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Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 06-27-2009, 07:10 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Masturbation

I am truly curious about something. There are numerous mentions throughout the posts about the normality of married men masturbating. Not counting the men who are being denied by their partners - do a majority of married men with "normal" (dangerous word) sex lives masturbate? And by clarification I mean by themselves and not part of a sex act with their partner.
Since I have been married I have never considered it. If something arousing is on TV or something, it may add to the next sex-time; but running off on my own and taking care of myself truly never enters into my mind.

Before anyone declares "open season" on this post, maybe I am way out of step and should even ask the question the other way: Are there married men who don't masturbate?

I am truly curious.
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Old 06-27-2009, 10:10 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbation

My wife gets pissed if i masturbate with out her. She wants to take care of all my needs.
Sometimes it hard as she is walking out of the bedroom in the morning to go to work and she is looking all hott and sexy in her suit of confidence. I really want to be with her. but, i can't wait 8-9 hrs for her to come home.
I always make up for it when she comes home. She is half naked before she get in the house.

We play our favorite game...Cowboys and Indians
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Old 06-28-2009, 06:00 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbation

In the morning..when I went to brush my teeth...I'd masturbate, too. It was just something I'd do.
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Old 06-28-2009, 09:53 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbation

my husband and i have been together for 4 years, married for 3.. and hes NEVER "handle" himself.. Ive even asked him too when I wouldnt be in the "mood" for sex.. he says "i dont like whacking off, its nasty" ... he says hes NEVER done it.. not even in his teen years..remind you hes not 24.. he would rather me "whack" him off then do it himself... if he's in the mood befor he goes to work, and normally the baby is awake, then he will wait it out 8-12hrs until he gets home that night... i dont understand it.. i thought it was a natural thing... I cant wait to see MT's responce on this subject >=)
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Old 06-28-2009, 12:54 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbation

Yeah, me too. I don't know of any male that doesn't do it! Nasty??? For something that feels so good? Yeah, right!
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Old 06-28-2009, 01:20 PM   #6 (permalink)
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he says it just feels weird.. but if it feels weird for him to do it.. wouldnt it feel weird if i done it for him? ... most of the time i go to bed befor he does, and once i fall asleep, i dont wanna be woke up for a quicky.. so instead of fixing himself, he'll lay on his side and just hump the bed until he falls asleep...

however.. he has fallin asleep.. or claimed to be asleep, and says he didnt know he was doin it, but, be humpin me.. and it eventually turn into a quicky.. and its all because i get woken up with a stiffy in my rear... im so thankful i dont have the same equipment men have.. i couldnt handle it.
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Old 06-28-2009, 01:48 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Masturbation

Quote:
Originally Posted by amberlynn View Post
I cant wait to see MT's responce on this subject >=)
You won't like it

In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with married men playing with it, but they should not solo ejaculate unless they are having sex less than once per month. There are 2 reasons for this:

1)If they have wives that like sex, they should save all their sexual energy for her.

2)If they have wives that have gone off sex, they need to let the frustration build up so that it motivates them to do something about it. By letting off steam with solo ejaculations, the pressure to fix the marriage will be less.

I do certain "exercises" that involve self stimulation, but when I get to the edge I stop, and wait until things calm down before resuming. Yesterday, I was not able to stop fast enough, but that only happens 2 or 3 times a year. However, I did not let a drop out because I have developed my pelvic floor muscles to the point where I can clench and hold until the contractions pass.

I hope that answers your question

PS. There are many threads here on TAM where women complain that hubby whacks off to porn all day, and never wants sex with his them. If they cut out the solo ejaculations, most of them would want sex, even if they couldn't stand their wives. It's just a cop-out.

On the other hand, most people agree that zero ejaculations are not healthy. So in a sexless marriage where the woman has gone off sex, a maintenance routine is required, of between once per week to once per month depending on the age of the man.
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Old 06-28-2009, 02:01 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by dcrim View Post
In the morning..when I went to brush my teeth...I'd masturbate, too. It was just something I'd do.
Darn, am truly impressed with the coordination you have dcrim! The mental image is truly entertaining !

Pat your tummy and rub your head at the same time, too dcrim?

My dh doing himself is fine with me, without me, in between me...whatever. It just isn't an issue with us.

He doesn't object to me doing me whenever either. He is gone for a week or more at a time.

If I had to wait for him to return I'd be one "Crabby Patty"!
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Old 06-28-2009, 02:03 PM   #9 (permalink)
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it doesnt bother me that he doesnt pleasure himself.. its kinda kinky that he saves it and builds up for me, the more he saves, the more energy he has and the more he explodes.... altho it would be kinkier to watch him pleasure himself.. but.. it wont happen..but its okay... i dont mind helping.. i have my own special ways of workin him up..
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Old 06-28-2009, 02:04 PM   #10 (permalink)
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MT: "...a maintenance routine is required, of between once per week to once per month depending on the age of the..." (car?)

At times, MT, your sex advice regarding frequency sounds like a routine oil change for a car....
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Old 06-28-2009, 02:07 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Sandy55 View Post
MT:
At times, MT, your sex advice regarding frequency sounds like a routine oil change for a car....
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Old 06-28-2009, 02:19 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sandy55 View Post
MT: "...a maintenance routine is required, of between once per week to once per month depending on the age of the..." (car?)

At times, MT, your sex advice regarding frequency sounds like a routine oil change for a car....
I blew a van up a while ago going flat-out on the freeway because I forgot to check the oil level before setting off. No joke
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Old 06-28-2009, 02:21 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Yes, MT, we KNOW you were not thinking of your car!

U sew funee, MT.
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Old 06-28-2009, 02:29 PM   #14 (permalink)
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...but I topped it up with the sperm I had been retaining all month and went quietly on my way






(just kidding, don't try this at home folks).
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Old 06-28-2009, 07:12 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Holy sh*t. My sides hurt from laughing.....
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