Begging wife for sex - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-23-2012, 07:52 PM Thread Starter
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Begging wife for sex

hi,
i posted earlier on board found out 2 days ago my wife been having affair with her co worker for past 2 years. Two years ago we were having sex 2 or sometimes 3 times per week. But for past 2 years, i have to beg to have sex. For past 2 years, it seems we only having sex once every 2 weeks. When I found out couple of days ago she was having affair. She told me she never slept with him while dating him for the last 2 years. But if that was true, why we went from having sex 2 or 3 times per week to once ever 2 weeks. Her excuse she been too tired. This make any sense to you people ?
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post #2 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-23-2012, 08:21 PM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

nope, she's lying.
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post #3 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-23-2012, 08:23 PM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

Doubt it. Very sorry
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post #4 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-23-2012, 08:42 PM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

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Originally Posted by Ricky2424 View Post
hi,
i posted earlier on board found out 2 days ago my wife been having affair with her co worker for past 2 years. Two years ago we were having sex 2 or sometimes 3 times per week. But for past 2 years, i have to beg to have sex. For past 2 years, it seems we only having sex once every 2 weeks. When I found out couple of days ago she was having affair. She told me she never slept with him while dating him for the last 2 years. But if that was true, why we went from having sex 2 or 3 times per week to once ever 2 weeks. Her excuse she been too tired. This make any sense to you people ?
i read your other thread.
of course she is too tired.
can YOU guess why?
plus the fact she has an emotional connection to someone else, so thats where her sexual energy and thought are going.
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post #5 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 12:44 AM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

Extremely unlikely that she is / was not sleeping with him.

My take (somewhat unpopular) is "what difference does it make?" She knowingly failed to meet your need for an extended period of time (2 years).

Can you honestly say you would feel better about her if she had just shut down all sex (and not just with you) over those two years? I know that for me the answer is "no". I have never accepted "well I'm not cheating on you" or "I would not do that with anyone" as legitimate reasons for coming up short on me.
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post #6 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 04:57 AM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

i concur with all above.
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post #7 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 09:50 AM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ricky2424 View Post
hi,
i posted earlier on board found out 2 days ago my wife been having affair with her co worker for past 2 years. Two years ago we were having sex 2 or sometimes 3 times per week. But for past 2 years, i have to beg to have sex. For past 2 years, it seems we only having sex once every 2 weeks. When I found out couple of days ago she was having affair. She told me she never slept with him while dating him for the last 2 years. But if that was true, why we went from having sex 2 or 3 times per week to once ever 2 weeks. Her excuse she been too tired. This make any sense to you people ?
I agree with DTO above. Additionally to what he said, I'd also say that if it was just an emotional affair, to me, that's even worse than a physical affair. It's one thing to have sex with a person, total other to fall in love with them.

As for your post though, I ask you to step out of the box for a minute and think about it. If I told you my wife was seeing a guy for two years (dating as you put it) but told me they had never had sex, what would you think?

Add in the fact that her sex drive for you basically went from average to very little at the exact same time. Plus, think about it from the other guys standpoint. If you were him, would you date your wife for two years and be fine with absolutely no sex?

Hate to say it, but I'd be willing to bet my house on the fact your wife slept with him.
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post #8 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 09:58 AM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

She's lying, and you know she's lying. Stop begging, and start leaving.

It's over.
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post #9 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 09:59 AM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

Dang, should this be moved to coping with coping with infidelity section? It must be difficult to detect since every partner changes over the course of the marriage but you have to consider an affair is possible to be the cause for the change of certain habits (mainly sexual) in a marriage, all else being equal. I am sorry that happened to you.
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post #10 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 10:09 AM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

She didn't want to have sex with you because she would have been cheating on her boyfriend. And she was sleeping with him. A woman won't date a man for two years without sex.

She's giving you trickle truth. Right now, she'll tell you they only kissed. If you keep pressing for the truth, she'll claim they only groped through their clothes. Later, that it was only oral. Then, it was just sleeping naked next to each other (no penetration). The truth is probably that she went around the world with him.
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post #11 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 10:11 AM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

this is sad you should probably take your dignity back from her and kick her to the curb.she is definitely telling the truth about being tired but it's because all her energy is being spent on someone else.
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post #12 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 10:15 AM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

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Originally Posted by PHTlump View Post
She didn't want to have sex with you because she would have been cheating on her boyfriend. And she was sleeping with him. A woman won't date a man for two years without sex.

She's giving you trickle truth. Right now, she'll tell you they only kissed. If you keep pressing for the truth, she'll claim they only groped through their clothes. Later, that it was only oral. Then, it was just sleeping naked next to each other (no penetration). The truth is probably that she went around the world with him.
Around the world several times, that would offend me if my spouse said "Oh I've had an affair for 2 years, but DONT WORRY, its nothing sexual" Wow, I am pretty slow and dumb, but for you to try to fool me with that, wow, the spouse saying this should probably consider how ridiculous and dumb they are to think for a second that any person would believe that. The benefit of doubt? pshhh

Local Grocer: "Where were you? I haven't seen you in 2 years"

Wife: "Oh I was hanging out at walmart, didn't buy anything though. So don't worry"


Definitely sorry about what happened to you. There are plenty veterans at the coping with infidelity section.
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post #13 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 11:32 AM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

You can't really be this naive can you? Sorry man, you're plan B. But it almost sounds like you're willing to live with that. She must be pretty hot.
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post #14 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 12:12 PM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

Now you know what happened to your sex

Get tested for STDs, contact a lawyer, divorce her
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post #15 of 15 (permalink) Old 07-24-2012, 12:17 PM
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Re: Begging wife for sex

I suggest posting in the coping with infidelity section.
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