07-03-2009, 09:47 PM
Join Date: Jul 2008
| | Re: Hopless and frustrated newlywed wife
Originally Posted by hopeformore
sometimes, I feel like he is having sex with me as a job..not bcoz he wants to make love to me.
Ya i know that feeling. When i first moved in with my H he never wanted sex (three years later he's still not really interested). and he never lasted long when we did. i went to all kinds of extremes trying to figure out what was wrong, how to fix it. i asked what he wanted, tried to dress the way he liked, do the things he liked, etc. you know what it got me? two years later he tells me he resents me for trying to "make" him have sex.
I found out my H was into porn, though. even after i found that out i still tried everything to help him. i wanted to fix the relationship but he was not interested.
all i can tell you is just back off. i know that sucks, its frustrating, and its demoralizing, believe me ive been there, but you cannot make him want to work on the relationship. As hard as it is, he's not interested. Stop forcing it or it'll just get ugly and you will keep getting hurt. protect your own heart.
"I'm a lover of what is, not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality."
- Bryon Katie