Sex in MarriageSexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.
Sometimes when we have sex my husband doesn't climax and he seems okay with it, he just says I got mine and that makes him happy... is this normal or an underlying issue?
I know it's been more frequent since we've been having to use condoms, so I don't know if it's just that it doesn't feel as good, or it takes him longer to get off?
I can tell you that my husband likes sex (and gets hard) way more often than he can climax, so we frequently have sex that does not lead to an orgasm for him -- took me a while to understand it, but he loves it. He loves frequent sex, and if he doesn't mind not coming, then...uh, ok? (I do prefer it when he comes, though -- feels like I got an A+ )
Occasionally I have times when I don't get off. I could keep pounding away until I do eventually orgasm and make my wife sore as Hell or wait until tomorrow.
It's no fun when she is so sore that she can't pee, so I always try again tomorrow.
when I don't orgasm most times it because I'm pi$$ed off and resentfull at her.
another reason is that I took care of things earlier that day. I'm 45 not 25 so that coupled with resentment can make it difficult to complete the task.
I have never had the issue yet but since we have sex 2-3 times a month releasing too often isn't an issue.
That being said, condoms do make a HUGE difference for me personally. Without one, I don't last as long as I would like. With one I can last much longer so it definitely desensitizes it.
Sometimes when we have sex my husband doesn't climax and he seems okay with it, he just says I got mine and that makes him happy... is this normal or an underlying issue?
I know it's been more frequent since we've been having to use condoms, so I don't know if it's just that it doesn't feel as good, or it takes him longer to get off?
I'd love to hear some guys input on this!
The older I get the easier it gets to stop without getting off.
Not really a big deal but not something I do often.
However, your problem is undoubtedly the condoms.
I haven`t used a condom since I was a teen and there was no way I was going to reach orgasm with one on then so I know it ain`t happening now.
Sometimes when we have sex my husband doesn't climax and he seems okay with it, he just says I got mine and that makes him happy... is this normal or an underlying issue?
I know it's been more frequent since we've been having to use condoms, so I don't know if it's just that it doesn't feel as good, or it takes him longer to get off?
I'd love to hear some guys input on this!
I don't think it's "normal", but I don't think it's as unusual as society makes it out to be.
I've walked away from sex w/o climax too many times to count.
It's not ideal, and frankly it bothers a part of me every time sex ends w/o me climaxing.
I've found in general though, that if I don't get off after a certain amount of time... I can last for hours (quite literally) and never climax (but remain completely erect and enjoying it).
It just gets ridiculous because my wife is no longer into it, and frankly I don't want to bore her... not to mention the fact that she's more than done and is loosing interest is a major turn off.
As for sensation causing part of the problem, yes it can for me. I've not used condoms since college, but I can assure you it definitely diminished sensitivity a TON. To the point where it became incredibly difficult for me to climax with a condom on (I think I've only managed to a handful of times... max). I know I'm irregular in this regard (else no one would use condoms), but I think it's just that orgasms don't come easily for me (compared to most guys I hear about)... never have.
I'll also say that after my wife climaxes 1-3 times her vagina seems to just relax and what friction I was getting before plummets to nothing. It's like having intercourse with a balloon filled with air... there's some feeling near the opening, but the rest is basically not there at all. While I enjoy just the act of sex enough to want to continue sometimes, other times I just pull out.
I can't imagine doing this. Perhaps if I felt that my wife wasn't that into me or if she seemed to be performing duty/chore sex then I would try to get her off and then just stop. But assuming my wife is into it and seems to really want it, then I would always make sure to get mine. BTW, I'm 41 so maybe if a guy is a bit older it makes a difference.
Weeeellll I wouldn't say condoms suck.... They do have the Fire and ice condoms.... and the his/her sensation ones... soooo if your gonna use a condom.. why not one that does a lil something? Just a suggestion... Also.. the ky his/her or ky intense is pretty interesting to use too....
This is something I'm working on. It just doesn't seem like we should be done unless we've both reached climax.
What my husband has explained to me it that he's reaching orgasm, but not ejaculating. Although I know there have been many times he hasn't even reached the o, and tells me he just wanted to make me feel great and satisfy me. I feel bad about it just about every time, but then he pulls me close and tells me he loves me.
I have to accept what he's telling me even though it doesn't seem to compute in my mind.
It happens frequently throughout the years of a man's life. Basically the normal thing. If he is okay, then be okay with it, too! When frustration on the man's part enters the picture, then there may be a need for further investigation, i.e. medicines, etc. Delayed orgasm or no orgasm is an issue most deal with at some point. It is the norm. As someone said, "This can lead to more frequent sex!" Enjoy! Smiles!!!