Sex in MarriageSexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.
My husband and I have a wonderful sex life....we've been married for 4 years and together for about 9. We are both in our twenties, and are the only people that each other has been with. Before we had kids, we did some "experimenting"....He is really into the whole lesbian thing, and honestly, I am too. I think it's really hot. I have been with other women in front of my husband, and he loved it...We both agreed that he could only watch, but not touch....I have always heard bad things about threesomes and the result it has on marriages, so I was nervous about it.....Well, we have two young sons now, so the whole "three-way" subject has went back into the closet. However, I find myself fantasizing about watching him be with another woman...as well as having a three-some. I am not really a jealous person, but I am not sure how I would like REALLY seeing my husband with another woman. I get off to the idea when I....ummm..."get off", but I am not sure if it were real if i would like it.....I really think that I would love to try it....but maybe we shouldn't because we're married and have kids....and also because I don't want to ruin our marriage....Do you guys have any advice? Has anyone had a threesome and it ruined their marriage....or was it a good one time experience?
I can see that....and that's what I am afraid of....I just don't know how to shake this fantasy....I think it comes from the fact that we are each others' first and only....and don't really have a sexual history with anyone else....while I think having a threesome would be soooo hot...I also am afraid of taking that "pureness" out of our marriage....I mean, I think it's pretty special...
You have been with another girl tho, right? So really, you did live out the fantasy in a way. Maybe just use porn to live it out but not actually act on it. Like you said, it might be something completely opposite of what you were expecting, in a bad way.
I was with another girl....actually like....3 of them....and while I liked it, I just have the need to see him with them as well....enjoying himself....listening to him...watching him...I don't know why....it's weird...I think that I get off on him getting off....if he is feeling pleasure, then I am too.....I could honestly get off while giving him a blowjob....I don't even know that he would ever have a threesome....he's just....so good....maybe that's my thing too....He just seems so good and pure like to me........ughhh weird fantasies....I think that I need help.....the sexual part of my brain is not wired right apparently....
lol...that would be a great idea, but i know the whole time i was watching it, i would be more worried of how i looked instead of being turned on....i think we're going to put this one in the closet...we had INCREDIBLE sex last night and i just don't know if it gets any better than that...even if we added 10 people lol...thanks for the advice
I don't think any marriage is enhanced by bringing anyone else into a circle of intimacy designed for just two folks. What happens if husband starts being more than just sexually interested in this third woman or you start to be more interested in her than in your husband? Right now, you have a pretty good thing. Your kids have both parents intact and neither you or your husband are suspicious of who the other might be doing. Adding another party could ruin all that. I have a fantasy about Jennifer Anniston but acting on it (yeah, as if) wouldn't enhance my marriage.
Look on a website find a local swingers club,then go BUT do not exchange partners,once again you do not have to exchange partners,there is a lot of fun you can have watching and being watched plus you can go at it right next to another couple but with no touching.I can personally tell you I have enjoyed the hell out of doing that through the years and have never exchanged partners.
All adultary begins in the mind. Whether it's found in a magazine, on the internet, at a club, or with a friend or coworker, why invite a burglar into your home? Wouldn't the unmistakable message be that your current partner isn't quite enough? No woman on earth comes equipped with gear my wife doesn't have and none know any special sexual judo she can't master. I don't spend a second worrying about who she's talking to, what's she's looking at, or what she's doing. She doesn't have to worry about those things with me. Peace of mind aint a bad thing.
Since you have already had 3 different women in bed with you, the concept of someone new in bed isn't unusual. You find women at least somewhat arousing. We know your husband does.
Tell him that you would like to be with another woman again and that you would like to be with him as well. Let him know you may change your mind when the time comes (be sure to reward him if he honors your wishes if you change your mind).
(be sure to reward him if he honors your wishes if you change your mind).
I had no problems with your post until this point. If he honors her wishes if she changes her mind? I hope you don't mean that the way it sounds... If she says she wants a threesome and then changes her mind, she doesn't "owe" her husband anything and she especially doesn't "owe" him anything on the premise that she should be thankful he didn't screw the other woman anyway. That is sick.
To the OP: Having a threesome, even if both partners are interested in it, can create problems in your marriage. If he develops an interest in the other woman, it could become a situation where he starts sleeping with her on his own, without you. That said, each marriage is different and at least you *are* both interested in it so if you do make the choice to go ahead, no one feels pressured to do so.
Wife has had intercourse with 3 other women. Man has not (and if I am not mistaken has only been with this woman). Wife wants to bring a woman into the bedroom for a threesome for her gratification (though I am certain he may enjoy it). Should she change her mind mid-way (what is the term, coitus interuptus) by all means she should reward him. It doesn't have to be sexual, but it needs to be done.
"I know I said I wanted to do this and I know I got you all worked up for it, but I appreciate you honoring my inhibitions. Why don't I take you to the hockey game tonight."