Sex in MarriageSexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.
A. It feels good and I just love to relax and enjoy
B. Sometimes I've found things that bother me, and will immediately cause me distress (something fallen over, car lights through the blinds, a fly or mosquito flying around, a spider on the wall) anything out of the ordinary would tend to get in the way.
Unfortunately I can't always shut my brain off, and can become distracted, even if I'm having the most terrific time. Sometimes anxiety will creep in, and would possibly destroy my mood. If I close my eyes, I can just focus on the feelings and sounds.
That's just the way I am though. Everyone is different. Maybe she's embarrassed about seeing the O face or seeing you watch her makes her uncomfortable? Ask her, she'll be able to tell you if it's worth worrying over.
"All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing."
"Why do we fall? So we might learn to pick ourselves up."
"Itís not who we are underneath, but what we do that defines us."
If she's most comfortable that way you would probably want to leave that preference alone. But if you do want her to make eye contact you could ask her as a favor to you and see if she responds. Just don't expect it all the time, a compromise is a compromise, otherwise it's giving in and giving up your own preference which is uncool as each person should ideally bring something to the table, but also get their fill as well. I think it's better to discuss it outside of the bedroom and in a context that makes it something that she can do for you sometimes, versus something she does for herself all the time, that is hurtful or offensive to you.
I close my eyes quite often. Mostly to try to block out the kids calling thru the door... The times I DO open my eyes, tho, I often notice my husband's eyes are closed. It doesn't bother me. But I agree with the others... it bothers you. Why?
I appreciate the replies (LOL'd at a few of them). I guess a little background info would help. Our sex life is actually pretty decent (1-3/per week). this is just something I have noticed recently. The reason this is slightly bothersome to me is, I worry she is possibly not attracted to me/fantasising about other men. I did bring it up to her once and she was a little defensive so I figured it best just to not press the issue. Your replies have helped- thanks