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Navigation »Talk About Marriage »Focused Topics »Sex in Marriage » Masturbating for your spouse

Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 11-27-2012, 11:03 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

my wife does NOT want to see me masturbate.

I would like to see her do it, but she would feel uncomfortable.

Come to think of it, I would feel funny doing it front of her. It would be easy to masturbate in front of a stranger than my wife
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Old 11-27-2012, 11:10 AM   #17 (permalink)
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So I'm suddenly feeling all alone here in the corner, but that is not something I would ever have asked to see him do. I guess I wouldn't be surprised if he wanted to watch me, but the reverse just never crossed my mind.

Maybe I'll find myself reconsidering someday? The above posts sound convincing despite my doubts.
You're not alone. I've mentioned it to my wife several times after seeing threads like this. No interest. In fact, very much against it. That is, she is against it. Not me.
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Old 11-27-2012, 11:21 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

I love to watch him - but I will admit it's hard to JUST watch and not jump in and participate so it often ends that way!
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Old 11-27-2012, 01:11 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

My wife and I were fooling around and after she had been performing oral on my I started stroking myself. She saw it and thought it was hot. She asked my to do it more, but I felt that if I'm having sex infrequently, it's going to be PIV or PIA. Masturbation is a fall-back position.
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Old 11-27-2012, 01:22 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

Wife and I both masturbate in front of each other.... sometimes to "cumpletion" and other times as foreplay. Very arousing.
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Old 11-27-2012, 04:24 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

You said that you want your wife to watch you. But do you want to watch your wife? Have you ever asked her about it? That might be a really good way to start the conversation. Ask her if she would be willing to do it for you. If she says yes, then watch her and then ask her if she would like for you to reciprocate. If she says no, tell her you would be willing to go first to get things rolling.
My wife and I do this for each other on occasion. Probably once out of every 10 times we have sex we will masturbate ourselves to orgasm in front of each other. VERY HOT! But if I had to be honest, now that we have done it quite a few times, it doesn't seem to be as important or as much of a thrill as it used to be.
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Old 11-27-2012, 04:36 PM   #22 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

my wife doesnt care for it..I did it one time, she was mostly just concerned that I didnt get the sheets wet...
she wouldnt ever touch herself...Ive suggested it many times, but she is disgusted by the thought of it.
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Old 11-27-2012, 04:38 PM   #23 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

My wife says that she gets nothing out of watching me masturbate. She will help me finish off that way a lot but it doesn't lead to sex - at least the majority of the time.

She claims that she doesn't at all and won't for me, either. But I'm working on that. She did once years ago so I know she has it in her.
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Old 11-27-2012, 04:59 PM   #24 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

I have not done it for my wife, who would be rather disturbed if I did, I think.

And she seems to not want to talk about or even let on about her masturbating, but I do think she does at least once in a blue moon.

It's my plan to very gently coax her into the idea of doing some stimulation in my presence, while we're engaged in some intimacy of some kind. Have to break down the barrier she's erected where she says "I feel strange trying to do that".

The idea is to get her to stop resisting making herself feel good. It's a barrier she's built mentally and I'd prefer to take it down. I know they can be taken down, because she's broken down many of them over the years.

I'd prefer she were comfortable enough with sexuality that I could walk into the bedroom, find her using a vibrator and it not cause her embarassment.
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Old 11-27-2012, 05:32 PM   #25 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

I did however masturbate the other day for a bit just after doing it doggy style..most of it ended up around her booty but some shot up to her shoulder..she was freaked out by it and ran off to the bathroom..
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Old 11-27-2012, 06:08 PM   #26 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

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I did however masturbate the other day for a bit just after doing it doggy style..most of it ended up around her booty but some shot up to her shoulder..she was freaked out by it and ran off to the bathroom..
lol. Keeps her on her toes.
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Old 11-27-2012, 06:15 PM   #27 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

I like watching my husband though I normally get too worked up to let him finish. I do it for him as well, but took some getting used to. We both enjoy it occasionally.
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Old 11-27-2012, 06:39 PM   #28 (permalink)
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I find it sad that some women think it is disgusting. For me it is not just about watching him do the actual deed but how turned on I get from him being turned on.
The look on his face, the sounds he makes and the complete release he gets from it, he is happy which makes me happy. I think it is one of the most intimate parts of our sex life.
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Old 11-27-2012, 06:45 PM   #29 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

Holland -- what is your husband using for his arousal? If you, what do you do for him while he does that?
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Old 11-27-2012, 06:55 PM   #30 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbating for your spouse

My wife and I have done that for years. She watches me but, she will never do herself. Unless it is during intercourse. Hailey2009. You don't know what you are missing.
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