Sex in MarriageSexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.
I've been married to my husband for almost 8 years now and our relationship is great but, there are a few issues that have been bothering me for quite some time and I need advice.
My husband came into our marriage as a virgin and the beginning was a bit rocky because I had to "teach" him everything. The first few years I was more of the dominant one in the bedroom and he would follow- soon enough he felt confident and started to initiate the sex and took more control.
Now, he's taking everything to the extreme and it's getting pretty painful and exhausting. He wants sex in the morning (before work), in the shower, after work and maybe a few times before bed and it's come to the point where I can't properly get errands/work done because I'm too "tired".
What makes it even worse is that he has a very large penis and it hurts (even more when I'm not in the mood).
Also, I'm a bit concerned because we've been with each other for 8 years and I feel like I'm losing attraction and interest in him (I still love him dearly though; just don't want sex every breathing moment we have) but, he seems to be gaining more attraction and interest in me. I just find it a bit odd that he constantly wants sex even after being with me for so long- shouldn't the sex, attraction and interest be minimal by now?
I just feel like I'm his "sex object" and I don't like it. And no, I'm not just complaining out of the blue- it's been this way for 2-3 years now and I'm so tired and stressed over it.
Multiple times each day may be a bit compulsive and you are to be applauded for accommodating such a partner. Perhaps there should be the consideration of quality and not just quantity or at least the opportunity for one partner to make such a case. These episodes must be quickies at best and your physical distress is evidence enough. You might find him to be much more attractive to you if your are communicating what you need from your lover and my guess is that will not be slam bam. Put something in it for him as well and try to lure him into deeper and richer experiences and sometimes the anticipation itself is part of that process.
What happens when you talk to him about it? Posted via Mobile Device
We have talked about it before but, once he's in the mood he totally blacks out. Like, I'll tell him to calm down and he'll go easy for a few seconds but then he goes back to what he's use to.
I've also had to see our family doctor a few times because I had pain and bleeding due to the excessive sex.
Who are these people with sex addictions (multiple times per day) and don't realize there is an issue?
Then others applauding how accommodating you are, even in pain and bleeding. Really you don't understand you are being used? And women encouraging spouses to have sex each and everytime your spouse demands it..... Are you from the 60's?
The more I read TAM, the more incredulous I am....
Yeah, that's a bit much.. hope you guys can get some help with this. I consider myself fairly HD and can count the number of times on one hand that we've done it more than once in the same day. Something is wrong with him; this is not normal behavior!
We have talked about it before but, once he's in the mood he totally blacks out. Like, I'll tell him to calm down and he'll go easy for a few seconds but then he goes back to what he's use to.
I've also had to see our family doctor a few times because I had pain and bleeding due to the excessive sex.
I just don't think he gets it.
When he "blacks out", knee him in the nuts, and see if he gets it then. And what about talking to him about the multiple times a day? Posted via Mobile Device
When he "blacks out", knee him in the nuts, and see if he gets it then. And what about talking to him about the multiple times a day? Posted via Mobile Device
His excuse is that he's just "too attracted" to me. Somehow, I think he has jealousy issues too but, I don't know if it has to do with the sex.
Who are these people with sex addictions (multiple times per day) and don't realize there is an issue?
Then others applauding how accommodating you are, even in pain and bleeding. Really you don't understand you are being used? And women encouraging spouses to have sex each and everytime your spouse demands it..... Are you from the 60's?
The more I read TAM, the more incredulous I am....
To each their own and I'm asking for advice; not judgement.
To each their own and I'm asking for advice; not judgement.
I did advise..... Your Husband has an addiction and issues. He blacks out. He needs to see a professional and you need to stop giving into his addiction. It can't be enjoyable can it?????
So lucky- I wouldn't complain if it were only one time at night. Well, the only plus side of this is that we've both lost a few pounds.
I wonder if having kids would slow him down?
I would STRONGLY recommend not having kids with him till you get this straightened out. Most likely result is you're more tired, and he's still a jackass.
Seriously, if my GF was aggressive to the point of bleeding and pain, we wouldn't be having sex anymore, or a relationship. And if she tried after I said no, she'd be thrown off the bed. I wasn't kidding about kneeing him in the nuts, BTW.
2Likes
Too much sex? And his penis hurts. 
Re: Too much sex? And his penis hurts. 
