Re: anal play...men
Give bj, move down and lick balls, then go further and lick ass, leaving it wet. Go back to bj and slide a finger in bum.
If he loves this, overtime the next few weeks graduate to another finger. If he still gives you hints he wants anal play without ever talking about it, move to anal beads or a small anal plug.
Truth is, gay or not, COMMUNICATE. Talking to you has nothing to do with him doing something others consider gay. Let him know, OTHERS won't know (except us), and he can trust you'll keep it between the two of you. If he trusts you won't tell your friends, his friends, or anyone he will be more open. Ask him what type of anal play he wants, otherwise us suggesting things that some people do consider gay doesn't help much. Some people think a man doing ANYTHING anal is gay, period. Tell your husband lets live our lives for us, not for others.