Sex in MarriageSexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.
The longest I've gone that I can remember is about a week. Since being with my GF, I'd rather use our "down time" to build sexual tension, rather than just achieve a release on my own. So when one of us goes away for holidays or vacation, we both just let the tension build.
And then she walks funny for a few days after we get back together...
In my opinion, something is "wrong" with your husband if he's gone months. Either in your relationship or mentally/emotionally or physically. But that's just my personal opinion.
C Posted via Mobile Device
Tonight I hinted at that I needed love...and he said he gives me love all the time...I said I need husband and wife love....he said he couldn't because he has too much stress, says he has never had this much stress in his life. He said I needed to wait until we get settled....
I'm guessing "settled" means when we can rent a house together in the state he's going to be working in. In the mean time I'll be living with his parents while he's away.
The car race is on tonight and he said hopefully we will be able to see the next race in November, because we will be down there. So I guess I have to wait until November?
I don't think my husband has any type of desire while he's so stressed. So this time is because he's very stressed and before our seperation was because he was resentful of me.
For some reason before the period of time he was resentful, he had sexual performance anxiety. Posted via Mobile Device
Re: Can men go for periods of months without sex or masterbation?
Everybody handles stress differently. But I was working 90 hour weeks, and had just separated from my STBXW when I met my current GF. That it was too soon is the topic for another post. But we still quickly got into a once a day sex life pattern, and we're in our early 40's.
Didn't he hook up with someone elsewhen you two were separated? Where was his stress then?
[QUOTE=PBear;778885]Everybody handles stress differently. But I was working 90 hour weeks, and had just separated from my STBXW when I met my current GF. That it was too soon is the topic for another post. But we still quickly got into a once a day sex life pattern, and we're in our early 40's.
Didn't he hook up with someone elsewhen you two were separated? Where was his stress then?
C Posted via Mobile Device[/QUOTE
Yes he did hook up with someone during our seperation that was clearly a sexual elation ship from the very start. He met her on lots of fish and had sex with her 1 week after meeting her. I'm not sure how often they had sex. She of course told me they had sex several times per week. I know he was working 50-60 hrs per week during this time with a 1 1/2 hr drive 1 way. The OW has proved herself to be crazy, so I can't trust anything she said at all.
My Husband was very stressed at this time. He did keep emailing me angry emails while he was with her. He says his affair was to try to get over me.
I do fear that he is not as sexually attracted to me as he was to her. I've seen a picture of her from her FB profile and briefly saw other pictures of her while she was still on my Hs friend list. She was much curvier than me with oviusly larger bra size. She has the same color hair as me and not sure about her eye color.
My Husband has said that once I csn get a boob job that he will basically LOVE them!!!
I guess it's very hard for me to deal with my Husbands non desire of sex right now when I know he has it several times with her. The difference may be that he was trying as hard as he could (literally) to get over me.
Aside from no sex he's very touchy feelly all day every day with me. He often gets paranoid with me lately if I'm queit for to long.
Maybe with the huge amount of stress he feels snd that he does not feel confident in our marriage is why he has no desire at all. If he were confident in our marriage he would not be freaking out on me so often.
I'm just holding out hood that in the future we can be sexually happy. I miss the sex!!! Posted via Mobile Device
OP so what's your REAL question? What are you really worried about?
I'm worried that my Husband loves me, but is not sexually attracted to me. Little comments that he's made in the past even if it's just once bothers me, coupled with this non sex!! He dies not talk about my boobs now, finally!! But he did talk about how he wanted them to be bigger and that my nipple area was too large, right after he moved back in. I felt compared to OW breasts everyday. I also learned something else that he never said before our seperation. He says he can not fit his whole penis inside anymore for that deep feint because I had a hysterectomy taking out my cervix. He only mentioned it once. Now I can look back on our sex post hysterectomy and remember that he doesn't go balls in. If there is a surgery to correct this, I would do it for him. We have not talked about it again after he said he can't go balls in Posted via Mobile Device
Yes my husband can totally be an ass!! He's stopped saying what he used to say, but damage is done. Posted via Mobile Device
Except he's continuing to be an ass...
If one of his good buddy's needed help for an hour, I'd bet he could find the energy to go over to his buddy's place and help out, right? But he can't work up enough energy to help you out with your needs? What kind of bull pucky is that? What does that say about how important your happiness is to him?
Re: Can men go for periods of months without sex or masterbation?
I don't know if the comments are meant to belittle me or not. He always says I take things too seriously. He's a little odd and I'm thinking he is aspergers. We have a son with autism and a daughter with aspergers.
He just says he is uninterested in sex at all right now cause of the stress.
When he goes out of state to set up to work, he wants me to go with him and then I fly back on a one way ticket. So I guess that's good that he wants me to go with him. Posted via Mobile Device
Re: Can men go for periods of months without sex or masterbation?
Yes... but its relatively unhealthy to do so.
Men NEED to ejaculate at least once every week or so to decrease risk of all sorts of health issues.... especially prostate, stress, heart etc.
More important when involved on a relationship just due to the psychological wear and tear on the male mind.
I've had to go up to 6 months without sex... during the time frame of our sexless marriage time frame (2.5 years out of 18). I've never given up masturbating strictly for the health benefits....and keeping myself mentally sane.
Thankfully this period of my life is "almost" over. Wife and I finally see 100% eye to eye and are working towards a healthy marriage together. Stay tuned for how we got there in the next few months...after real world results are evident and lasting.
Re: Can men go for periods of months without sex or masterbation?
I worry about his health too, but I doubt he cares about the health risks involved in him not releasing at least once a week. He hasn't released in over a month cause our last time, he did not cum. He said he got distracted because his head was hitting the head board. The sex wasn't as fulfilling to me because he didn't cum. I like part of him inside me.
It just seems if his life isnts near perfect he has no desire for sex or masterbation. I know he's not self pleasuring because we are together all the time.
I think part of his non sex is this house. He said in the past before he moved back in that he could never live in this house again cause there were too many bad memories.
We are moving tomorrow, but not into a house that will be ours or renting. We are moving in with his parents and then my husband is getting ready to leave out of state to work Posted via Mobile Device
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Re: Can men go for periods of months without sex or masterbation? 
