "anal play" with toys as i have heard of the pleasure of prostrate massage. She can't get past the ick factor. These inhibitions also surface in other areas. Is there hope.

Let's try to make this into a discussion about anal/toys per se but one to help eachother by offering help in this threads tittle.

Does anyone have success stories or suggestions?

Last edited by tjohnson; 06-02-2012 at 06:03 AM. Reason: clarify and asking again
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Old 01-30-2012, 02:23 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Ladies - How did you get past the inhibitions

Fool proof remedy, new, uninhibited, wife. That's the usual suggestion here, the D word. I'm being facetious.
If that's how she's always been, that's going to be tough. Shyness towards sex is a tough one to break, especially for us Catholic school kids. At least talking about it is. You feel like you're gona get struck down or your Mom is gonna jump from behind a wall and chastize you. lol.
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Old 01-30-2012, 02:33 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Ladies - How did you get past the inhibitions

I was raised by religious parents and sex was a VERY dirty word, so I had lots of inhibitions. My first husband did nothing to help me past them - sex was pretty much for his enjoyment, and since I didn't know any better, I thought that was just the way it was. But my current husband has a very different attitude and by being patient with me he was able to turn me around. He introduced me to porn, toys, games, and fun in the bedroom, as well as orgasms, and now I can't get enough
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Old 01-30-2012, 02:42 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Ladies - How did you get past the inhibitions

My husband helped me to mature sexually by being playful, persistent, and by letting me know that sex was how he connected to me emotionally. I did not understand that part when I was young. I thought sex was just a physical release for men--otherwise how could they go to a prostitute?

Another thing that helped was learning about how my body worked through masturbation. I realized that I couldn't let my husband know what pleased me if I didn't know how I had an orgasm.

I found that a great sex life helped us to overcome petty resentments and overlook each other's faults.
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Old 01-30-2012, 03:05 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Ladies - How did you get past the inhibitions

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Originally Posted by tjohnson View Post
My wife is relatively open about sex however, she still gets shy (at times) with things that get her to admit to her own sexuality and exploring new things. She (like many women) are afflicted with the Nice Girls don't....attitude. Whether it be exploring erotic material, anal, new toys she gets inhibited. Now all of these things she has expressed an interest in at some point but, then later she gets bashful. Even things we have done before. Oddly she considers herself to be rather liberal but, I think years of Catholic school has taken its toll.

Does anyone have success stories or suggestions?
Alcohol? I'm only partly kidding mind you... It certainly can help lower her inhibitions, but that would be a short term solution. It could possibly open the doors for you long term though Just a thought.
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Old 01-30-2012, 03:27 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Ladies - How did you get past the inhibitions

Actually, having a glass or two of wine is a great suggestion. My inhibitions were/are definitely lowered after that, and yes it may be short term, but often all you need is to break the barrier once and then it's down for good.
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