Prostate Massage?
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Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 08-31-2012, 07:17 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Prostate Massage?

I've read a lot online about how guys can have a pretty intense orgasm if their prostate is massaged during oral sex.

I have never even brought this up to my husband because I KNOW he would totally take it the wrong way and think this is something only homosexual men would enjoy, even though, I have read tons about heterosexual men *thoroughly* enjoying this. So I tossed around the idea tonight and he didn't exactly seem put off by it. Of course he cracked some jokes but ultimately I think he is curious.

How does this work? To the men who have experienced this, what was it like? I'd like to try it but just seriously don't even know where to start....
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Old 08-31-2012, 07:35 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Prostate Massage?

What's it like? Well normally I have GREAT control. Like, I can finish in 5 minutes or 35 minutes. I can easily hold back and then when I want to finish I just let it happen. But with PM (and my wife has never done it to me so I'm going by memory here) the control is completely gone. I can't hold it back at all. I actually worried that I was peeing or something it was so quick and powerful.
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Old 08-31-2012, 07:41 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Prostate Massage?

Make sure he's clean, make sure you use plenty of lube, and just go for it with your fingers first. Tell him to let you know how it feels. Listen to what he says, and make sure he's relaxed. Anal play is largely contingent on the recipient being very relaxed, otherwise there will be a lot of discomfort. You both need to be patient because it might take awhile before he feels any pleasure. You two will figure it out if you listen to one another, remain open, and ride your way through the trial and error.

Another good, relatively easier entry into anal pleasure is a rim job. Pleasure his anus with your tongue, which can feel mindblowing for a man who's sensitive to that.

I use to do a lot of self exploration, and discovered anal pleasure during masturbation. A couple times I was able to make myself cum without even touching my penis from prostate pleasuring alone. The orgasm and ejaculation with anal involved tends to be more powerful, last longer, and produced a lot more semen.

I get light anal play in my marriage every once in awhile, but for the most part she doesn't do it much, and I almost never do it during masturbation now; most of the anal play in our marriage is on her, as she only relatively recently discovered she LOVES having her ass played with. It can feel really good, but I guess I never indulged frequently enough for it to become second nature. To be honest, at least from my experience, while there were times when the spot was hit just right, there were more times when it didn't do anything for me at all and was just uncomfortable and not worth the trouble.
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Old 08-31-2012, 07:49 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Prostate Massage?

So do you stick your entire finger in there? Is it similar to fingering a woman?

WorkingOnMe: when you say no control, how long does it take? I assume you are comfortable with it. Is this something you would like your wife to do?

jaquen: What was your first time like? Was it strange at all?
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Old 08-31-2012, 08:02 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Prostate Massage?

It's not very deep. Maybe an inch or so. You'll be able to feel it toward his front.

I release very quickly this way. A minute or less. Also, I'll release whether hard or soft, although hard feels much better. And I can't stress enough to make sure you use some lube.

I'd love for my wife to do it. But it's not exactly something that would be easy to bring up.
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Old 08-31-2012, 08:12 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Prostate Massage?

You can buy prostate massagers..they are like skinny gspot vibrators. Use plenty of lube and just explore. Ask your husband where it feels best and let him guide you and teach you..just talk to him sensually and let him relax and enjoy it. He can have really intense orgasms this way. May not happen the first time, but with patience and practice you'll both get better at it....
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Old 08-31-2012, 08:13 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Prostate Massage?

Quote:
Originally Posted by kl84 View Post
So do you stick your entire finger in there? Is it similar to fingering a woman?
Stick as much of your finger in as feels comfortable to him. Ask him to communicate what feels good to him, and what does not. If he enjoys the sensation, you can then move on to more fingers, and possibly toys.

It can be similar to fingering a girl, but then again that depends on the technique used when fingering a girl. There is variety to both.

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Originally Posted by kl84 View Post
jaquen: What was your first time like? Was it strange at all?
First time with myself, or with a woman?

With myself, yes, it was definitely strange, both mentally and physically. I was a teenager, and curious about the sensation. I had a lot of insecurity about even trying it on my own, bullcrap homo fears and all. Initially I didn't feel anything but discomfort. But I was really into learning my body back then, and so I persisted. When I finally hit that "sweet spot" moment, it was like a lightbulb going off. It is a very intense kind of pleasure. Eventually I ended up sticking all kinds of strange stuff up my ass!

The first time I had any anal play with a woman was two years ago when my wife just decided, on her own, with no prompting or asking from me, to throw back my my legs and just lick my anus. It was...incredible

Also keep in mind that you do NOT need to insert anything in his rectum in order to pleasure his prostate. Pressing down on the perineum, the space between his scrotum and anus, while he's aroused can produce similar results without needing to penetrate him.

