Sex in MarriageSexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.
It might be too late to start, but perhaps the pill would be a good choice. Condoms fail sometimes. Never hurt to double up on protection.
Still though, I know you two have talked for years but you don't have to sleep with him on your first face to face date. If he really loves you, he won't mind waiting for you.
If he does pitch a fit because you didn't have sex with him, then you have to wonder what his motives really are anyway.
Indeed. If someone doesn't wait for me then he is not worth having.
He said he'd wait and he'd never pressure me.
Words are just words so actions are what I believe in.
__________________ Shaggy: Men of integrity don't have affairs. They don't have affairs not because there aren't other wonderful women out there besides their wives, they don't have affairs because as men of integrity they choose not to.
Last edited by lovelygirl; 05-23-2012 at 03:08 PM.
Lovelygirl I have this feeling that your really going to enjoy it the
first time you have sex. Enjoy it so much that you may start thinking why you waited so long.
Some young girls I knew where like that in college. Some went a little wild and became easy.
Don't become easy. Just because your a pretty young lady doesn't mean a man wouldn't
lose respect for you if you just gave it up and were easy.
You're right.
I waited so long to find the right moment and I don't want to sound stupid by having sex during the week he comes here.
I've been talking to a lot of guy online, I have even joined dating sites in the past and this is not the first guy I've known online.
Problem is that I have never had such a sexual attraction for someone as I have for him. And I admit, I hate the way I feel about him. I hate the fantasies that I have about him pleasuring me. This is unusual and not how it's supposed to be for me.
I don't know ...but maybe I should stop talking to him?
__________________ Shaggy: Men of integrity don't have affairs. They don't have affairs not because there aren't other wonderful women out there besides their wives, they don't have affairs because as men of integrity they choose not to.
Last edited by lovelygirl; 05-23-2012 at 03:05 PM.
__________________ Shaggy: Men of integrity don't have affairs. They don't have affairs not because there aren't other wonderful women out there besides their wives, they don't have affairs because as men of integrity they choose not to.
Whoa, lovely, how did you get there? How did you go from liking him and having sexual feelings and agreeing to have a safe encounter to...maybe I should stop talking to him?
On a serious note you've waited this long, if the guy isn't what you're looking for don't be afraid to refuse him or ask for more time.
I can't say he's not someone I'm looking for. He has a lot of things I look for in a guy.
But the problem is that my thoughts about him are pretty sexual.
I don't want to be in a relationship with someone whom I want only for sex. That's not me. But this guy is tempting me in a lot of ways.
__________________ Shaggy: Men of integrity don't have affairs. They don't have affairs not because there aren't other wonderful women out there besides their wives, they don't have affairs because as men of integrity they choose not to.
Whoa, lovely, how did you get there? How did you go from liking him and having sexual feelings and agreeing to have a safe encounter to...maybe I should stop talking to him?
What's up? What are you not telling us?
Dean made me think that I might sound easy.
I hate to sound that way and that's why maybe I should stop talking to him for a while to make my sexual desire about him go away.
__________________ Shaggy: Men of integrity don't have affairs. They don't have affairs not because there aren't other wonderful women out there besides their wives, they don't have affairs because as men of integrity they choose not to.
__________________ Shaggy: Men of integrity don't have affairs. They don't have affairs not because there aren't other wonderful women out there besides their wives, they don't have affairs because as men of integrity they choose not to.
I can't say he's not someone I'm looking for. He has a lot of things I look for in a guy.
But the problem is that my thoughts about him are pretty sexual.
I don't want to be in a relationship with someone whom I want only for sex. That's not me. But this guy is tempting me in a lot of ways.
Manipulation?
IDK but if Im texting/skyping a girl, even after a couple of times, sex becomes the only thing on my mind. Its a guy thing probably.
Try ignoring sexual remarks and focus more on personal matters?
You don't sound easy, sweetie. You sound like a normal 24-year old girl excited about seeing her beau.
I think there may also be some cultural forces at work here -- I am not all that familiar with Albanian culture, but I can tell you that here, it's considered quite normal and natural for a young woman your age to have sexual urges, and to express them appropriately.
You don't sound easy, sweetie. You sound like a normal 24-year old girl excited about seeing her beau.
I think there may also be some cultural forces at work here -- I am not all that familiar with Albanian culture, but I can tell you that here, it's considered quite normal and natural for a young woman your age to have sexual urges, and to express them appropriately.
So, no guilt! OK? You're normal!
Thank you!! <3333
The fact is that out of all my friends, I'm the only virgin. You don't find a lot of virgin girls at my age over here. But what bothers me is the hypocrisy. Albanians don't usually talk about sex yet they all have sex. My girl-friends lost their virginity at an early age, yet they don't really have any sex talk ..and on the other hand they call me a pervert for wanting to talk about sex.
This doesn't make sense. If I told them the fantasies I have about this guy they would give me a weird look even though I'm sure they have the same fantasies about their boyfriends...it's just that they don't talk about it. So I'm no different. That's what they don't understand.
__________________ Shaggy: Men of integrity don't have affairs. They don't have affairs not because there aren't other wonderful women out there besides their wives, they don't have affairs because as men of integrity they choose not to.
LG, I think it is possible to develop a real relationship without face to face, however there will always be that sliver of incompleteness... After 5 years of intimate conversation with him you probably know each other more intimately than anyone else, I think it would be fair to say you have feelings of love for each other. If he has invested that much time into your relationship I suspect his goal isn't just one time sex. While it is easy to hide your true self from others behind a computer, after long periods you would have noticed things to question the trust you have been building with him.
A coworker has been having on online relationship with a young Catholic woman from China for the past couple years - he visited her last year - they are both religious and would not have premarital sex, however they get engaged and this past weekend he travelled there with his parents to have the marriage ceremony.
Us coworkers of his all question her motives, but the reason I'm writing this is to point out that his motives are true, and he is pretty much in love with this girl.
If you are both being true, I think you will have an amazing time with your cyber bf! The hard part will be parting ways I suspect. Just don't rush into anything you don't want and play safe.
Most educated ladies I know are open to sex and fantasies, etc.
If I remember correctly you are educated correct?
So you would be normal over here in the USA.
Yes. I graduated from Law School two years ago. Now I'm doing my Master's Degree on European Business Law. I know 3 other foreign languages [besides my native one (Albanian)].
Talking about sex is still a taboo over here and even some of the most educated people I know here still find it a shame to talk about sex. It's just the mentality. Although I can tell you that many Albanian girls are known for their ****ty attitude towards guys and have sex for the money, which to me is something totally disgusting!
Quote:
What is really missing Ms Lovelygirl is the man courting you and you
having a first date in person without the pressure of sex.
Correct. I just wish the sex talk with this guy was non-existent because it has ruined my balance.
There's nothing wrong about sex, it's just that I want to have it in a stable, secure relationship.
Quote:
Almost all relationships where you have sex on the first date don't last.
There is always exceptions but many men lose respect for a woman who
has sex on the first date.
I agree. That's what I've always thought although I'd never judge someone who has had sex on the first date because ..who knows what I'd do if I were in her place.
__________________ Shaggy: Men of integrity don't have affairs. They don't have affairs not because there aren't other wonderful women out there besides their wives, they don't have affairs because as men of integrity they choose not to.
28Likes
Re: sex talk 
