diwali123

My h has been down, tired, had headaches every day, is stressed out. Our sex life has gone from 3x a week to maybe 1x a week.
He doesn't like to know that I'm masturbating and we've had fights about it. If it looks like its not going to happen tonight I'm going to tell him that I'm going to take an hour of private time alone in our room. I'm sure it will raise eyebrows but I don't care. I don't even think I'll tell him what Im doing.
Do you think I'm in the right?
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diwali123

I should mention he is starting counseling and he's gone to the dr about his headaches.
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2nd_t!me iz_best

yes, i think that should be fine.
maybe if he doesnt like you to masturbate and he knows that is what you are doing tell him he can take care of it or you are and thats just the way its going to be, his choice.

i had pretty constant headaches for a while til my exgf talked me into going to the dr and i found i had very high blood pressure.
got on meds for that and hardly any headaches any more.

good luck to you.

chillymorn

be real loud and make the bed squeek when you come out of the room make sure your sweating and out of breath. then look him in the eye and say WOW my fantasy of you is better than the real you.

diwali123

I don't want to make him feel bad. It's not his fault that he doesn't feel good, he's trying. It's just been a week and I'm horny.
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Toshiba2020

Dang once a week!? i only get it once a month and its been that way for two years

diwali123

I couldn't live like that. If this turns into once a month we're getting separate bedrooms and I'm subscribing to a premium porn site for women.
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Jeff74

I think your first priority should be to help your husband out of his funk and see if there is an underlying medical problem to his headaches. I have a feeling when he is better your sex life will get better too.
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diwali123

I've done everything I can do. I made an appt for the best ENT in the city, they didn't find anything. I made him go to his family doctor and they gave him
meds. It was like pulling teeth getting him to go. He has an appointment next week with a good neurologist. I convinced him to make an appointment with a counselor last night, I try to help him as much as I can, listening and trying to help him.
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diwali123

Aw, he got me roses. Maybe tonight will be the night. I just feel bad now.
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bandit.45

If he is too tired for sex tonight, why not invite him to help you?

I used to really enjoy manually stimulating my wife and watching her get off. That is, before she cheated on me.

Or, is your husband a prude? I don't understand why he would get mad at you pleasuring yourself.

diwali123

I guess it's because he's only been with me and his ex. And his ex wasnt that into sex and he always wanted more than her. It's hard for him to deal with being with someone who wants it three times a week. I think he takes it personally and thinks he's letting me down. Well it's my
body, it's not his fault I'm a horny 40 year old. It's complicated. Anyway I've asked him to do that before and he's an all or nothing guy. He doesn't do that and he doesn't like me to do just a BJ, he wants sex.
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bandit.45

Yep. He's a prude.

I'm a very conservative guy politically and morally, but I never refused my wife anything she asked for sexually ... short of swinging of course!

I'm sorry, but he needs to be told that he needs to step up to the plate!

diwali123

Um yeah. How do you do that without it blowing up in your face? Sometimes he can he very kinky, very open but he has some hang ups obviously.
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diwali123

I do get the feeling that he's afraid that sex will become the only reason we're together. I don't know how to get him over that.
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