Hi faithnhope ~
Well, from your responses you sound like you have things very together.
So, from that perspective - why can't you and your H compromise on this a bit? For instance, instead of having a hard and fast 3-day rule, split the week up. You have 3 days in which to initiate something, he has three days to initiate something and it can be anytime in those 3 days. See how it goes.
What I have noticed, and this has been borne out in research, is that when women (generalizing) don't have sex regularly, they tend to desire it less and have a harder time getting back in to it and a harder time having an orgasm when they do. And, of course, men are the opposite - when they don't have sex regularly, they tend to desire it more and are very quick to get off when they have it. That makes for a very frustrating dynamic for partners who are not being regularly intimate.
Perhaps you can just start thinking in your mind about making it a higher priority. And maybe it doesn't always need to be sex, but just some kind of intimate contact every day - holding hands, rubbing his hair/shoulders/back, flirting with him, smiling, joking, laughing together. It is all of those seemingly small daily things that we do together everyday - the small threads in our daily lives - that weave us together and can make a fantastic tapestry. Don't ignore the power and beauty of all of those small daily gestures.
In the end, I truly do believe that intimacy is a state of our minds. We are open to it - or we are not. You can open the door to it and let your husband in.
Best wishes.
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