My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing
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Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 08-09-2012, 02:56 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

Hi,

I already have another thread with generic issues but this one for a specific issue. My wife doesn't like to use tongue or even to open up the mouth while kissing, if I have to kiss then it is that she will close her lips (sometimes very tight) and then I will kiss but not more than a few seconds and if accidently my tongue touches her lips or if there is anything wet then its over she will push me away and clean her lips. What should I do, as I love to kiss and I love to use tongue and in past I had been a very good kisser.
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Old 08-09-2012, 03:14 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

Im dealing with something similar. I am complaining that my wife doesnt kiss me often enough. Some days not at all and when we do kiss its like kissing your grandmother or something. Closed mouth and pretty fast. I not looking for a high school make our session every time but I passionate kiss from time to time would be fine. I would like a kiss every day at the least of any kind.. granny kiss or not. I will say that when we make love she will kiss me with tongue open mouthed.

So Bro I know that probably didnt help you at all but at least you know you're not alone.

Maybe make sure your lips are not slimy wet and you have nice fresh breath.. If all else fails... Ask her.. lol

Good luck
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Old 08-09-2012, 03:20 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

Thanks Fight4It ..... But I have asked her millions of times ..... She just says no I don't like it nothing wet. ...... She has never ever initiated a kiss, or even tried to kiss me, Only if I ask her to kiss me then she would kiss me on cheeks. At non-sexual time, if I approach to kiss her she would just turn her face and offer her cheek for a kiss. I hate that. and if I insist to kiss then she will close her lips tight and then just stand still, and I wold feel like kissing a statue and gets really a turn off for me.

I have tried brushing my teeth and using the mouth wash and everything before a single kiss but never works I ask her to open up the mouth and she simply says no. Once I ask her that I would keep my lips dry and closed and she may just touch my lips with her tongue, but she said no and didn't do that even.

But good to know I am not alone
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Old 08-09-2012, 03:30 AM   #4 (permalink)
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My stbxh also dislikes open mouthed kissing. Frustrating for me because passionate kisses are such an incredible turn on for me and the lack makes me feel unwanted.

You're not alone. Alas, no helpful advice to share. Just sympathizing.
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Old 08-09-2012, 03:37 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

New to the group and looking for similar issues to know I'm not alone, My wife also doesn't kiss, shame too... I also love to kiss it's a good way to get things rolling. Anyway I digress she seems to have a saliva phobia or something not that I'm a wet kisser never have been or maybe it's an excuse because she doesn't like the way I kiss. Anyway you're not alone on this one take care
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Old 08-09-2012, 03:51 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

If you don't mind me asking Needyforhelp how old is your wife. ,,

at Moxy.. I hear ya.. I think kissing is a very intimate act. I feel emotionally connected when well do actually kiss very passionately. Anybody can just go poking around sexually and that not feel that intimate but when you connect on that mental level and share a real good kiss its great. I really miss that about our relationship.
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Old 08-09-2012, 03:53 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

Fight4It

I am 31 and my wife is 30. We got married almost 3.5 years ago so I was 27 and she was 26 when we go married.
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Old 08-09-2012, 03:57 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

I turn 47 on Saturday and she is 44 we have been married for 24 years and together for 25 and a 1/2
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Old 08-09-2012, 04:07 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

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Originally Posted by needyForHelp View Post
Thanks Fight4It ..... But I have asked her millions of times ..... She just says no I don't like it nothing wet. ...... She has never ever initiated a kiss, or even tried to kiss me, Only if I ask her to kiss me then she would kiss me on cheeks. At non-sexual time, if I approach to kiss her she would just turn her face and offer her cheek for a kiss. I hate that. and if I insist to kiss then she will close her lips tight and then just stand still, and I wold feel like kissing a statue and gets really a turn off for me.

I have tried brushing my teeth and using the mouth wash and everything before a single kiss but never works I ask her to open up the mouth and she simply says no. Once I ask her that I would keep my lips dry and closed and she may just touch my lips with her tongue, but she said no and didn't do that even.

But good to know I am not alone
How would you describe the level of intimacy in your marriage?
Does she perform oral sex on you?
Do you perform oral sex on her?
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Old 08-09-2012, 04:13 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

WEll I would say no sexual intimacy ..... She never does and I am convinced she never would perform oral on me, I love to perform oral and have tried many times but she doesn't let me do it ..... she would just close down and push me away or even just finish everything happening if she finds out I am trying to perform oral. Sometimes if I want to have sex but she doesn't want to have it and I am pushing it too much then she might perform HJ but only if I have a condom on or will keep tissues near by and then leave right after I ejaculated but still in Orgasm to wash room to wash her hands.

