Re: How to cope with a sexless marriage?
First thing is to realize it is not sex you are missing - otherwise porn/masturbation would satisfy you. It is intimacy and love. Read up on that and understand what you are missing. That is the easy part to understand exactly how you are feeling because, as you've noticed, it is not uncommon. Sex starved marriage worked for me.
Hard part is getting your W to read/understand. To do that, you have to divorce the emotional rejection from the sexual rejection and first explain your emotional/intimacy needs are not met. Talking about this is tough because the no-sex partners become defensive and dismissive and instantly associates what you are missing with a juvenile interpretation of sex (men are horn dogs, sex is unimportant, sex is just getting off). Writing short letters or emails with links to sites helps (the first chapter of sex starved marriage is free on amazon and the author's website). Maybe out of cusiosity she'll read the links, maybe buy the book and leave it around. If she won't see, she won't see. That will help you realize it is not sex she doesn't want, she simply does not really care about you. Or, cares more about her pride of not being wrong, than she does about your marriage.
But, that is a better place to be in than having hope that is continuously disappointed. You can focus your hope on other things, or other people. Also, once you realize that your spouse does not care, it makes it easier to not care back and to not be disappointed.
I should say, my wife can be very difficult to talk to, will not take constructive criticism about anything, thought sex was just sex and not important . . .
But, I eventually got her to see and understand, and things are getting better. It was too many years of pity sex before I realized how she was wearing me down emotionally (she was not doing it intentionally, really had no clue how deep her comments cut - e.g., I always got a hurry up and lets get this over with type comments beforehand - even if she eventually got into it). It took 6 months from when I first told her it was an intimacy not sex issue for her to start to listen - and only then when I showed her the book that explained her behavior exactly. Even then, there were subsequent fights, because she could not handle being wrong, so she would invent new reasons why she had not interest. But, now, about 1.5 months from her wakeup date, we are much better and in a place where we can almost have an adult conversation, almost.