It seems the LD males are lurkers or just unable to use the internet for whatever reason. Maybe they have a low internet drive as well. If you are a husband who no longer wants sex from his wife, or thinks your wife just wants too much sex, please come help us out. We have a lot of threads here where your opinion (no trolls - real husbands are needed) would really help. I'd like to understand was it years of rejection, is it the fact you are just not attracted to your wife, no longer interested in sex because she is boring in bed, maybe interested in another sex, porn addiction and prefer to masturbate or the drive for sex is just gone. I suppose I am more interested in a young to middle age guy that just has no sex drive. That seems to be the problem on the forums from some of these wives. No real reason, just no sex drive. If you could give us your age, that would definitely help some of us relate.
We seem to have HD wives, LD wives, and HD husbands on the forum, but the elusive LD husband is hard to find. Maybe because it's like being gay? Something they'd prefer to just NOT talk about?
Some of the threads here just completely blow my mind. I am not sure if the wives are exaggerating, leaving out a big piece of the puzzle, or just creating a problem from something they've created. I'd absolutely love to get some responses from the LD males.
I'm not sure my experience counts, but I think it's somewhat applicable and may explain how LD husbands operate.
Firstly, I'm not a LD man. I'm a HD and have been in all my relationships. However, in my first marriage, even though I was the one asking for it, I didn't really 'want' it. Rather it was more a case of having a need and only one source to meet that need. Just because I went to her for sex, doesn't mean it was a big thrill for me.
The reason I say my experience might be applicable is because if I had to go through what I went through in my marriage as a LD husband, I can guarantee the sex would have likely dried up completely.
I'm not going to get into long-winded details here, for sake of people skipping over it as a tl;dr post. But my ex-wife really turned me off sex as much as likely is possible with me.
Even though I am the kind of guy who would take sex daily or almost daily if I could, by the end of our relationship I could go a week without even thinking about having sex with me ex-wife. The reason for this is I think I felt very emasculated by the end of the relationship.
Now in hindsight I also let it happen, but in a very slow way, over the course of several years, my wife wore me down from being an outgoing guy who would hang with his friends and party to a guy who was almost afraid to not rush right home after work and would rehearse how my day went down to the last detail just so I was sure to be able to answer any question she had. If I was five minutes late getting home, I had better have a good excuse, or the argument would come.
So Aristotle, when you say "was it years of rejection, is it the fact you are just not attracted to your wife, no longer interested in sex because she is boring in bed, maybe interested in another sex, porn addiction and prefer to masturbate or the drive for sex is just gone," I can say yes to all of the above except for being interested in another sex. Never had gay or bi thoughts. My sex drive would come and go, and in hindsight I think it had a lot to do with being looked down on by my ex-wife. I was laughed at for masturbating, so I lied and said I never did that and just became good at hiding it. Porn was looked at as so-so when we were first dating and became completely taboo after.
I would say I lost my sex drive as much as I could lose it from the ages of 27 to 30, and we seperated when I was 30.
I know if I was a LD husband, all of the negativity she directed towards me would have pretty much destroyed my sex life completely early on. As it was, I'd say we had sex maybe once every two-three weeks over the last three years of our marriage, and that was only because I was a HD husband whose desire got the best of him and who had no other means of a release.
I think I stayed because I just assumed this is how marriage was and my family and friends didn't say much of anything. After we seperated, I was bombarded with a lot of "We figured your marriage wasn't good," comments, but no one really sat down with me and even asked if I was happy, and I felt like I had no right to complain because I genuienely thought this is how marriage was.
Thankfully, I've had a relationship and sexual 'awakening' since then and while I don't have an ideal sex life, I do have a decent one and I am constantly in the mood for my fiancee. My drive is as high as it's been in about 15 years, and while I am at times frustrated because I want more sex, I'm glad that I have the desire back to a level where I think it should be and I have the knowledge to know that what I want sexually and relationship wise is not out of left field. It's normal, healthy and justified. I'd love to be able to go to my ex, show her a site like this and just say "See, this is right, this is normal. I'm ok, not some weirdo creep."
I hope this helped and I hope I didn't distract from what you were trying to accomplish with this thread. Hopefully this thread will generate some answers for both men and women. Kudos to you for starting it.