And in her mind the rule is if I have ejaculated ...... no matter how, the sex untill the next time (could be a week or even several weeks later) is over, that means there is no concept of having sex or any intimacy twice ....... if I manage to make her orgasm with hands ... then she won't let me touch her for a couple of minutes and then just lie down motion less for me to come over and get ejaculated in her ....... but obviously with atleast her shirt on and if I don't touch her anywhere especially her breasts.

Last edited by needyForHelp; 08-09-2012 at 04:21 AM.
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Old 08-09-2012, 04:37 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

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WEll I would say no sexual intimacy ..... She never does and I am convinced she never would perform oral on me, I love to perform oral and have tried many times but she doesn't let me do it ..... she would just close down and push me away or even just finish everything happening if she finds out I am trying to perform oral. Sometimes if I want to have sex but she doesn't want to have it and I am pushing it too much then she might perform HJ but only if I have a condom on or will keep tissues near by and then leave right after I ejaculated but still in Orgasm to wash room to wash her hands.

And in her mind the rule is if I have ejaculated ...... no matter how, the sex untill the next time (could be a week or even several weeks later) is over, that means there is no concept of having sex or any intimacy twice ....... if I manage to make her orgasm with hands ... then she won't let me touch her for a couple of minutes and then just lie down motion less for me to come over and get ejaculated in her ....... but obviously with atleast her shirt on and if I don't touch her anywhere especially her breasts.
Wow man. The age thing I was thinking she was just really young and inexperienced but that does'nt really fit. Was she a virgin when you first were intimate together ?

I she a germ-a-phobe (please dont take offense I mean no disrespect) Does she always need to be washing her hands and stuff.

Im no expert. I've been with my wife for 16 years and have only been with one other women. Just sounds very odd to me.
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Old 08-09-2012, 04:39 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

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Originally Posted by needyForHelp View Post
WEll I would say no sexual intimacy ..... She never does and I am convinced she never would perform oral on me, I love to perform oral and have tried many times but she doesn't let me do it ..... she would just close down and push me away or even just finish everything happening if she finds out I am trying to perform oral. Sometimes if I want to have sex but she doesn't want to have it and I am pushing it too much then she might perform HJ but only if I have a condom on or will keep tissues near by and then leave right after I ejaculated but still in Orgasm to wash room to wash her hands.

And in her mind the rule is if I have ejaculated ...... no matter how, the sex untill the next time (could be a week or even several weeks later) is over, that means there is no concept of having sex or any intimacy twice ....... if I manage to make her orgasm with hands ... then she won't let me touch her for a couple of minutes and then just lie down motion less for me to come over and get ejaculated in her ....... but obviously with atleast her shirt on and if I don't touch her anywhere especially her breasts.
Do either of you have any previous sexual experience?
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Old 08-09-2012, 04:39 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by needyForHelp View Post
WEll I would say no sexual intimacy ..... She never does and I am convinced she never would perform oral on me, I love to perform oral and have tried many times but she doesn't let me do it ..... she would just close down and push me away or even just finish everything happening if she finds out I am trying to perform oral. Sometimes if I want to have sex but she doesn't want to have it and I am pushing it too much then she might perform HJ but only if I have a condom on or will keep tissues near by and then leave right after I ejaculated but still in Orgasm to wash room to wash her hands.

And in her mind the rule is if I have ejaculated ...... no matter how, the sex untill the next time (could be a week or even several weeks later) is over, that means there is no concept of having sex or any intimacy twice ....... if I manage to make her orgasm with hands ... then she won't let me touch her for a couple of minutes and then just lie down motion less for me to come over and get ejaculated in her ....... but obviously with atleast her shirt on and if I don't touch her anywhere especially her breasts.
Wow she acts like she thinks sex is dirty...maybe sit her down and tell her that ain't what you signed on for...
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Old 08-09-2012, 04:40 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Default Re: My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

Yes she was a virgin when we got married. and I am sureshe is not germ-o-phobic for sure. Its not like she has a disease of being anti-germic .... but yes she would wash hands before eating or cooking. In a very normal way.
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Old 08-09-2012, 04:42 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: My wife doesn't like to open up mouth while kissing

I read your other post that this was an arranged marriage. It sounds like your wife is not attracted to you and it makes her uncomfortable when you try anything sexual or intimate with her.

Is it at all possible that she was with or in love with someone else prior to the arrangment with you and there's resentment or something there?
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