What is real sex? I married my first and only.
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Navigation »Talk About Marriage »Focused Topics »Sex in Marriage » What is real sex? I married my first and only.

Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 10-25-2012, 11:56 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default What is real sex? I married my first and only.

I married him when I was 20 after 3 years of dating. I never had any sexual experience before. After almost 14 year together, our sex takes about 5 minutes or less. I do not feel much when he kiss me or touch me. When we do have intercourse, he can be done in 2 minutes if I let him. He never gives me orgasm this way. I have to work on having one by being on the top.
He does not like going down on me, but when he does - it feels great. That is the only thing I really enjoy lately but it does not happen more than once a month and I must ask for it.
So, my question is, how real sex should look like? Is this all what I can get?

Last edited by BridgetJones; 10-25-2012 at 12:23 PM.
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Old 10-25-2012, 12:16 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: What is real sex? I married my first and only.

Um no this isn't what real sex looks like. Does he have no interest in pleasing you?
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Old 10-25-2012, 12:20 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: What is real sex? I married my first and only.

That's pitiful. Buy yourself a rabbit vibrator and a box of AA batteries. That will give you more orgasms than this sap ever will.
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Old 10-25-2012, 12:24 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: What is real sex? I married my first and only.

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Originally Posted by 40isthenew20 View Post
That's pitiful. Buy yourself a rabbit vibrator and a box of AA batteries. That will give you more orgasms than this sap ever will.


And then you'll feel what you've been missing and you'll stop settling for crumbs.
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Old 10-25-2012, 12:37 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by 40isthenew20 View Post
That's pitiful. Buy yourself a rabbit vibrator and a box of AA batteries.
I agree. Also use the rabbit beforehand as foreplay. Actually I use rechargeable batteries.lol

Have you discussed this with your husband? He may have issues with this and can not help it. I can't think of what it's called, my mind is blank. Early projectile?
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Old 10-25-2012, 12:47 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: What is real sex? I married my first and only.

I also married my one and only (at 16 & 17) and our sex is NOTHING like you describe. I could make love for hours, I always make sure she has hers first (if she desires) and if I do go first, I will bring to orgasm orally. I absolutely LOVE giving her oral. I could go on and on. However, I wish I had a suggestion. have you talked? Does he care to do differently? (BTW married for over 40n years.)
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The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. Marriage is not a place to "stand up for your rights." Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out. 1 Corinthians 7:2 (The Message)
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Old 10-25-2012, 01:18 PM   #7 (permalink)
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That's pitiful. Buy yourself a rabbit vibrator and a box of AA batteries. That will give you more orgasms than this sap ever will.
Thats what i would do.

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Old 10-25-2012, 01:30 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: What is real sex? I married my first and only.

I think the other posters are being a little rough on your husband.

with that said everybody is responcible for their own orgasm. have you told him your not orgasming and that you would like more oral? do you give him oral? you got to give to get in my book.

I would talk to him about spicing it up for the both of you. explain to him that most women need ample clit stimulation to have an orgasm. maybe even masterbate for him so he knows what you like.
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