Last edited by jaquen; 08-31-2012 at 08:22 PM.
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Old 08-31-2012, 08:30 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Prostate Massage?

Don't wish for any to misconstrue, but I understand that this process is a ancient trick used by prostitutes in order to be able to collect their payment as quickly as possible in order to move on to a different client.
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Old 08-31-2012, 08:31 PM   #9 (permalink)
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What's it like? Well normally I have GREAT control. Like, I can finish in 5 minutes or 35 minutes. I can easily hold back and then when I want to finish I just let it happen. But with PM (and my wife has never done it to me so I'm going by memory here) the control is completely gone. I can't hold it back at all. I actually worried that I was peeing or something it was so quick and powerful.
OT.....

I actually texted my husband your response and he said he has felt that way a couple times just from me giving him a regular bj. I asked him if he can recall the specific incidents and he said "whenever I tell you not to touch it".

Basically, there have been plenty of times where he has literally erupted after a bj and though I don't let him finish in my mouth, I do continue stroking, usually licking his friends down there (lol) and it gets to a point where he has to tell me to stop because it's entirely too sensitive.

I finally asked him what he thought would happen if I didn't stop and he said he'd probably scream. So I said basically, bad or good? And he said he didn't know. I'm really not trying to brag here but he has never *not* ejaculated from a bj from me and usually it only takes a couple minutes.... so would the anal thing be overkill? And also, what is this "don't touch it" thing about? Of course I asked him but honestly I think sometimes he gets nervous talking about these things
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Old 08-31-2012, 08:32 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hookares View Post
Don't wish for any to misconstrue, but I understand that this process is a ancient trick used by prostitutes in order to be able to collect their payment as quickly as possible in order to move on to a different client.
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Old 08-31-2012, 08:33 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: Prostate Massage?

Quote:
Originally Posted by jaquen View Post
Stick as much of your finger in as feels comfortable to him. Ask him to communicate what feels good to him, and what does not. If he enjoys the sensation, you can then move on to more fingers, and possibly toys.

It can be similar to fingering a girl, but then again that depends on the technique used when fingering a girl. There is variety to both.



First time with myself, or with a woman?

With myself, yes, it was definitely strange, both mentally and physically. I was a teenager, and curious about the sensation. I had a lot of insecurity about even trying it on my own, bullcrap homo fears and all. Initially I didn't feel anything but discomfort. But I was really into learning my body back then, and so I persisted. When I finally hit that "sweet spot" moment, it was like a lightbulb going off. It is a very intense kind of pleasure. Eventually I ended up sticking all kinds of strange stuff up my ass!

The first time I had any anal play with a woman was two years ago when my wife just decided, on her own, with no prompting or asking from me, to throw back my my legs and just lick my anus. It was...incredible

Also keep in mind that you do NOT need to insert anything in his rectum in order to pleasure his prostate. Pressing down on the perineum, the space between his scrotum and anus, while he's aroused can produce similar results without needing to penetrate him.
How hard do you press? Do you just apply pressure and that's it? I've messed around there a few times during sex and oral but didn't know if I was producing any results lol.
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Old 08-31-2012, 08:35 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: Prostate Massage?

I'm as hetero as they come and I love love love prostate massages. My wife won't do it because she's got a ton of sexual hangups but the rare times I have received them years ago it was awesome.
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Old 08-31-2012, 08:45 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: Prostate Massage?

I'm dying for my wife to do this to me but she won't bite. After reading about this intense and different orgasm, I need to feel it. First trial with a prostate massager didn't do the trick. It felt a little different, but I couldnt find the spot again after briefly touching it.
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Old 08-31-2012, 09:00 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Default Re: Prostate Massage?

It very intense and wonderful. Like the other posters, I'm very straight. Straight guys and gay guys have the same anatomy and the same things feel good. Straight men just want to do it with a woman.

A skinny prostate massager works very well. When not aroused, a prostate massage feels okay. When aroused, it starts to feel very good. When close to orgasm, the feeling is indescribable. It's like there's another penis inside that's getting pleasured. I don't have an orgasm unless my penis is being stimulated. If it works out well, you can buy some hands free massagers that work during intercourse.
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Old 08-31-2012, 09:47 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: Prostate Massage?

Quote:
Originally Posted by kl84 View Post
How hard do you press? Do you just apply pressure and that's it? I've messed around there a few times during sex and oral but didn't know if I was producing any results lol.
Start with light pressure. If he feels anything tell him to let you know if he wants it harder, and he can inform you of what level feels best for him.

The key to all of this is creating an environment where he is very open, and relaxed enough, to allow himself to feel what's working, and inform you of what to do.
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