Just want some touch
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Navigation »Talk About Marriage »Focused Topics »Sex in Marriage » Just want some touch

Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

View Poll Results: When does your wife touch you below the belt?
Never 6 21.43%
1-2 times month 4 14.29%
3-6 times month 1 3.57%
6 x or more a month 11 39.29%
Only during sex 6 21.43%
Voters: 28. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 03-25-2012, 12:59 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Just want some touch

So I just want to check my own sanity here and ask the forums a poll question.
Since my wife really never touches me anywhere I want to see what everyone else may experience. Interested in mostly the intimate touching below the waist. Can't remember the last time she did.
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Old 03-25-2012, 01:36 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

Point of clarification:
Are you talking about fondling during sex or groping under the table when you're out to supper with friends?
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Old 03-25-2012, 01:41 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Rockstar View Post
Point of clarification:
Are you talking about fondling during sex or groping under the table when you're out to supper with friends?
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During sex.
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Old 03-25-2012, 01:47 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

To be honest....for the most part, it's mostly during foreplay/sex but I have surprised Hubs grabbed him! Lol!

I think it's fair game.....really no different than me being grabbed on the a$$ or chest when he walks by.
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Old 03-25-2012, 02:01 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

I touch H intimately *always* during sex.

I also touch him intimately outside of sex ... everyday... sometimes multiple times a day.

I learned that he actually likes to be groped... and he learned that I didn't enjoy groping as much as I liked the non-sexual touches outside of sex.

So, all is well.

Why do you think your wife is like this?
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Old 03-25-2012, 02:02 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

Quote:
Originally Posted by LadyFrogFlyAway View Post
If I'm understanding your question, while sporking I like to reach down and grab some arse, or cup *the boys*, or do a little hand action on his Willy Wonka when he's out.
LOL

but thats nice.
a guy needs a little of that too once in a while.
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Old 03-25-2012, 02:14 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

Quote:
Originally Posted by Enchantment View Post
I touch H intimately *always* during sex.

I also touch him intimately outside of sex ... everyday... sometimes multiple times a day.

I learned that he actually likes to be groped... and he learned that I didn't enjoy groping as much as I liked the non-sexual touches outside of sex.

So, all is well.

Why do you think your wife is like this?
She has always been like this and it if finally taking a huge mental/emotional toll on me.
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Old 03-25-2012, 02:17 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

Quote:
Originally Posted by LadyFrogFlyAway View Post
Have you told her that you like it and want her to do it?

What does she say?
She turns it around on me as if I am a pervert and a sex fiend.. she backs this up with so called conversations she has with her friends. Told her I don't care about her friends or their sex lives because this is ours, or not.
She honestly acts as if she does not like anything or just won't admit it. She's one of those "I never have masturbated type people".
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Old 03-25-2012, 02:31 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

Quote:
Originally Posted by LadyFrogFlyAway View Post
Do you guys have sex? And if so, does she enjoy it at all, even a little?

Not trying to pry, just trying to understand your situation.
Yes, she most does the obligation type sex, say 2x a week. When she does enjoy (orgasm) it's always on top. Sometimes I have to guess if she did or not because she doesn't make a peep during sex. It is just sex though, no foreplay, kissing, etc.
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Old 03-25-2012, 03:15 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

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Originally Posted by LadyFrogFlyAway View Post
No foreplay or kissing. Wow.

You say she has always been like this...any idea why?

Something in her past, like she was taught sex is for procreation only, ect.
I wish I knew or better yet wish she would tell me. I think she thinks it is alright in her mind. She avoids answering the question or questions by turning it around on me.
I have told her it is unnatural but again I am the perverted sex fiend so no matter what I say it is slanted.
All her friends are even more prudish than she is... according to her.
I am close to a breaking point here I think.
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Old 03-25-2012, 03:21 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

Get a copy of His Needs, Her Needs by Willard Harley. It explains how one of the top male needs in marriage is sex. Your wife needs to understand that she is denying you affection. Sex is the way men connect to their wives emotionally.
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Old 03-25-2012, 03:30 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

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Originally Posted by lovesherman View Post
Get a copy of His Needs, Her Needs by Willard Harley. It explains how one of the top male needs in marriage is sex. Your wife needs to understand that she is denying you affection. Sex is the way men connect to their wives emotionally.
Thanks for the advice... have read many books and all. She knows it is important but I am still the problem, perverted and all.
She doesn't care as far as I can tell.
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Old 03-25-2012, 03:32 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

In better times, my wife's hand was usually migrating southward at any given moment we were in physical contact

It truly became an unconscious habit and I had to stop her when it was semi public or any other circumstances I didn't want to risk an unwanted erection.
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Old 03-25-2012, 03:34 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

Have you tried cooling down the temperature in your relationship? If you tell her often that you love her, stop doing that. If you do more than your share around the house, get a hobby and spend time with friends. Don't be a jerk, but withdraw things that she likes to get her attention that something is very wrong in your marriage. You need to take action to get the message across to her.
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Old 03-25-2012, 03:43 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: Just want some touch

I'm sure this won't work, but if your wife is as uptight as you say, I'm going to suggest it anyway. There are some sexual instruction videos out there, you can find them either on the online adult toy stores or some of the more prominent sex therapists. They'll often include interviews with real couples who have agreed to be filmed (not pornstars). The few I've seen will focus on techniques and positions, but they'll go into detail about the intimacy of those techniques, and it sounds like intimacy is your wife's real issue. There are also sex seminars each weekend around the US, where the instructors will instruct sex techniques from a bonding viewpoint, and then release the couples to their hotel rooms to "practice." Afterwards, the couple reconvene and focus on how the techniques made the couples feel closer together.

Like I said, if your wife is as closed off as you say, I can't imagine her going for either of these suggestions, but I thought them worth mentioning.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that you are your wife's first partner?
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